Is this an accusation?

[HoopersGinger]

In a long distance relationship for a year. I guess I have been a bit cool with the texts this week as I am a bit strung out alone with the kids off school and don't feel particularly into " sexting". I guess I would feel a bit of a prick if I sent a sexy text and my partner ignored it but that is what I did last night. I basically read it and fell asleep.

Today he texted and said I have let him down. He wants the sexy girl back he fell in love with and he said to be honest I am acting like I am seeing someone else. I have been cool this week as having doubts about him in general. I suppose it is fair he has picked up on this but is it out of order to accuse me of seeing someone else? We have texted and chatted most days but I haven't innitiated this.

Twinkle I forgive you

So he kept splitting up with you (nothing has changed) and was moody (nothing has changed).

He's just the lesser of two evils isn't he?

I guess so. Apart from that killer of chemistry.

Fanks

Jesus, that sounds exhausting! You'd be far less tired on your own!

They are both fucking nuts lovely.

Being single is bloody awesome, by the way, once you get the hang of it

I think I kind of am. I know it sounds like I am not but my friends tell me little things their husbands do, like complain about certain friends etc and get sulky. I think I could not be arsed with that full time. Even deciding to shop late and give the kids their tea at the supermarket pleases me because I just can. I mean I am generally a single mum of 4 with no family closer than 3 hrs drive so its not like I doubt I can do it.

I mean I think I am maybe getting the hang of it. . Just recently there has been this whole new future looming

Honestly Hoopers, you are actually doing a great job of managing on your own already , it's what you do every day. All you'd be losing is the hassle of having one more person to try and keep happy, after a week of running round after your children. And tbh I bet your kids are more mature and less moody than this man.

The 'cheating' , as you describe it , doesn't sound to me like the typical model of cheating where one partner is deceived by the other. Sounds to me like you moved on after being repeatedly dumped by X , but he didn't like you taking charge of your own life and decided to call it cheating because you stopped begging him to come back when he dumped you.

You really don't owe either of these men anything. You don't have to choose the least awful of two horrible men. You can choose to clear a space in your life to make your own happiness rather than choose an abusive man who thinks you exist to serve his needs.'Chemistry' is him being non- abusive for just long enough to make you think there's a chance of a loving partnership.

I'm a bit confused as to which man is which but...

bat shit crazy controlling narcissist who made mine and my family's lives a crazy nightmare worthy of Emmerdale including DV while pregnant when i wAs with him then a FB profile of me as a child abuser, harassment and stalking, abduction, hacking and bugging

holy christ on a skateboard, why would anyone stay with someone like that? That is not a loving relationship.

Sorry for the confusion, but after 14 harassment warnings, a restraining order and a no contact order from the family court. . . That one seems to be out of our lives.

I hope so. He sounds unhinged.

Absolutely but you would never have known it at the start. Only red flag was he was too perfect.