To stop making my OH an evening meal even though he works 60hour weeks and I'm a SAHM ?

[ladywithnomanors]

I don't think I am.
I'm a SAHM to a 2, 4 and 6 yo DC's. He often works 60 hour weeks and sometimes 7 days a week. I do everything in the house and with the DC's - except he cuts the back lawn and occasionally puts the bins out.
I cook him a meal every night for when he gets home from work - often a different meal to what I cook for the DC's as he doesn't consider pasta, jacket potatoes, shepherd's pie to be a proper meal ie. it doesn't consist of a huge chunk of meat.
Whatever I serve up he criticises it. I made a curry it was 'flavourless' even though he specified which curry powder to use. I make a roast chicken and it's 'dry' or the potatoes are hard. Apparently my rice is mushy and my meat 'overcooked'. He comes in at night, waliks into the kitchen and wrinkles his nose at the pans bubbling on the stove, ' Mmm what delights do we have tonight??' he says in a sarcastic tone.

Ok I'm not the worlds best cook but I'm not the worst either and I do try. He says I don't as I'm not serving up Masterchef cuisine every night. He very occasionally will say he enjoyed something.

This morning I mentioned that we had sausages in the fridge and so would do the DC's sausage, mash and veg for tea and did he want some making. He response was that he didn't as he used to like sausages until I made them for him and now the thought of them make him retch. I told him that if that was his attitude then I wasn't going to cook for him anymore as he was ungrateful and picky.
I should point out that he is a fantastic cook but hardly cooks as he works so much.

So AIBU to stop cooking and just let him fend for himself and get his own tea when he gets in from work?

No.

I can see why you are annoyed but I do think YABU to stop cooking for him, a 60 hour week at work to provide for the family does in my opinion deserve a meal cooked. I would however not be cooking specific meals for him, it would be the same as everyone else and he could take it gratefully and without complaint!

No. You are working hard too. Stop cooking for him, he sounds ungrateful, rude and sexist.

YANBU.

Ungrateful swine.

But really, how bad is your cooking? Do the DC like it? Do friends quake when you offer to knock them up a sandwich?

I would offer to keep him some of what you/dc's are having. If he doesn't want it he can make his own or go without.

YANBU and your OH sounds like an ungrateful git to be honest. The fact that you are going out of your way to make a whole other meal because he won't eat what the rest of the family eats makes it worse. I'd say you can eat what me and the DCs eat or make something yourself and see how he likes that!

When I saw the thread title I was ready to storm in and say YWBU, but having read your post YADefinitelyNBU. He has two choices - take the meal that you cook for the family or make his own.

agree with lisad1. would you prefer to be a SAHM or work? if its the latter, why don't you suggest a swap next time he complains.

He sounds horrible.

If he moans that much about what you cook YANBU.

YADNBU.

Maybe do as Lisa says then its no extra effort.

What a twat. Leave a pot noodle (un made) out on the side for him.

As if you would criticise his work, the cheek!

He is so fecking rude!

Tell him you won't be cooking for him anymore, as apparently it is so awful

I'd be telling him he can either eat what you serve him without criticism or cook for himself when he gets home and that includes clearing up afterwards or bring home his own take away!

You aren't his employee! He sounds rude, entitled, spoilt and nasty.

Yanbu, why cook for him if he doesn't want to eat it.
Yabu, to cook another meal for him.
I would make extra, and that's what dh would have.
My dh is a chef, a Damn good one, he would never be so horrible about my cooking, despite my skills in the kitchen being below par (imo).
If he is home for dinner and I cook he has the same. He see the effort that I have gone to and is grateful even if his version would have been better/different. He always says its great and thank you. He has never made me feel that shit. Its me that knows I can't cook as well as him. Its just a fact.

YANBU. I would stop cooking for him on the grounds that he is a twat. I don't cook for twats.

Ordinarily I would say YABU as he's obviously working long hours and (in normal families) it's not much effort to adapt or cook more of the DC's dinner for the adults' meal. But in your case I say YANBU - your DH sounds very critical of you - it's almost like you can't do anything right regarding his meals. Let him fend for himself or encourage him to cook and freeze his own meals in advance (eg at weekends). Is he this much of an arrogant pr**k in other aspects of your married life?

FWIW, my DH also works very long hours but most nights he doesn't even expect me to provide a meal for him - he either eats at work or he rustles up an omelette or defrosts something when he gets back (usually once I'm already in bed).

When he come h

YANBU at all. He's using food as a cover to being really vile to you.

Does he have anything at all positive to say about all the other aspects of running the home and bringing up the kids that you do? Or is he often this rude to you?

I do think YABU to stop cooking for him, a 60 hour week at work to provide for the family does in my opinion deserve a meal cooked

I don't care if he's working down a mine for those 60 hours, I wouldn't cook for him as I wouldn't put up with the sarcastic comments. He can pick up a take away on the way home!

I wouldn't want to keeping cooking, you could both be doing a 60 hour week asyou are looking after the dc when he is working. So I don't see why he can't cook - maybe he doesn't want to cook, but doubt you want to cook with remarks like this all the time.

I would let him know you will be expecting him to take his share in the kitchen and cooking delights for you to sample.

And if he's such a fantastic cook what's wrong with him making a few meals at the weekend which you freeze and use during the working week?

When he come home tonight present him with the local take away menu and tell him he can organise his own dinner.