More than smacking

[verysadmum]

For obvious reasons, I've changed my name for this one.

My child has been hit (by hit I mean more than a smack & leaving a bruise) by his Dad on more than one occasion, I know I have to do something but what?

Have you had any experience in this? Obviously anything that prevents him being hurt is the best solution but what would you do? Social services to report? Solicitor to get injuction? Something else?

URGENT!! TIA

You could be me.

But he has never realised, still now. It will start dawning on him soon, when he's alone and has lost everything. It breaks my heart but he would have kept thinking he could get away with his power, i just have to show him he's not as powerfull as he thinks. Love is about being kind

..and I have to show my h that I (or should I say WE) will not put up with all of this. That he has no right to do any of it with no excuses. Love is also about respect and I know he can't possibly respect us and I no longer respect him.

If you want to speak send me an email i will ring you in the new year when my phone is back on. You don't have to feel alone, i do a lot, but once you put things into prospective you cheer up. If you ever need chat my no. is 01625

They don't know what respect is!!!!!! 265710

Thank you - I have written it down so please email tech to get it deleted!!!

I do feel so alone too, quite a lot and even when he was here. I can put things into perspective again but it does take a while. You're helping now, I'm not crying atm.

No, no one will read this thread and if someone rings up i can put the phone down
It will take a long time, it's not like a, women don't put up with shit thread. Lifes not like that you loved this guy, that is something important. You just have to teach him like a child, that every human being deals with the consequences of there actions. You suffer when you do something bad. Let him learn that lesson, he might get stronger for it

You're right and he should learn the consequences. I guess the fact I haven't made him learn before hasn't helped. I obviously adopt the ignore bad behaviour and it'll go away' approach!

As you said I DID love this guy - so much. He was my life until our children came along and then THEY (inc h) were my life...

Have you gone to bed, sleep well, you will get through this, i promise, it won't be easy but you will. Love xxx

Ummm. no. Are you going to bed now? My brain is sadly working overtime and my fingers slow!!!

It's like the parents that constantly bail there children out, stop them getting arrested.... pay there fines...... they don't understand how serious what there doing is, until.....
Leave him to it Sad for you but in the long run, a better father maybe, hopefully

No i'm not anywhere near bed, i think mumsnet has a lot of women who go to bed early

... until it's too late?

I can't forget his face still. The look of pure anger and aggression. I have several images that I remember regulary. Unfortunately I suspect ds does too...

I always new, when he had flipped, i s**t myself, i shaked a lot, it's in the eyes

I think you're right about bed times!!

I was never an early to bed person before this but usually by 12 or 1. A usual for me now is 2-3, sometimes I don't fall asleep until about 4.30-5.30. Some nights I just don't sleep...

But by the time they get that look you can't do anything. You can't calm them down or defuse it unless you completely give in as I have done... sometimes.

I didn't sleep for months, and then last lonth i couldn't stop, i got so exhausted, i gave up. But you'd think there'd be loads of women up, complaining, surely it's not just us, the only unhappy women in the world

Yep that look, you've had it. I was always worried about that look when we were out. It happened a couple of times

maybe they're all listening to us instead!!!!

Seriously though aren't mums in Aus & NZ up now anyway?

Sod anyone Did he ever get violent with other people mine did a couple of times, i tried to cover it up

I've never had it to the same degree (the look) when we've been out. He's not one that would show his aggression to others, just us. Aren't we lucky?

Mildly ar$ey but not true aggression - he saved that just for me.

Mine, and i do sound like an idiot now Hit my friends boyfriend one night. Slagged off alot of people when he was drunk aaaaannnnnd, got in a fight with my brother at my sisters wedding That was to do with my brothers mental head though

I used to think thank god he's come home from work in a good mood, i could relax then

and why would you be the idiot?