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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

The Dating Thread 74.

999 replies

MadeMan · 04/05/2014 13:44

Hello and welcome.

OP posts:
MyChildDoesntNeedSleep · 04/05/2014 20:40

Sorry jesy do you mean 'dating' as in going out on dates, ie. you never actually 'go out' or 'dating' as in he talked about you as a couple?

Sorry if I'm being dense here...I might have had a glass of wine.

MyChildDoesntNeedSleep · 04/05/2014 20:41

Also, what was the comment?

Jarlin · 04/05/2014 20:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PinkPeanuts · 04/05/2014 20:48

Jumping on this thread as I haven't had a date since dinosaurs roamed the earth and hoping some dating vibes might rub off on me! I'm currently trying to drum up the motivation to try online dating again but it's soooo exhausting sometimes!

SuperFlyHigh · 04/05/2014 21:23

Jarlin - I've just knocked it on the head. there is no way at this early stage that I'm waiting to be texted and I've had a stressy enough day without some man I don't know making it worse.

also there were spidey senses re his last relationship, why was he with her so long when she was a coke head with kids etc?! I'm not doing that. He also told me (at age 40) that when he was out (festivals, clubs etc) that he sometimes did stuff - e.g. coke. I don't do that now, way too old and to be honest (call me Miss Judgy Pants) I think men of that age who do that now are a bit sad. even weed pisses me off.

SuperFlyHigh · 04/05/2014 21:24

Pink it is bloody exhausting. No motivation for you as yet but there are some nice men out there.

SuperFlyHigh · 04/05/2014 21:25

ha Jarlin the stubbornness re texting…

I totally get you! Smile

I was wondering I hope dont is ok and comes back. Poor love. Sad

SuperFlyHigh · 04/05/2014 21:25

snakeskin trousers eh?! Grin who is he the lizard king, himself?!

PinkPeanuts · 04/05/2014 21:35

SuperFly I can well believe that, they just never seem to be interested in me! That's pretty much the story of my dating life Sad

Jarlin · 04/05/2014 21:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SuperFlyHigh · 04/05/2014 21:48

Jarlin - even when he said "oh it's only occasionally" - I was like [shocked].

I knew men younger than that with kids, well educated who probably toyed/toy with drugs but at 40 I really start to worry as I know what a slippery slope it is.

MBB was also having acupuncture etc which is great but he'd had a rough time with his ex-GF recently. yet said he was fine. am doubtful on that score!

SuperFlyHigh · 04/05/2014 21:49

sorry Shock

theuncivilservant79 · 04/05/2014 21:51

Hello.....I am crap at keeping up with this thread sorry about that. I have nc a few times too but I was dating gap yah man.

Anyway pof is going really well this time around. I kind of have 3 guys on the go in a dating only or about to meet up with kind of a way. I have has date 1 with who I will call angsty civil servant. Date was short but pretty good and we knew a while back we had a colleague in common. She is my current colleague and slightly senior to me and his ex colleague though they worked together for many years. He told me after the date he had phoned her and said he had met me and presumably done some digging. I am really annoyed about this!!!! What's the verdict?

louby44 · 04/05/2014 22:16

OMG he turned up in black, tight fitting snakeskin trousers!! I nearly wet myself.

He looks like a tall version of Heston Blumenthal and is very quirky. His ex wife is living with someone I used to teach with years ago - lol!

He's certainly an interesting character, intelligent, READS not into football! But all these men I keep meeting I just don't click with. They aren't my ex whom I still hold a candle for and I just keep wondering whether I'm ready to be dating again!

He was a nice enough guy but.....?

neiljames77 · 04/05/2014 22:37

[grin Grin Grin sorry...... Grin Grin Grin

LizzieBelle · 04/05/2014 22:41

Oh Louby! Sorry to laugh but Ha Ha! Glad date was OK though!

Jarlin · 04/05/2014 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

neiljames77 · 04/05/2014 22:55

You lot aren't doing anything to convince me that OD is a good idea!!!!! Grin

louby44 · 04/05/2014 22:56

No mention of second date but we have text a bit since we got back.

I don't think I'd see him again...his next pair of trousers may be purple or red!!!

FolkGirl · 04/05/2014 23:35

I thought there was a Mrs James, neiljames ?

I'm back from another lovely weekend with my boyfriend. I'm starting to feel a little more comfortable. He went somewhere with a number of my friends and myself over the weekend and I know he really wasn't comfortable about doing it, but he said he'd do it because he loved me.

It's bonkers.

My exH wouldn't have done that. If he hadn't wanted to do it, he'd have caused an argument so that I ended up feeling like I didn't want to go either, or just refused outright to even consider it.

I'm really finding it a bit odd being with someone who isn't 'obviously' abusive in some way. I think I've been constantly looking for 'the catch', when, on a day to day basis, there isn't one.

He's lovely.

neiljames77 · 04/05/2014 23:43

We separated a few months ago FolkGirl.

FolkGirl · 04/05/2014 23:50

Oh, sorry to hear that Sad

It's crap, isn't it?

Wasn't suggesting you shouldn't be here btw, I did wonder if that might be the case the other day when I replied to you on another thread about online dating.

FolkGirl · 04/05/2014 23:51

posters'

Bigbird01 · 05/05/2014 00:50

pink - you and me both!

louby - ha ha the trousers, but if you like him and his company, try and see past them (not literally - that would be a bit pervy).

folk - I know how you feel. I did see someone casually for a while, but I think I scared him off because I kept assuming he would react in a way my EA ex would - then I got emotional when he was very rational and calm all the time (kind of a relief thing, I think).

Rummikub · 05/05/2014 01:41

Hello!

louby you win the thread Grin