Chutney

[LouP19]

Where do I go? My thread has gone?!!

Bit upset by the soap opera comments, but understand it probably came out wrong. I like a quiet life. I like reading. I like staying in. I like cats. I like gardening and looking at stuff in Dunelm mill. This is NOT me at all.

Lol Sugarice - agreed, the gift that keeps on giving!

I would be tempted to say, "I will be driving at lunchtime today and then my phone battery will die..." - but I wouldn't of course! Ditto, "I'm not surprised you're unhappy, men who walk out on their pregnant wives probably do mostly feel a bit shit, don't they?" :o

Lou you are doing so well and I'm not convinced it's in your interests to talk to him at all before you see solicitor again and get the ball rolling. He sounds like a spoiled brat. At the minute you are wrong-footing him but you've seen what a cold-blooded bastard he can be. He'll get moving on legal stuff very quickly so better to get your solicitor organised first. Maybe avoid talking to him or pretend to be too upset to talk.

Oh please don't speak to him, the thought of him getting more and more frustrated at his lack of control is delicious!

I am really not very happy at all. You care about this! My feelings are your feeling are your feelings, remember? You seem to be malfunctioning. I should never have left you, I had no idea you'd have thoughts of your own without me to direct you. This is very worrying.

You must step back in line asap, I need to be in control. To help you get in place, I am reminding you we speak when I say so, not before and not a minute later. I rejected your call as part of your re-training program, however I shan't put that in writing. Here's an obviously fake excuse: I know you'll understand.

We will speak at lunchtime. Don't forget, what I say goes.

Cunt.

Wow, Lou, how great that your solicitor meeting went so well! Keep going with the 'doing life' stuff, and being with friends :) x

haha, my typing seems to be malfunctioning in sympathy

Please be very careful with him. He's moving into the victim phase because you aren't playing the role that he decided you would or conveniently disappearing and worse being pregnant
Omg you told you parents, who omg spoke to his and told them the truth. Omg the ow may be found out, how does Lou know, ow may find out he's been less than truthfully...

This is now about him losing control and being backed into a corner and lossing face... Being the bad guy!

Poor guy, it must be so stressful being him

Watch out for depression, breakdown or early midlife crisis

Ah, yes, belagh, any bets on how long before "going off the rails" followed by crap suicide attempt?

Poor Chutney. Does no-one care that he's not able to use his phone whilst it's on charge? This clearly demonstrates the depths of his trauma and not that he is a complete tosser. Albeit a tosser with custody of the country's Premier Chutney Collection.

Glad the solicitor appointment went well; your friend with the 'me, me, me' attitude doesn't sound like the most useful person to be around right now.

I love his text. I love the fact that the guy that moved out every fucking possession including his sodding chutney, the guy who won't tell you where he is living, is complaining about your lack of availability. And announcing that he's not happy - like that should be your number 1 priority. Delusional much?

Please don't reply - he's practically announcing that that's the best way to wind him up further. Just make sure you don't answer your mobile to any withheld numbers in case he realises you're screening him.

Excellent post, tribpot

Loved his text! Translates to "I am a compulsive liar, but not a very good one".

This solicitor sounds perfect, but keep an eye on costs, every letter, phone call etc will be charged. If it is true that he would pay costs if adultery cited, that should be the route to go, do you have to have names etc, or can it be "parties unknown"? The WHICH book will tell you!

Hard to believe that in a uni department there is no gossip about his adventure, go and have coffee in his staff commom room Lou.

As to the dairylea cheese ~ laughing cow is my favourite, must be something comforting about warm cheese, I had fried camembert sandwich today~evil!

Take care.

SO glad the meeting with the solicitor went well! She sounds thoroughly professional. I hope she can get you the result you want.

"...the gift that keeps on giving" I lol'd at that!

I wonder when he'll finally admit what he's doing? It's quite obvious he's with the other woman, all this dicking about with addresses and phones. How much of an idiot is he?

He really is an idiot, isn't he? All this, coming from someone who is an "intelligent" academic. He's got the emotional intelligence of a toddler. Almost funny - but clearly not for Lou.

Ok, well he's rang and left a message on the answer phone. And then I called him back, I couldn't resist.

The OW is pregnant. She is due in early December.

I am totally devastated. He said he tried to persuade her to get rid of it, but she's very 'independent' and wants to keep it. She has no idea I'm pregnant or that he was still with me.

Oh Lou I'm so sorry, one whammy after another .

Well he really has fucked up hasn't he? I'm sorry you were right in your instincts. So now he's facing the prospect when ow finds out. Of being single dad to two, with 2x the maintenance, no wonder he is panicked.

((((hugs))))) That's just the shit. I'm really sorry.

Sorry to read the latest Lou.
It explains why he's been so flappy and he's in really in a mire of shit.

oh Lou - that just beggars belief, doesn't it?

Well no wonder his life has come crashing down - he's been pretending their are no consequences to actions like his, and now there are two.

(((hugs)))

I've never been in your situation but I think I'd be on the phone to someone about now, setting up a tea-and-cake session for after work. Hope you get some RL person to chat to as well as all the great advice and backup here.

Oh that's shit.

I remember you did wonder if that was the case way back.

This is a shock but it's not your problem. It's his. What a complete twat he is.

Oh Lou I am so sorry.

((((hugs))))

I have lurked, and been beyond admiring about how brilliantly you have handled this whole thing.

Do you think hes telling the truth? Or could this be some way to try and subtly pressure you into terminating your pregnancy?

I wouldn't necessarily believe him , he's a liar who's wriggling like a worm now. Your main concern is you, no-one else.

That means she conceived late March to mid april, if it helps you think about when he started/ramped up being a total arsehole to you.

Oh god, it just gets worse he has well and truly fucked up.

I also think that this could be part of a tactic to pressure you to abort.

I'm not saying you shouldn't abort, btw, but you certainly shouldn't do it just because he wants you to.

Not that i know you havent decided what to do over that, but hes obviously very keen for you to do so.

He really is a twunt. I thought my XP was a prize plonker, but i dont think hed even get on the podium with some of the stories on here!