Seamen in his boxer shorts?

[Mumtobenovember]

I'm heavily pregnant and me and dp have been arguing and we haven't really been intimate he's being a dick basically- I just went into the bathroom and his boxers are on the floor he just took them off and had a shower after being at the gym and they have a white stain in about the size of a 50p is this normal? Do men get discharge?!! I don't want to kick off over a bit of knob discharge

Hi OP sorry didn't know your previous Ill health. I hope you get some help and respite from feeling bad and that any problems with your DP can be sorted out and that you can be kind to each other.
Please don't take the jokes yesterday to heart.

Mumtobenovember Best to see the doc and have a chat.
I don't think that posters meant to be unkind, some people just didn't realise how bad you were feeling.
Sending you lots of good wishes and really hope you let us know how you are doing. I will be thinking of you.

Clearly something wasn't right given most people thought you were being dramatic and had list your perspective. I think you're doing the right thing by talking about it to see that, and the right thing by seeking help.

Good luck, take care.

Mumtobe

As a friend often says about some of the members on here - nasty bunch of vipers. I wouldn't go that far, but yes there are some insensitive souls about, and often rather ignorant to a situation.

I hope you are ok. Don't ignore your gut feeling, they're there for a reason and often right.

Oh, and there are plenty of us here that will post sage advice and support.

After much shouting and tears things seem to be better in my household I just stopped throwing accusations and stopped making stuff up in my head it hit home when he told me that the last couple of months he dreads coming home to me because I'm really hard to live with and I'm so miserable- Now I have the battle of not taking things that where said in the heat of argument to heart- I'm pretending I'm okay but I still have all these thoughts in my head he's only sticking around for the baby's sake why else would he want to put up with me

I hope your GP can help with some medication. Depression is awful and mixed with the effects of pregnancy hormones it is even worse.

Your reactions are causing part at least of these problems. Don't blame yourself because. you can't help it, but make sure you get some help.

Why don't you do something nice together today? Make an effort together to have a nice time even if it is just going out shopping or for a walk and lunch. And do not talk about anything difficult- try to relax.

Is it a first baby for both of you? It is for us and we are excited but pregnancy and its effects are very strange

When are you seeing your GP? Also, what about talking to your midwife or health visitor, they will have lots of sensible advice and may be able to point you in the direction of support.

i am sure he isn't just staying for the baby. he loves you, and he probably doesn't know how to help you. perhaps take him with you to the gp. good luck

These could be intrusive or paranoid thoughts OP and you don't need to live with them - do see your doctor.

I will I'm going to go asap.. I just feel terribly guilty now.. Like I have ruined the experience if becoming parents for the first time and like he resents me for it.. I'm so worried I'm going to get PND terrified in fact your right I don't think he knows what to do with me, realising what I have been like is the first step right?

Yes it is, how are you to know these thoughts aren't reality?

Please don't be so hard on yourself, but do go and see a doctor.

Explain to your oh what you're experiencing, and that you're going to seek help, he'll be nothing but relieved I'm sure.

Probably just precum if it was cum it would be all over the front unless he doesn't shoot a lot. Sorry if that sounds vile

Hi OP.

Small stains in my underpants are normal for me, they can occur after solo sex or sometimes for no reason that I can see. On it's own, it's no reason to worry.

OP it's not your fault you feel like this, you haven't done anything to cause it and you haven't ruined your pregnancy. You wouldn't blame yourself for morning sickness or backache would you, this is just another symptom which might or might not be pregnancy related.

Well said Fairenuff

Please call your doctor. This is not your fault, please go and get help you don't have to feel like this.

I suffered horrific depression during/after pregnancy and nearly lost my DH because of it. It got to the point where had I not gone to the doctors, he would have left. Thankfully we are stronger than ever now and I realise my mood swings weren't my fault, I was ill. Go and get some help and look forward to becoming parents together x

See your GP and also your midwife, and take your partner along. Your midwife needs to know so they can monitor you closely post natal for signs of depression. She will also be able to give you lots of support.

Pregnancy and hormones creates all sorts of havoc with your body and mind, so don't be too hard on yourself. My OH said I was a nightmare when pregnant, which I was but often it's totally out of your control and you don't even realize it's happening.

Talk to your partner, and keep him informed of how you are feeling and your appointments. Let him support you if he's willing to, I know it's difficult for men to appreciate what pregnancy is like but let him help and listen to you.

Have a nice day out or an evening out if you can, maybe cinema and a meal, a walk in the countryside and a picnic? Make the most of your time together before that little person makes an appearance.

did you get help OP? how are you doing? x

Was just coming here to ask the same thing, 4littleones

Thinking of you OP, how's it going?

If you don't want to come back to this thread, which may attract new posters who haven't read it all, you could always start a new one just for support for yourself and link it here if you want to x

Hi OP, only just saw this thread. Hope you are ok and I hope the doctor helps. It sounds as if you have really low self esteem.

Do you like reading? There is a book called 'Taming your Gremlin' about negative thoughts and the problems they cause. I have only read a little bit so far, I too have problems with this. My DH once asked why can't I just be happy instead of always looking for things to make me miserable, which was a valid question.

Reminds me of my favourite ever crossword clue: Seamen mop up anal infusions (6)

We didnt have sex when I was pg because we werent getting on. I was ruining it for him with my moods and accusations. He distanced himself and stayed out because he didnt want to come home to more shit from me. I was told I needed to see the doctor as I was clearly depressed and getting paranoid by seeing things that werent there.

Except I wasnt depressed and paranoid. What I saw was not made up in my head. It was all lies and he was cheating.

To paraphrase, just because you are paranoid doesnt mean that he isnt lying to you.

Oh and I am utterly disgusted as some of the posts on here, you should be fucking ashamed of yourselves. The OPs pain and confusion were so clear in her first post and all you did was take the piss.

MN at its worst.