Living with a narcissist

[Abitwobblynow]

Is hard. Busy taking one day at a time whilst I work on myself and developing stability. He isn't horrible but he isn't available either.

Anyway, now that my eyes are opened, it is sad/interesting to see the mini-moments that announce his narcness, that I was so blind to before! If I see them, I can either set boundaries or self-soothe to stay calm.

Last weekend, he tells me he bought a Ferrari. *

So, phone rings (he is on a business trip). Telling me about his evening out with adoring female acolytes (he likes them best). I started telling him about two of our friends, who are having issues.

Silence, and then: well then. I must go.

I have come on so much. I used to be destroyed, now I feel vaguely sorry for him. It must be awful to be that empty.

*Don't worry. Whilst I did not cause him, cannot cure him and certainly can't control him, it went down on the list with all the other toys for misappropriation of marital assets when the time comes.

Absolutely Salbertina: I call this the IMAGO (Harville Hendrixx) process.

I'm new to mumsnet but feel I need advice. My husband is a successful company director & I believe a sociopath (although it took me a long time to realise this). I am very lucky & have a lovely life with my children in a nice home.

However, I'm finding it increasingly hard to deal with his selfish behviour at the moment. Our son, 7, has always been slightly different & struggles with having empathy for others, amounst other things. I've been to see a psychologist who suggested he may be a psyopath. This was my worst possible fear & im sick with worry. All my husband can say is 'that's like me.' Which further supports my theory on him being a sociopath (not a psyco as I don't believe he has violent thoughts). He won't comment any further & is totally uninterested in offering any support. I'm dealing with this all alone. I have put plans in place with the therapist to help my son & am confident I'm doing everything I possibly can to help him.

It doesn't stop me from feeling incredibly lonely. My husband never listens, offers advice, shows any genuine concern or comforts me in any way. All he is interested in talking to me about is food and sex (to which is the last thing on my mind at the moment). He has always been this way & I find it especially hard in times of need to stay strong.

Has anyone out there got any advice or experience of being lonely in marriage/being married to a sociopath/having a child with a psychotic problem?

Hi Lottie,
Maybe start your own thread as people may not see what you have posted.

If your husband was a sociopath he probably wouldn't have the social skills required to be a successful company director so is more likely to be a psychopath. Psychopaths not always violent.

Look at narcissistic personality traits you may well relate to that - lack of empathy etc.

Anyway start your own thread am sure you will get a lot of support.

Thank u donners312.

My therapist said a sociopath is basically the same as a psychopath but without violent thoughts. I have looked up narcissistic personalities also as I believe he has 1 of those.

To be honest I have no idea how to start my own thread!? I thought that's what I was doing when I posted on here, lol. I need to learn to navigate this site.

Thank u