My marraige is over...

[Lemmingswife]

I know it is for the best, but I am hurting really bad atm & keep thinking of my poor babies.

would that be the vitamin e one?swear by it meself.Seriously though LW,are you doing ok?whens he going?

Can't remember, just know it is meant to reduce fine lines & I see lines round my eyes when I smile, which my £22.50 Clinique stuff did NOT shift!
Am up & down atm. Yesterday was pretty heavy & I felt all over the place. It was the first time that I sat in the room with the counsellor & thought "I need to get out of here" half way through the appointment!
Got through it though.
Hoping he is going in around 9 days time, as this is when his friend comes back.
He is out tonight, so I will have peace. Dreading the w/e though. I don't like w/e's much atm.

take heart a little-my dp is currently out,the first mere hour i have had "off"for about 2 weeks!the bugger is her all the time!

ABsolutely exotic enough Shibori!

LW we are all still here at the weekends and my support seems to be chatting on here these days too! So I will keep you company.

Thanks, GF.
Think I best start a new thread, as this one is now ridiculously long!
Going to go & get my hair chopped before H goes out tonight.

Lets have a poll-we have a DV thread()how about something lighter hearted,cheer us up like?

blimey seems like one of the biggest chat threads on this site is about ending of marriage....thats positive

hence the idea of a chat thread to cheer us up!

The boozers thread was longer-were on the sequel now!

oh dear. are there any truely happily married people around?

apparently,are you?

Not wishing to claim this when so many of you are going through hell at the moment, but I must say that I am happily married. Very much so and, reading all your threads, I thank my lucky stars that I found such a decent and lovely chap.

There are some out there - and the best are not always taken. Dh was 34 when I married him, so keep looking girls.

Good-tell him!x

im under the impression the nice ones are either married or gay,

Oh I do. He's a fantastic dad too. I just wish my boys appreciated how great he is.

That is lovely to hear, Freckle.

Chocolatemummy, I am very aware that this thread is mega long now, but MN has been my main source of support throughout all my problems with H & more than ever now that we have agreed to seperate.
My parents are not only unsupportive, but are making me feel like a really bad person for doing what I am doing & I keep things quite close to my chest in RL, so do not confide in many people around me. MN has been a real lifeline for me.
I guess this thread is so long because not much is changing, so cannot start a thread titled "He has left" yet, because things just don't seem to be moving on.
I will start a new thread though.
tyedye, feel free to start a happier thread!

But thankfully it does seem that we are in the minority, as most MN'ers seem to be with lovely men.

I will think of a title-bound to be very cynical though!

Why not just call it "My crappy marriage is over - hurrah!!"

I'm with Freckle. After a horrid time 5 years ago, I'm happily married to a kind and thoughtful chap & we have a lovely DS. Having been with a bd previously just makes me appreciate DH's qualities all the more.

Have to say that I had to kiss a lot of frogs before I met my prince, but I think the whole experience made me very aware of the little "alarm bells" that can go off early in a relationship (and which retrospectively are usually easy to see ).

In the period between leaving my X and meeting DH, one wise(-ish) old guy - who had been unhappily married twice before meeting his current wife of 20 odd years - advised me to take my time before rushing into another serious relationship. His less-than-poetic metaphor went along the lines of "we spend more time test driving various models of car before we commit to making a purchase - it should be the same before we marry someone" (or summat like that). Fairly obvious, but important to bear in mind. I think also that some time to heal and find yourself (sorry if that sounds corny) is really important. Once you have got shot of your ex, make sure you hook up with old friends and think about achieving things that you always wanted to do, but were discouraged from trying before - whether that be learning a new language, visiting a new place, setting up a business, whatever.

Hope you manage to have a good weekend. Take care.

Smellen-sorry ,but you have so got to write a book!

Thanks - maybe one day I will. I kept a diary throughout the whole thing - some vague ideas of one day cannibalising the whole crap marriage experience and getting something rewarding out of it! But then, now I don't think so much of those days - only really starting thinking back on it because I read one of LW's messages and felt for her. It is a horrible time, and it feels like your world has fallen apart - but it will get better.

Thank you, smellen.
Your posts always describe how I am feeling perfectly, but I guess having been there, you are very in tune with the roller coaster of feelings that I am going through atm.
The words that old man said to you were very wise. I know that I had such poor self esteem when I was younger that I flitted from one relationship to another, albeit often unhealthy relationships.
I like to think I am older & wiser now and can tell you for certain that I will not be looking for another relationship for a very long time!