Dating thread 62 .. All welcome

[Kirstywirsty]

The Rules

1. Develop a thick skin;
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon;
3. It's all BS until it actually happens;
4. Trust your gut instinct;
5. People vanishing, lying and being generally weird to you are not your fault
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you
7. If it's not fun, stop
8. loo update is mandatory

Wine See i know logically and would see it with anyone else but if im so lovelt, where are my friends? Why do I have to dread the mini cab ride home from any minor op which i think sums up some of my lows, spend birthdays alone and right now the only friend I could visit has been 'busy' in the past.

You're not impossible, love.

It sounds like a horrible combination of exhaustion (you said it all in the third sentence of your first post) and stress. It's very stressful having someone to stay, even someone lovely. I must confess I dread visitors coming here. If you're a bit of an introvert like me then you need time alone to recharge and get yourself on an even keel, and things can get very difficult and stressful if you're not able to do this. It's different if you're living with someone of course because then there's not that ghastly pressure to "entertain" which is always there with guests,even if it's very low key, and it's not bad manners to slope off and do your own thing for a while.

Could you have a day/half day apart tomorrow maybe?

It's very difficult for you two (as well as also being lovely in other ways) as circumstances mean you spend great chunks of time together right from the start, instead of building up to this over months of dating. Unusual circumstances but not impossible! And just adjusting to being in a relationship can be a bit tricky too let alone all the other stuff.

Just to repeat, though, lovely, it's not you. You're not impossible. You're wonderful in many ways, please don't forget that. Sending you love and hugs.

Oh aye, Wine and Juliette I 'lost' the person I considered to be my best friend, ex SIL, with the end of my marriage but it forced me to see what a shabby excuse for a friendship that had been, she had never given a shiny shit about me. A lot of friendships are like that, vaporising when times get tough, they're not worth investing any effort in anyway.

Right you're all going to have to stop now! Just had to taken unscheduled break at work because you set me off crying again - sympathy and vodka always makes me cry!

I will make the fb connections when back home. But for now please accept my huge gratitude - I have always relied on the kindness of strangers

Supposed to have a date at 4pm, babysitter booked.
Discussed a couple of venues didnt make a final decision. Text him a couple of hours ago "still ok for 4, Costas or pub?"
Not heard a thing back, its less than an hour off now. He did say he was busy this aft and he chose 4pm but not even time to text? It's not happening is it? Babysitter will be here in 20 mins. I'm sat in my dressing gown waiting to get ready.
This is why I have been single for years. I don't need the hassle of being let down.
Any ideas what else I should do with my 3 hours of freedom?

Definitely use it! Go for a run? See a film you've been wanting to see? Go to a lovely cafe with a good book and enjoy some alone time cake?

And if he stands you up he's an arsehat, but you know that.

Ss will you be my FB friend too?

At time like this I wish I could run!

Off to tesco, how bad is that? The best I can think of is a peaceful trip round tesco with no one saying "can I have.." every 17 seconds.

OWW yea to the introvet thing and visitors. I need time to myself. I have sent visitors away before now. O dont entertain, i dont know how to do it. Im sittong on my lical park, 10 silk cut and a bride and groom have just turned up for photos ffs.

You all talk sense but the fact remains that Im impossible to talk to sometimes. If the situation were reversed id say ltb but i think I could be the b. i forgave Dutchie for a huge breach of trust now months ago, he promised never again and has kept his word. Me otoh, just cant stop myself.

Juliette I'm guessing that pretty much everybody is impossible to talk to sometimes, I know for a fact that I can be a grumpy, stubborn, anti-social, unreasonable, monosyllabic git ( feel free to dispute that everybody) but that's just people. Honestly. I speak the the truth.

Wine 20 ? Bloody hell

Well pof has been an experience. About 3 potentials but inundated with the angsty scary men that go mental if you don't reply fast enough and go on how it's all women's fault! What's that about?

Flo thats soooo rude and I can relate to the being single over being let down where are their manner?

SecretService has just asked me to tell you all thank you so much for the messages, and she'll read and reply properly when she's finished work.

Out tonight with lovely, lovely Alpha. So excited, can't wait to see him. Of course today is the day I wake up with a huge spot in my chin ffs. I've really missed this man, he's missed me too. This whole thing is amazingly good and none of the horrible churning anxiety I had with LM. This is just really easy and lovely. Trying to keep a cool (ish) head but it's not working too well

Have a fantastic time with Alpha tonight OWW

I've resisted the urge to text him along the lines of him having no manners etc but I haven't, which for me is a bloody miracle!

Secret, glad you're feeling better.

Snape, a big "Woohoo!!!!" for Miss Snape. You must be so proud, especially after a tough time like that.

Wine, are you feeling just a little bit dirty now?

Nora, that's a perfect description of me, so I'm sure you can't be like that as well.

Juliette, I get The Rage sometimes. It's usually when I'm down about something and hormonal at the same time. Dutchie will understand when he sees the old Juliette again.

Ham and Flo, I'm afraid it's all par for the course. There are good and bad experiences with OD.

OWW, enjoy, lovely.

Yes to meet up, you lot have been amazing throughout everything this year, and gave me the courage to start dating again last year. Agree with the idea of it being via some form of FB or meet up group, so that it's kept to posters (though not just the frequent/regular ones).

I am entertaining at home this evening. Why the fuck did I say I'd cook?

Flo - this was the guy you had a good date with, texted him for a second one and he said yes - and now he's just gone silent?

Leave it. He's obviously a bit of a dick if he's going to do that.

Next time (next bloke), I suggest don't text first though - leave him to do the running