I'm a fucking mug

[ReallySadFace]

Dh, who I have posted about before (name changed) has just fucking grabbed me again and bruised my neck and given me a fat lip. This is after hitting me around the face with cushions after I warned him about touching me and throwing my keys at me hard.

All he has done all day is argue with me and scream at me and ruined my plans with my children. One min he's all apologetic and then he's a nasty cunt when he realises it doesn't wash with me anymore.

I have asked him to leave, so many times I've lost count but he won't go. He refuses. I'm going to have to leave tomorrow with my children :(

If you leave it until tomorrow, what will you do tonight? You can't really stay in the bathroom all night. You really need to check the children are ok as soon as possible.

If he's hit you once tonight and you've told him you're leaving tomorrow he's likely to be very unstable and you really can't know what he's likely to do.

He might try to talk you out of leaving, in which case you may end up staying and he'll just do it again in the future,

Or he might hit you again tonight, worse than before. I don't want to scare you but he could do something even worse. This is serious.

Please please message someone and get them to call 999 for you. They will take him away and you'll all be safe.

At the moment neither you nor your lovely children are safe from him.

Thinking of you. Look after yourselves.

Sorry. Xpost, so glad you've called.

Well done- you have done the right thing. You may get a visit from a social worker but remember they are there to help you keep your children safe. Good luck.

Well done OP you have been very brave. You have done the right thing. Sometimes the right things are the hardest

Well done, OP. you have done exactly the right thing. It's scary but you have done the bravest thing.

Tell them everything - including about disconnecting the phone/internet to isolate you and prevent you calling for help.

You and your kids can be safe from now on. Keep posting, if you can.

This is the first step to a better life for you and your children. It won't always seem like it in the next few days, weeks, maybe even months but it is. xx

Well done love.

Is there anyone that can stay with you tonight?

I'm so sorry

Yes, and please don't worry too much about SS. They are there to help you keep your children safe. You have done the right thing.

I don't know any SW who would not applaud your decision to get this violent abusive man away from you and your DC's

Well done you.

Get the locks changed and see a solicitor tomorrow.

You have done the right thing and it's really brave to do it.

I don't think changing the locks is legal if he also owns the house.

I know how hard it is. You have done the right thing.
The worst times are over now and you can get help to keep him away.

Well done OP.

They have got him in custody,they just rang me. Would you believe it, he text me saying I'd ruined his life and he was parked on train tracks :(

Police not here yet but on the way.

Didn't want to read and run, OP you have been so so brave, if there's any way we can help you and support you, you know we are all here for you. Tell the police everything so they will have a record of it.
Thinking of you and your children, stay safe

Police here. Thankyou all.

Well done.
Please don't be scared of social workers, we are only human and we are on your side.

You have not ruined anything, you know that don't you?

It's classic abuser behaviour to try to shift the blame onto the victim.

Did the police tell you he was parked on the tracks or did he?

Sounds awful, Be strong

Apparently this is what I wanted all along. He's very sorry he reacts the way he does but I make him be like that

Fuck that

You are one brave lady OP, well done for doing the right thing. Get rid. Please dont ever take him back. He has ruined his own life by being a violent bully, picking on you because you are physically weaker than him. You are his lifepartner, and this is how he treats you? & he justifies it?

Not the done thing to say so but I truly believe men like this need a good kicking from another man who whilst giving him a kicking will detail exactly why woman beaters deserve all the life hassle they get

Well done op, you have taken a very brave step tonight.
You haven't brought this on yourself. He has made this situation what it is. You deserve to live without fear of violence and your children deserve to live with their mother.

Well done OP. It's the only way to go if you are serious about putting an end to this. Forget about what he tells you, his texts, his words are all meaningless excuses and attempts at justification for doing what he does. Forget about any so called detrimental effect on his career - it's his actions that will affect his career, not yours. It's a sideshow to the central issue here - and that is he is a violent abuser.

He is using violence and emotional abuse to control you, and then he minimises and justifies it by claiming that it is you who has provoked that violence.

He will never take responsibility for his actions and he will never ever change and as of tonight it has to be made 100% clear to him that his behaviour will no longer be tolerated by you.

In your own words you tell us that that he hit you around the face, threw keys at you, grabbed you by the neck and gave you a fat lip. That's just tonight. Make it the last night he ever, ever has an opportunity to do this to you again.

So you are all safe? You have a phone with you now?

Bloody hell thank God you called the police. Best of luck to you and dcs x

Its emotional abuse OP. He is a grown man who is fully in charge of his behaviour and choices. He is still abusing you now. I always found the emotional abuse as hard or sometimes harder than the physical. Tonight is the first day of the rest of your new happier and peaceful life. Trust me when I say to you it will be the best decision you have made. There will always be tough times but nothing will ever feel as bad as it has done.