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Original poster

He called me a 'fat cunt', then said 'just reacting to you'.......

200 replies

oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 16:24

So, followed some advice and told my OH how I was feeling about some stuff, hoping for a chat to resolve -

He went totally on the defensive and saw me as 'attacking him' (apparently), started the name calling, and I walked away -

I have put on some poundage recently, and he knows it's upsetting me, so this has really hit a nerve............

I'm not one to take offence at 'words', never have been, sticks and stones and all that, but this killed me, it was so nasty and ill placed, obviously there's never a right time to call someone this, but i'm quite hardened to certain things -

Needless to say, told him to do one, not answering the phone, nothing, I really tried with him, I did, but do not want him here right now, possibly ever, just out of order.............!!! sad, but not so much, prick!!

OP posts:
Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 19:55

He's not coming back, he's just 'sounding off' hoping I'll say 'alls okay' - and I'm not going to do that, so he can jog on.......

Police not necessary, but this 'relationship' has ended (I am lucky enough to have quite a few friends, so one bringing a bot and we having an 'i'm a celeb' duvet sesh')

OP posts:
Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 19:57

clouds thank you xxx really lovely of you x

OP posts:
BOF · 03/12/2013 19:59

Duvet sesh sounds exactly what you need, great idea. You can't beat a good friend- look after yourself and keep that phone switched off!

cloudskitchen · 03/12/2013 19:59

That last comment also ridiculous and very very controlling. It sounds like he's really stepping this up to put you in a position of vulnerability so he can step back in even more in control Hmm really feel for you x

cloudskitchen · 03/12/2013 20:01

sorry I keep crossing posts. duvet/im a celeb sounds just the thing. hope there's chocolate to Smile

pictish · 03/12/2013 20:10

Do you still disagree that this is abusive?
He's ramping it right up now isn't he?

You are doing the right thing getting shot of this nasty piece of work. What a cunt he is to say that to you. What. A. Cunt.

Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:11

clouds that's exactly what I feel he's trying to do (in the past, I've always said 'ok, no probs', ignoring everything!)

But bollocks to him, this time, he's just reinforcing the fact to me this relationship is over......

So bring on the hateful comments from him, more power to me -

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Sleepyhoglet · 03/12/2013 20:12

Oh oopsadaisy j have been following your other threads recently and feeling for you. Name calling is no way to resolve problems in a marriage I really hope he comes back and see sense and recognises how harmful and hurtful this can be.

Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:15

pictish yes, I cannot disagree, his last comment to me killed me, I went through absolute hell loosing my baby, it killed me, properly - you have no idea -

But he does -

So to use that against me is unforgivable, and i'm in tears writing this because I spent hours in that toilet screaming -

how dare he, how could he

OP posts:
Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:17

sorry

OP posts:
Joysmum · 03/12/2013 20:18

Referring to your miscarriage is unforgivable. I feel so sorry that you've had to deal with him and that but feel extremely glad you've figured it out and resolved to boot him out of your life. You do not deserve that x

Sleepyhoglet · 03/12/2013 20:19

Bastard bastard. So glad the house is all yours. Ignore him. Be glad you ended this now rather than 10 yrs down the line . You will be fine. You seem like you have your head screwed on.

Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:24

God this has killed me, why did he say that to me- just wrong

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Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:27

I'm so angry with myself for crying over this comment,

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cloudskitchen · 03/12/2013 20:29

To upset you, to hurt you and kick you down. Don't let him win. It's not true. He's vile xx

Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:34

clouds my miscarriage killed me, i looked over that toilet and screamed because I knew my baby was there, it destroyed me -

now i'm a 'baby-killer' -

god, all brought back

How fucking dare he say that to me

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cloudskitchen · 03/12/2013 20:38

((((BIGhugs)))) I'm so sorry you had to go through that and that you lost your baby. I cannot get my head around what sort of person would use that against another, a person they should protect from hurt not inflict it. That's just evil Thanks Thanks Thanks x

Lweji · 03/12/2013 20:38

You tried and you got your answer. :(

I suspect that what hurt was not the comment in itself, but that it killed the last bit of hope you had of salvaging your relationship.
It is a lot to take in.

I think you are doing very well, and reading him for who he is. Stay strong.

pictish · 03/12/2013 20:43

Because you dared broached the subject of his shortcomings within the relationship, and then didn't beg him to come home when he stormed off in outrage at your audacity. Hmm

For future reference, don't ever tolerate being sworn at and called names again. It's never anything less than completely unacceptable. It shows at total lack of respect.

I'm sweary and lairy...but I would never shrug off being called a fat cunt by my so called partner. That's appalling. He thinks he can just say whatever what he likes to you, the fucking rat!

I am so sorry that he went on to say what he did. I'm sorry that you're hurting...but if nothing else you can be under no illusion as to what he is.

Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:43

what hurt is now i cant get the image out of my head, that 'clot' in the toilet was my baby - oh fucking hell, the ONE thing he KNEW!

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mathanxiety · 03/12/2013 20:45

Oops, sorry to add more sadness to your horrible day, but this man has:
No feelings for you at all --
No love.
No respect.
A huge amount of anger and hostility.
Judging by his texts he actually despises you, and the only reason he would come back is to keep on kicking you in the teeth because that is what he is in this relationship for.

I really hope you are going to be strong enough to take that on board and do what is necessary to shut him out of your life.

Don't be angry with yourself for crying.
Cry all you need to. Lots of shoulders here to cry on, and lots of good advice too.

When you have cried yourself out and when your friends are there, would you have the strength to pack his things? Would the friends help you?

You could put his stuff in black bags.

Original poster
oopsadaisyme · 03/12/2013 20:46

Yes, will now turn my phone off, too much for me, -

Sorry, just venting

sorry

OP posts:
mathanxiety · 03/12/2013 20:47

No need to say sorry.
You are among friends.

Lweji · 03/12/2013 20:48

Yes, it's better. No need for further aggro. And let your friends read any messages and delete them before you do.

AnyFuckersfrogslegs35 · 03/12/2013 20:51

oopsadaisyme
I hadn't read your other thread when I posted here earlier.
I have now Shock
Commenting about your weight was bad enough but to blame you for your mc is utterly vile, I'm so sorry.
I hate this word but feel it's suitable, CUNT! - that's what he is and you are well rid of him.
Take care of yourself and stay strong.