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Original poster

Am I being over worried or is this a red flag?

243 replies

Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 18:04

Been seeing my guy couple of months. We've been so happy last few weeks and even said the 'L' word to each other. We've met each other's kids and spend a lot of time together. Had an amazing last few days then yesterday I received a drunken message from an old flame on FB. The text was quite suggestive and my guy was pretty pissed off! He told the guy not to contact me again.

Since then things went downhill, I thought he seemed a bit cool and was suppose to come over tonight. He cancelled saying he going out with his sister now instead.

I just feel really upset although he says we are fine, just have a gut feeling things going wrong.

Just wondered if it me being paranoid?

OP posts:
MostWicked · 04/05/2014 22:53

Red flags all round from what I can see.

If you were looking at photos on FB, there is no reason to go to messages and read anything. Why is your ex messaging you? Why did you let your new bf reply to the message, that's just weird. Are you not capable of dealing with things yourself?

Clearly his reaction shows that the relationship isn't quite as close as you thought it was. Being that involved with the kids at this stage is not putting the kids needs first.

Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 22:53

He had the snip and I have the implant fitted fyi

OP posts:
Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 22:55

The ex messages me because he's a joke! But I've blocked him now....shame can't do that on hereHmm

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 04/05/2014 22:55

I see you're pointedly ignoring posts you no likey?no surprise
But hey you love his kids,you're stepping up to be mummy i guess you're busy
The red flag is you.your poor judgement and romantic fantasies

Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 22:56

Scottishmummy - blocked!

OP posts:
badbaldingballerina123 · 04/05/2014 22:58

If his ex wife ran off with someone else he's going to be sensitive to this sort of thing. I think anyone would be. I don't think he's controlling , I think he's concerned. Presumably you allowed him to email back on your behalf ?

Why don't you ring him tomorrow and invite him round for a chat , and reassure him that it's not a regular occurrence ? That's all you can do really.

scottishmummy · 04/05/2014 22:58

Of course,silly me.i should congratulate you the wuse choice in this 2mth relationship

scottishmummy · 04/05/2014 22:59

When,or if,you next see him.do drop the line you love his kids and are filling mummy shoes

Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 23:01

Yes badbalding I let him reply as he was angry as was I. The guy isnt even my friend on FB and I'd been ignoring him months prior to meeting new man.

I just hope he realises too as believe it or not I genuinely love him and want this to work

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 04/05/2014 23:03

neil is his mate. Just sayin'.

Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 23:03

That's why I let him read the message, because his wife cheated behind his back and I don't want him to think I'd do the same

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 04/05/2014 23:03

Scottish, you are blocked! Just like the sleazeball.

expatinscotland · 04/05/2014 23:04

With more time he may have figured this out, just speculating, naturally, as I don't know him . . .

Hissy · 04/05/2014 23:05

This can't be real, can it?

I'm horrified at the lack of care taken here! There are more flags than a Red Square Parade!

I agree with everything scottishmummy says here

She is notoriously the least hysterical and scaremongering poster on here, and if she's bothered, it really is time to open your eyes and wake up before your dc get hurt or worse.

I hope to god this is a troll. I feel sick at the prospect that it might be for real.

scottishmummy · 04/05/2014 23:05

I liked it
Best read in an alan sugar voice,oi scottish blocked

Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 23:05

Ha yes I thought that too Expat Grin

Men's point of view I guess...not as catty Hmm

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 04/05/2014 23:07

Catty or full of common sense, that is the question.

Alas, I am so glad I learned to love money more than cock.

scottishmummy · 04/05/2014 23:08

Lol,thats a belter.love money more than cock

expatinscotland · 04/05/2014 23:08

And well, this being the internet, you never know if a person posting under a male name or purporting to be male, or female, is actually so. That's the nature of 'meeting' someone online and why it is important to take one's time with them.

neiljames77 · 04/05/2014 23:09

Grin I'm not his mate!!! I'm not the ex either.

Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 23:11

Possibly my downfall expat...

OP posts:
Original poster
Hormonalhell · 04/05/2014 23:12

The ex is actually called Neil Grin

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 04/05/2014 23:14

Youre downfall may be being unboundaried,unguarded around some online guy
Hes known you face to face fir month.thats not long enough.yiu seem unconcerned
Stop mooning about trying ti be new mummy,you're not their mum,never will be

neiljames77 · 04/05/2014 23:15

Hey, pack it in. It's not me!!!!

angryangryyoungwoman · 04/05/2014 23:18

On another thread, you have stated that you lied about your age to him and he "seemed peeved " at you lying when he found out . Could it be that do you think? Personally, I would find it really scary if someone I had only known for 2 months said that they loved my kids. I would run for the hills.

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