Is it right for a married man to be texting another woman everyday, even if its all innocent and they are just friends. ??

[fruitandbarley]

And if not, why not?

[JoinYourPlayfellows]

I dont think for one minute he'd ever have an affair

Really?

Why, what's so special about him?

What makes him immune to something that so many people find themselves tempted by?

[JohnFarleysRuskin]

Ok in your situation, I wouldn't like it either.

How long has he known this woman?

[Mojang]

I think it would be quite unusual for a man to be texting a male "mate" everyday, they just don't in the way women do, or is it just the ones I know?

If he is sending loads of texts everyday and there are other friends he texts daily too then it's perfectly normal and fine but for the men I know that would be very unusual and not so fine.

[DrNick]

my male mate and me text about ten times a day during the week

normally about work and taking the piss

[hickorychicken]

JYPf.... How cynical (sp) is that!!

[higgle]

As my DH sends about one text a year I'd be pretty surprised to find him texting anyone every day.

[skaen]

I wouldn't be keen but my DH doesn't text friends or his parents anywhere near that often so it would bd very new. He does text me everyday but just to let me know which train he's on. In our circs I would think there was a bit of an issue.

[fruitandbarley]

There is nothing special/different about him, but if I assumed all the time he would be tempted into having an affair I wouldn't have married him.

[Mojang]

How many times a day? Is it a one off "how did Jonny get on at the dentist/in his Maths test?" or is it backwards and forwards all day?

[ThatBloodyWoman]

I find that there is an absence of concern for me because my dh couldn't care less if I read his messages (or him mine for that matter).They're all stuff like 'don't forget to bring milk home'.
We don't do it 'cos we can.
If he started getting antsy about it, then I'd wonder why.

[AnyFucker]

I wouldn't force myself to be cool about this

what would he do if you said it was bothering you that much you were asking him to stop

Would he place his relationship with this woman above you, and refuse outright?

[YoureBeingASillyBilly]

I speak to my best friend every day. She could just as easily be a he best friend. Why should that be a problem for my partner if a female bestfriend isnt.

[fruitandbarley]

I'm not sure he would refuse outright but he wouldn't be happy because he dosnt believe he's doing anything wrong.
And to be fair If he asked me to stop doing something that I saw as acceptable/innocent I don't think if be happy either.
Am just confused and was looking for a wider set of opinions.

[Mabelface]

My other half texts one of several women at least once a day. They're mutual friends and there's nothing to hide.

[YoureBeingASillyBilly]

If he texts you and male best friend every day then this isnt out of character fir him to text another friend everyday.

[hickorychicken]

In regards to texts if there was 'x' or similar to sign off would that be of significance?

[badbaldingballerina123]

Does he text her more than you ? Have you seen the conversations ?

[AnyFucker]

So, if you get dozens of replies saying " my bloke texts his female friend every day," or "My best friend is a man" is that going to reassure you ?

Or would you be best to stop stifling your own gut instinct about your own relationship and act accordingly ?

[TimeToThinkOfYourFuture]

When I was doing this I was having an EA. Just saying. It all ended OK for me and DH and we are strong now (it was some years ago) but it was dangerous and it could have very easily gone too far. I would be dubious.

[LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance]

Does he share the text conversations with you. I have a friend I text several times a day. It's often very funny stuff about work and I say to DH - have a look at this it's hilarious and we look through the texts together. If I was in ANY way secretive, that would be the time to be concerned. I would happily hand my phone to DH for him to read every single text as there is nothing that crosses boundaries.

Go with your gut OP. Every time.

[Fairenuff]

I can't believe there are many people that text each other every day. Even best friends. What about Christmas Day, did he text her then.

Personally I would not be comfortable with the fact that someone was on my dh's mind that much. It seems obsessive.

[fruitandbarley]

I think it would actually go some way to reassuring me.
I do understand what your saying, but I don't think there's anything wrong with our relationship, or I would just be looking at that and working on what was wrong.
When you say act accordingly, what do you mean? Ask him to cut all contact? If so, do you think that's fair if he's got a totally innocent relationship with her?

[fruitandbarley]

He didn't know her Christmas day.

[hickorychicken]

Have u seen any msgs?

[Fairenuff]

When did he meet her?