real life challenges vs online misadventures, dating (and non-dating) thread 19

[hatesponge]

I have been to the pub. I'm not pissed but I am happy (well happier at least).

Conclusions reached this evening:

1. I am pretty bloody amazing, and any man I choose to date is very very lucky and should appreciate this fact!
2. Online dating is not for me. But I have learned from it that I shouldnt judge a book by it's cover and not to be so superficial
3. Man from the weekend DID like me, he is either still in love with his wife, or still hurt by her and lacking in confidence, there is NOTHING I did wrong, and he probably will be back at some point, but it will be too late because I will have MOVED ON :)
4. I am joining the gym and losing my remaining 3 stone.
5. I am going back to my old haunts in Essex this weekend because I have the best nights out there and feel at home. I intend to drink, dance, look fabulous and talk to anyone and everyone!

So that's my resolutions for the thread in essence, less moaning, more exercise, to have fun and be sociable to everyone, less aloof unavailable ice queen and more friendly and approachable.

Time, it wouldn't surprise me if he did, and needed to be told very plainly DO NOT CONTACT ME AGAIN

Love the cutting reply by the way :o

Lubey, I first thought you meant shagging his best mate.

Good. :)

Hahaaa :o no, I meant being the only one working on things.

It just amazes me how many men think that just because they think we are 'sexy', that they are entitled to treat us like sex objects. What happened to wooing a woman? Courtship and all that stuff? He hasn't even bought e a coffee and he was asking for 'sexy pics'. Not that a coffee would have made any difference, but you know what I mean

Nice reply, Time. Much more to the point.

I have just had another thought about RL dating. Sadly, I am otherwise busy, but until the end of the month I'll be going for lunch in the nearby hospital canteen.
If I was still actively looking, I could well target a hot doctor and suddenly faint.
(although with my luck I'd be helped by a gay male nurse or something...)

time, i suspect these men imagine we are so pleased & flattered when they refer to us as sexy that we'll just hand over whatever they ask for.

Deluded fools who believe that we only care about appealing to them

Like Mr Tongue who told me twice (one in loco and one by text) he had a hard on.

Yeah, so?

god, we're a frigid bunch of hard work, aren't we? no wonder we're single!

it's the patriarchy, ladies. :) so many men think that we should drop to our knees in gratitude that they define us as 'sexy'. too much porn. too few brain cells.

I am not frigid! Sex texts are fun! But not from the word go!

I'm not frigid either, but like Fate I don't want sex talk before I've sussed out the goods. If I like a man then yes, I like to know I turn him on, but I really don't want to hear about some random strangers hard on. I once got a message from a bloke telling me he had a hard on that could break concrete. I told him that he needed a better quality concrete and blocked him. The there was the guy who told me he wanted to make my face look like a plasterers radio!! I mean, where do they get all this shite from?? I don't like being called sexy, I don't mind attractive but sexy implies something else. I wouldn't mind a partner calling me sexy but not some candle sniffing knob who approached me in Poundland.

i think the irony in the first part of your post has been missed Snape!
You are spot on:o

i think the irony in the first part of your post has been missed Snape!
You are spot on:o

And you liked Snapes post so much Mercury that you just had to repeat it!

i was being ironic! 'frigid' is a word bandied about by men when women won't do what they want them to. it's up there with 'lezza' when you don't go into orgasmic delights at their lack of teeth and personal hygiene. :)

actually, i was being facetious. :)

Yes Snape, I was actually fully expecting him to come back with a reply accusing me of being frigid. I was ready for that one!

Some men really have no respect for women do they? They see a pair of boobs or a nice figure and for some reason think they are entitled to a bit of it. Regardless of what the woman wants. To some men, we are merely wank fodder!! Twats.

there's something really gratingly entitled when men behave like that.

It's about on a par tbh with men yelling 'get your tits out' . I have to say I thought hoped having now reached 40 I might have got to some natural cut off point where men stop heckling me but no, apparently not. I do wonder what goes through their minds - am I meant to be flattered? actually whip them out? honestly.

and this is why I'm single a proud feminist. :)

Well, I know one thing, I am happy to be single for as long as it takes, I will not be lowering my standards or accepting intolerable behaviour just to be with a bloke.

Snape can you define feminist in simple terms for me please? I like to think I'm a feminist but I get a bit confused and I'm too scared to post on the feminist section.

I think it comes down to ego, expecting you to be so enamoured by their amazing maleness that you will be desperate to flash bits or do whatever it takes to have a chance with them. Erm... no.

Time to me being a feminist just means wanting global equal rights for women and standing up against injustices and media portrayals that make out we are all obsessed with shoes and/or just existing to provide titillation for males.

You mean like when they flash this little wrinkly fucking ugly thing at you and say "Can you handle that?"

They are so in love with their own willys that they think we must be too.

:) there are lots of different types of feminists, but in it's purest form it simply means equality between the sexes. It doesnt necessarily mean you hate men (but some feminists do.) It doesn't mean you want to pee standing up or stubbornly insist on putting up shelves when your male partner or friend might be better at it than you. It doesn't mean that you have to stop shaving your armpits. it simply means that you level the playing field, dont necessarily feel like you have to conform to what society thinks is 'feminine', believe in equal pay, equal rights and can change a tyre without going all wispy and girlie. You're definately a feminist time most people are, it's just that the radical interpretation scares people sometimes.

yes thats exactly it re: the wrinkly fucking ugly thing

what lubey said. (did i mention that I love you Lubey.... ?)