Trip to Ibiza with the lads ffs

[Bolloctothat72]

Yes I know, let him go don't be controlling, nothing wrong with it trust him blah blah blah. My bf is 45 trying to arrange a lads holiday while the World Cup is on, clubbing drinking whatever. I didn't particularly like this when I was in my 20s but I shut up and put up for the sake of the relationship. I now I'm divorced met someone else only a year but there's always texts amongst these lads about various trips, pre stag dos here, actual stag dos there. Now flipin Ibiza I can't cope with it. I want a man , not a lad reliving his youth that won't commit. I'm fine with lads nights out weekends away even with the lads, well don't particularly like them but I'll put up with it if it makes him happy, but what about my feelings. Am I allowed to not like it none of my friends husbands/partners do this why bloody me

If I was his mates I would be pissed off with him!
Just say if your in or out on a trip, then everyone knows what they are dealing with!
Bloody tosser.

It's frustrating when people do this whether you are organising a trip to the theatre or a week in Spain it's not fair to mess people about!

All questions to ask anyfucker not out of the woods yet !

Tbh what I actually think has happened no one will go so he's not. I'm not sure and could be cynical but that is my thinking !

Oh, nice, and can I just say 41 is considered pretty young these days.

shut your cakehole, Trev, I am sooooo not lacking in a bit of sunshine

But I'll take the chance for a holiday anyway :-)

nomnomnomnom

< starts a bunfight >

Oh and flip chart hear what your saying, but I couldn't give a flying f about his mates lol they won't care about my feelings either so stuff them !

Help!

I know that but I would treat as a warning that he s quite prepared to say what suits to people. Maybe in time he will do it to you ' to stop you moaning' at some point in the future

Maybe the trip has fallen apart or he cant afford it or what ever and he is putting himself in a good light. Who knows.

Anyway, it doesn't matter, your happy!

For now I am, but I hear what your saying so I'm not completely happy flip , I will wait till Wednesday

My post came out harsh. Didn't mean it that way! Just saying be careful of people who say things just to keep others quiet and them sweet.

If it doesn't 'feel' right with you, then don't ignore those feelings or you'll just end up resenting him anyway.

DH has a group of friends he has known since high school - they keep in touch and have nights out every couple of months, which DH goes on and enjoys.

But once a year or so about half of them have a 'lads week away' - a European city somewhere for seven nights in a row of getting completely wrecked (apparently). DH has never gone and never wanted to go - he says he enjoyed his lads holidays when he was single and had nothing better to do or to spend his money on - but has no desire to try and re-live those days now.

At risk of sounding smug, I am very, very grateful that I married a grown-up and not a man-child.

Oops sorry, missed the updates OP!

laragina you do indeed sound smug.

In my experience the ones who don't go (my brother in law for one) are the ones who know they'll end up doing something stupid and don't trust themselves or aren't 'allowed' to go.

Trevor so you don't believe it's possible that a grown man with a wife and children just wouldn't want to have a 'lads' holiday consisting of seven nights in a row of getting hammered? You must have a pretty low opinion of men....

Oi! No... just said (and wasn't for a second suggesting this with regard to your DH who I of course don't know) that the only man I've ever met who doesn't jump at the chance at a boys holiday is my brother-in-law - who isn't 'allowed'. When me and DP asked him about it he said 'yeah, I'd end up doing something stupid... it's not worth it'. They've agreed between them that he goes on nights out but not away. My sister doesn't go away without him either.

Dunno if it's how much he'll drink, or how much he'll spend, or if it's something to do with women (hope not) but for whatever reason he stays well clear.

Laregina that's great, kind of what I want, if he decided on his own terms he didn't want to go that would please me no end. I have actually noticed he has slowly stopped going to so many, still having the nights out but not the away ones although he was away up north at the weekend at a football match! But I didn't mind that, so this Ibiza trip threw me a bit, but can people change not completely but you know a bit, thing is he was single for 4 years before he met me and could do what he wanted.

Btw had another text about him taking me to a hotel in march his treat, what's going on lol!

trev, I think you need to widen your social circle a bit

there are men out there who don't think it's the epitome of fun to go and get hammered for a week with a bunch of leering nobheads

I don't "disallow" my H anything, he just doesn't prioritise shit like that

if that make me "smug" so be it

is he reading this thread ?

My Dh likes drinking real ale and looking at classic cars and then wonders why I encourage him to go with his mates and not me! Lol!

Ha - I didn't call anyone smug. Just think that there are some clingy women around.

Men and women should be allowed to spend their time and money going away with their friends if and when they want. End of.
Don't really know why you're slapping the 'leering nobheads' label on a group of men you've never met by the way. Now who needs to widen their social circle . Some men are oafs. Some aren't. Some might act like one if in the wrong crowd - like my brother in law... so he stays home. Simple!

Enjoy your hotel trip OP!

haha flip yep my DP is a geek too ;-)