Bizarroville!! PoshBoys, Muppets, Surgeons, nurses, coffee addicts and RL - dating thread 27!

[lubeybooby]

Roll up roll up get yer dating chat here... all kinds of dating...

Online, RL, established, new, join in and blether away!

moving, you know what, you dont actually sound happy at all.
its like you are trying to convince yourself that its all ok.

You dont have to settle for anything less than you want, there is nothing wrong with wanting more than you are getting from him,

You can bring it up with him, and its up to him to act on it or not.

But why be with somone when its not right? whats the point in that?

I dumped the pirate because it wasnt right, he hadnt done anything wrong, and i could still be seeing him if i wanted too... but i wouldnt have been totally happy, he wasnt right for me.

i refuse to settle and be with someone that isnt right for me.

questions. (Hello!) I'd like to see him again, definately, but I'm not going to obsess about it or send him a text or message or whatever. We clearly liked each other, but I'm not sure if he liked me. it was a nice first date, I can certainly contemplate fucking him until he begs for mercy or dies of dehydration kissing him, but we'll see.

watch. So pleased work is good, fingers crossed for house! Yes, might have to rename him Sirius minchin if he sticks around....

bant hurry up! HURRRRRRRRRY UP!!!

moving. Glad he liked the massage. If your sex drives re ill-matched, but everything else is good then you just have to work out if the lower libido is compensated by all the other nice things. Generally, when people first start having sex they have LOTS of sex dont they? (Or is that just me?)

No, they DO have lots and lots of sex.

Horrible ex didn't and ultimately ended up using/withholding sex as a means of control and general twattery. Would be a bit wary if you're so mismatched and frustrated at this stage, Moving - it ain't gonna get any better. Big question is, is it worth putting up with in the light of the whole relationship?

Bugger - in the time it took me to post I missed 6 others!

watch The going out thing sounds great. Aside from the desperate need of an income, I keep hoping that a new job will also mean an opportunity to meet new hot men people. Lucky you.

mercury charming (blurgh)

moving I'm glad he loved his surprise but sounds like you're working really hard and still not quite getting what you want.

bant need more details please (!!!!)

Yoga, it IS great.
honestly, ive tried for so many years to find people to go out with. I can find people to go to the cinema, but they want to go and come straight home. I can find people for gigs. But thats always travelling, so not local.
I can find people for a meal, but thats usually some occassion, and there and home again.
All my other socialsing is done in friends homes. which is fine, but doesnt help if you are tying to meet new people. Ive tired to get people to go out, but they dont see the point
i never get to go to the pub with friends. this is very exciting.

Now, i just need to get the house and maybe 2013 will be a good year for me.

watch I do wonder if I am settling. I think the thing is with mr w, he has been in my life for two years so quite a while, we get together and never actually give it a proper go, then stop seeing each other and it all begins again. so this time I am trying. I have never actually tried with him before and thats why there never seems to be an end to our relationship.

I was the same with dd's dad, and after 7 years, gave it my all with him, it didnt work out so we broke up and that was it, I've never got back with him since then.
I do have feelings for mr w and find it hard not to be with him, so I just want to try to make it work once and for all, if it doesnt then move on. but if it does it could be great. (if he can stay awake long enough to enjoy it with me).

Just received a first message from Bighughsie on okc saying he could really see himself having a relationship with me. If that is the best I can do then someone shoot me please!

Bantam - awaiting more details eagerly!

Snape - fingers crossed DCs won't be an issue now you've met, I'm sure your charm will overcome his anxieties!

Mercury - the worrying thing is that some women may actually respond to such twatheads!

Sponge - good to see you feeling mired positive.

Yoga - sounds just like my ex, narcissistic twit.

Ok. When we finally got to meet an hour and a half later than planned, it was good. Shook hands rather than the slightly forced hug or cheek kiss, slight awkward moment as she was going for the hug. But no biggie. Coffee (small c) ensued, then a walk arm in arm in the south bank, stopping to ooh and aah at some performers. Got a meal and chatted, lots of eye contact, but she was very nervous. More walking, held hands for a bit then she went back to linked arms. Had a horrible moment when her DD phoned and surreygirl was saying 'does it need stitches? Is it still bleeding?' and I wasn't sure if it was a cop-out call, which I've experienced before, but luckily not. Back to the station 4 hrs later and I said 'yeah I probably shouldn't say this during the date but I'm probably going to phone you and ask for another, you don't have to say anything to that' and she said 'yeah I'm probably going to say yes'

I like her. She has ishoos with her ex being a tosspot, and never having the kids stay over with him. And she's miles away from me but doesn't get much time free so it'll have to go slowly.

So. Advice needed. What's the ideal time between date and text/call to propose a second. Quick enough to seem keen but not needy?

Oh and I walked her to her train platform and went for a quick kiss goodbye, she demurred at first then a quick kiss. No alcohol for either if us so no big passionate snogs.

snape I also have alot of sex when first with someone. but we have been on and off for 2 years. I still want lots of sex now. but after speaking with a friend we are thinking guys dont seem to want alot these days. Is it because they are getting older and less able???

Ha ha - sorry just interuppting to say "You've got Mail" is telly! Oh the irony

Hmm Moving mine is 45 and he's surprisingly erm able!

Bantam glad it went okay. Do you think that ole spark was there? I wouldn't really worry about timing as, really, you've already asked her and she's said yes, but tomorrow would be fine. Or tonight if that's what you want to do. Just go with it.

yoga I agree, alot of work is going on my end.

Bantam date sounds lovely, but wondering if all the hassle with the trains makes the distance thing seem even more daunting? You should def text her tonight to say you had a great time today but don't necessarily have to plan date 2 immediately..?

Getting great "email" from the Engineer. I told him what I was listening to in the car on the way home. He says I sound like a bit of a rock chic and has offered to play his guitar for me.

Oh the spark was there for me, I think for her but as I've learned you can't tell till you find out.

what I'm thinking is maybe people look for different things in a relationship. I want someone that wants to do fun things together like going to nice places etc. who also likes to stay in and have cuddles on the sofa (but awake not sleeping) and lots of naughty sex as much as possible. is that too much to ask??

the thing is, I find that I have a higher sex drive then all the guys I've slept with apart from dd's dad. some guys cant keep up atall. some try to make a effort to keep and and keep me happy (one I can think of who I just didnt click with but he tried really hard)

and mr w who when we have sex it works so well and I love it, but there is no where near enough for me right now.

Have you actually said to him that you'd like more?

bant - sounds good :) id go for tomorrow evening....

moving - people do want different things, its finding someone thats compatiable with what you want. If not its not going to work and one or both of you are going to end up unhappy

These posts are depressing me, I miss sex so much!

And Bantam, I'd say text today to say how much you enjoyed the date but give it a day or two to organise next date.

moving it doesn't sound like you are convinced, that niggling doubt might eat away at you. As others have said you shouldn't settle for less than what makes you happy :)

snape (hi!) Well he won't know what he'll be missing out on if he doesn't get in touch and that's his loss ;)

bant's update is eagerly awaited!

not this time around no. He knows I like alot of sex. the last time we were seeing each other I used to talk to him about it, and he said that he didnt see it as an issue, and if I just tried to have sex with him instead of talking about it then it would be more likely to happen. but when i was talking about having lots of sex all the time it put him off. which I can undersatnd as I used to feel like that with dd's dad. he constantly wanted to have sex and it used to annoy me.

New thread poised... get ready...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1609755-Ginny-pigs-prove-the-options-are-of-limited-quality-Dating-thread-28