Chutney Twunt pt 3

[LouP19]

Back again, is this a record? How many threads can this bastard have? You are all keeping me going this afternoon - you and friends on email and friends on text. It's keeping me angry which is good.

what porto said.

sometimes, when you get copy keys, they are carelessly made and don't quite fit.

You can be worried about him taking the cats without thinking he's an evil, vindictive potential cat killer. I think the advice about the microchips is good.

I've been a bit worried about him taking the cats from the start TBH, just because Lou said he was asking after them a lot. He could want to take them for the (relatively) innocent reason of wanting them himself.

PigletJohn these Keycutters aren't as good as they used to be are they?

Agree he's not a kittykiller but might just try napping them.... so worth getting them chipped, it's just the sort of pathetic thing he'd bring up in court as he has (guess what?!) nothing else against you,

Hopefully Lou in approximately 30 ish hours time you WILL have a forwarding address for chutney twunt

Another lurker here.
Bloody hell Lou! What an absolute chunt he is!
You have handled this brilliantly, and I think that the best thing for you to do now is to make full use of your solicitor and take him for all the chutney he's worth!

Go, Babylon, Go BABYLON, Go GO GO!!!

The way I read this, from the info Lou has given, is that:

Twuntney had an affair, got the OW pregnant and then dealt with this in a highly cowardly way, by moving all his stuff out when Lou was at work. He meets Lou to say he has been having an affair and OW is pg. He is shocked by Lou's announcement that she too is PG and is apparently relieved that nothing is wrong with either of them. Strange as Lou has been pg, and he knows full well OW is. He gets the mail redirected. He goes to his house to collect his mail that had been delivered previously and other belongings, presumably believing Lou to be at work. He sees a solicitor. He continues to pay all the bills and the mortgage (and the cat insurance). He texts Lou to say that he loves her and didn't want to hurt her.

I can NOT see where some of the death defying leaps of projection and assumptions about his cruel and evil intentions have come from, apart from some posters imaginations. There is NO evidence he is trying to prevent Lou from seeing a solicitor for example. There is no evidence that he is trying to get control and has evil intentions. Not even Lou has any idea about his intentions. Lou might be upset because he went in the house when she wasn't there - but he is an arse who obviously didn't stop to consider her feelings. There is no evidence he wants to steal or kill the cats.

Some of the posts on this thread are hysterical and projecting the posters imagination on to the situation. The best way to support Lou is to provide practical info on her legal situation and help support her through the forthcoming scan. Not to get all carried away and say "oh he probably is/thinks that" or "oh, he might do that, evil bastard" Just stick to the FACTS and deal with each day as it happens.

Good luck with your scan, and the search for the new solicitor Lou.

QuietTiger, you do indeed speak from experience. What a terrible story about the vet visits.
No-one is saying that will happen here: none of us know.
It pays to be aware is what QT is saying, I think?

I hope today hasn't been too bad Lou. Good luck to Babylon- hope she gets all the information you need.

Portofino - I'm not saying that Lous ex will kill her cats.

I am saying that from my extensive experience (18 years in rescue & working on prosecution cases with the RSPCA in a professional capacity), I have seen cats taken to the vets 3 times for PTS by a vindictive partner and more issues of control over pets than I can count. I'm telling her she needs to be aware of the cats safety as they are the one thing that cannot be replaced and I'm also telling her how to protect them legally so that they remain with her.

Pets are used by vindictive partners as a control & blackmail mechanism to keep people in line and get them to do things they otherwise wouldn't.

I agree with Porto actually. He IS a wanker of the highest order, but I think some people are getting a little carried away. I hope Lou can continue to get support and sensible advice here, as so far I think she's dealt with all the shit he's thrown at her remarkably well.

Glad to hear you rearranged some furniture to give it your own stamp - that's a very positive step. Sorry to hear you are having a bit of an up and down day - very understandable.

Can't see him taking the cats - what would dog-owning OW think if he suddenly turned up with two pre-owned kitties? Paying the insurance and asking after their welfare fits in with his vision of himself as a lovely human being - "see how nice I am? I even paid the cats' insurance before I left."

His parents sound like they are at least half of the cause of his horrible nature to be honest. He sounds like he might have been one of those spoiled kids who could never do a thing wrong in his parents' eyes - total approval and encouragement for any kind of grabby, rude, disgraceful behaviour - and this has turned him into an entitled, selfish, immoral adult who still basks in the support of his mum and dad. They can't cope with the emotional discomfort of admitting they might have raised this poor excuse for a human being, so the just keep on cheer-leading his disgusting antics.

To his twisted way of seeing things, he may win some minor battles, (chutney, meat, eyeing up the Denby) but the might of the law should ensure that he loses the financial war.

Good luck with your various appointments this week - I really admire the way you are handling things and wish you well.

QuietTiger - but my point is that there no evidence that he is being vindictive - weak and cowardly, yes, vindictive, no. So getting Lou worried about her beloved cats is not exactly helping. He bought food for them, he paid their insurance, he has asked after them....

Chutney, another lurker here, wishing you well.

Can I ask whether your shitty ex's new partner has a house??

I just ask because my own sister in law (h's sister) had a very acquisitive cheating ex.

He left with OW after he had beaten her up for daring to object to his affair, and after the neighbours came to her rescue and called the police.

He too consulted heaps of solicitors, so she couldn't find one easily.

What he did next was truly staggering.

She fled for that week to her sisters, because she was understandably upset and needed company and some help with the kids whilst she absorbed the shock. She was also a bit worried for her safety. So he very prompted moved his OW in, who, can you actually believe, chucked out alot of her stuff and repainted her bedroom and bathroom!!!!

It took months to get hi out again.

I just think that men like your ex have absolutely no scruples, and that they can be trusted in no way with property of any kind.

I've been lurking, and have be inspired with your courage so far.

But, re the cats/access to the house. I'd be increasingly worried about this, at the very least. It is all about control. He has let himself in to your home, stolen joint property, and clearly feels he can and will do this again whenever he wants.

He doesn't need to have the cats at the lovenest, he can place them elsewhere remember, and I would not be at all surprised if he was considering this. Paying the vets bill up front may well be his way of establishing ownership.

He is, remember, well ahead of you in his plans, and you cannot believe or trust anything he says.

I think that you should change locks/get alarm asap, for your own peace of mind if nothing else. If he has no plans to let himself in again, why would he even know. If he does, well you can deal with that as and when.

Yes he is a complete twat - I am not saying that he is not. Just that some posters seem to be carried away with imagining his motivations and evil intentions.

Not to mention trying to talk Lou into aborting a wanted and planned pregnancy, selling it as the best course of action for both of them, while hiding the fact he's got another baby lined up for sometime in December!

Where did he do that? he said it was inconvienent.

'tis the way of the internet Porto, people speculate and get a bit carried away.

Also, sometimes people do despicable things and just because the majority experience isn't that way doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Forewarned is forearmed 'n all that.

I'm not sure why you are getting worked up? Port has a habit of coming onto the thread, not to advise. But to dig at posters. Mock them and cause a bun fight. Which takes the thread off for several pages.

Just leave it.