Back in the sack

[Verminator]

I'll spare you all the gory details but I've recently become a dad. Babies arrival was more than a little traumatic and I am/was expecting it to take a while before we resumed "bedroom activities". We've talked about it and naturally Mrs Verminator is very anxious about getting back on it. However we still haven't even taken any small steps. She is even reluctant to kiss as she thinks this is going to lead to more. She has some confidence issues. I'm really not sure what to do or what advice I want. Just a little tired of being rebuffed. What is a reasonable time to wait?

Rodea I don't use active convos either, go to sections i need.

Rodea, don't you feel like you are in a bad dream on this thread atm?

why does it matter what you do ?

the thread "how do you use MN" is a common one that pops up regularly

cue numerous replies of "threads I'm On, threads I'm watching, AiBU, chat, Active Convos"

that's not the main oint - he's hard to identify! proably a thousand women think 'it may be my H - or not'.

How do you know he is not sulking and getting angry? He certainly got angry with MAHC over a pretty innocuous question. And his sense of entitlement that he feels he can take a 12hr break if he feels like it, regardless if his wife's feelings on the matter is not exactly showing he has much empathy.

And how do you know his wife isn't posting about her husband pestering her for sex, he found it and decided to get MNers on his side.

We don't know. But we do know that she posts on here and it isn't OK to come on and post about your problems in a space she uses.

Abigail-how do you know he is getting angry etc?
He has not posted anything identifiable on here,and who says he can't post on here asking for advice just because his wife uses mn?
What about the threads where posters talk in great detail about their personal lives and share the fact that the person they are divulging info about comes on to mn and that they hope they don't get outed?

Likea-absolutely agree!off to bed now!

I said I didn't know (although it is certainly not beyond the realms of possibility given his responses on this thread.)

Why not use another site? There are plenty of others. Why choose the specific site his wife posts on where there is a risk she will find out?

184. Wow you have all been busy. Anyway, thought I'd return and let you all know how my evening went. anyfucker I took on board what you said about invading my wife's space by posting here and thought id better talk to her about it.

All I said was "I'd like to talk about trust"

She immediately apologised for sleeping with other people behind my back. Turns out that crying at a 12 week scan is a real turn off. Also this Rampant 2nd trimester that I passed off as a myth wasn't a myth after all when Garry is on the scene and that weekend at her sisters in London didn't happen either. She only made it as far as a hotel near Luton Airport. Apparently she doesn't want a maid or a nursery nurse and she shouldn't have to watch me degrade myself playing those roles.

For the record, the next bloke that turns up here asking about sex with his wife. Just tell him to buy a Subaru impreza and start wearing Ill fitting shirts. That seems to work wonders.

Very sorry to hear that your wife has shared this information with you. Sadly the relationships has many threads with OPs who've just found out their partner has had an affair. These may give you some support, however you may have already gathered this can be somewhat tempestuous waters.

Do you have anyone in RL you can talk to? Are you and your wife still talking?

"relationships section"

Okay I'll say it. This thread is weird.

Wtaf?!?

Sorry, don't believe that at all verminator. Trying for the sympathy vote and not getting it from me....

Oh dear!

Right so she slept with other people because you cried at the 12 week scan and have "degraded" yourself by looking after the baby. I'm sure. Either she's feeding you a line or you're feeding us a whole load of bullshit.

OK. Totally not sure what to make of that.

OP, did you somehow marry a woman stuck in 1910? Because (and I truly hope I will be proved wrong here) the opinion that she feels you are degrading yourself by doing housework & looking after your child is either very very unusual or err...made up.

did I just dream that update ?

Less of a dream and more of a nightmare I think AF!

Verminator - I'm taking your post last seriously in case it's true.

I'm sorry this has happened to you. Have you some support in RL at all? Someone you can share this with?

Did you have any idea she was sleeping with other men? Is this a complete shock?

You need to take some time, i think, to decide how you want to go forward with this situation. Are you and your wife still on speaking terms today?

There is alot of support to be had here.

post last?

last post!