Is this normal/should I be concerned - DW polishing the pearl regularly, but sex is once a month at most?

[Matt77]

We're both in our mid-thirties, married ten years, one DD (aged 3). My wife is masterbating on average once a week, but we're having sex once a month on average (13 times this year!) ... my advances (once or twice a week) are pushed away. I need advice ... should I just accept this as normal / should I be doing something to differently?

yes. imo it was fairly obvious early on that posters thought "here we go" and posted accordingly. a genuine poster, regardless of sex, would not have got that response.

so many trolls about at the moment, its crap.

Alis, I shall order that book, forthwith

I am fully able to admit when I've been a stupid arse. A plus point?

Indeed

We've all been there...

I shouted at everyone on a thread a couple of days ago because they had misread the OP. Then I looked back at the OP and realised how easy it was to read it the way they had.

I completely missed a vital part of an OP the other day and was mortified! I mean honestly wanted the floor to swallow me up! I apologised though,profusely.

I have done that several times, Alis. Or come on far strong and misjudged a situation.

Double standards on MN . General nastiness towards men. OP this is not the forum for sensitive/ sensible advice for you.
Sorry.
I am ashamed on behalf of MN

Give over, Feck

You think this is a real poster ? I think your brains must have fallen out.

I was wondering that too AF.

But leaving that point aside, I don't see that the response has been OTT. The OP gave no background details beyond a) his wife was pleasuring herself and b) not having sex with him. It is entirely possible that this is caused by him being a shit lover with bad breath or whatever, so it is entirely reasonable to point out this possibility. Harsh but fair.

It is true that there is a double standard. When women complain of the same thing on MN the normal reply is to assume porn use or an affair. It is never assumed that the man has simply got fed up with seven years of grunting and groaning in the dark while his wife lies there like a corpse. It is wrong - but it is not the scenario presented by the OP.

Brains fine thanks .
Double standard stands whether poster real or not

Mumsnet...the clue's in the name. By Parents for Parents...I take that to mean for women who are parents.

There are plenty of "Poor Me" sites for men, and for men who are parents, on t'internet.

When women are no longer judged by double standards, then maybe I'll start worrying about men.

Feck, the "double standard" only stands if the situation is real. Made up scenarios don't count, or else we would all be frothing at the mouth at no end of fantastic situations. I say, keep brain in gear and think why this poster might be posting what they are, then answer accordingly.

I agree with that, AF.

I notice there are also a few male posters who seem to ship up on every thread they can to justify past crappy behaviour, in the guise of political debate, too.

Yes, five, I notice that a lot too. One wonders how they found Mumsnet, and why they come back time and time again to tell us what we are doing wrong.

I agree. I really resent this "anti-male" name that is iven to posters who refuse to pander to the men who troll our forum. I love men. My best friend is one, I'm raising one, I married one. I respect them and enjoy their company. But they don't post stirry shite on the internet or try to get women to share details of their sex lives, and they respect women.

Damn right they don't post shirry shit on a female dominated website and pop up only on the sex/sex industry threads, BlameIt. Because that would be a bit dodgy, wouldn't it ?

Exactly, Well said.

Yep, anyone would think they have an agenda.

Toad
Nothing wrong with that - Prince Albert didn't complain, not with all the children he had with Queen Victoria " lying on her back and thinking of England". More admirable than thinking " Now what duties do I have to perform tomorrow and what shall I wear".

how do you know they are not real?
FOr the second time, my brain is fine thanks

I'm guessing that you can't log in because you are banned.

Why did you choose a site predominately used by women to discuss female masturbation and your sex life? I wouldn't use dh's football forum to ask about periods.

Blame

If he was banned for trolling, then he is a troll. Its not rocket science. And I stand by my question.