to think dh should not have called me this on my birthday

[seenitallbefore2012]

"actually you are an ungrateful foul cow...."

because I said I didn't want chocolates.. yes I know that sounds awful but last week I had a very high cholesterol check and am panicking... I asked him not to get me chocolates this year for that reason... and apparently that is the [only] thing he got and I said I couldn't understand why he did as I was off anything like that.

I said to him, if he is going to be intentionally mean to me on my birthday, then can he leave me in peace to eat the food I bought and prepared with the kids...
he sat down straight away and started to eat.... as if it were a hotel mind, not in a sharing a meal way

On sat night we were going to go out for a meal for me and my eldest's birthday.. I think no one who is not going to be polite should come.
You see, he is just cashing in, he is not trying to be nice to me.

read the thread scuzy it usually helps.

i have Bat. i have.

scuzy.. that doesn't sound very nice either.

If you're happy to be with someone who calls you vile names then that's your choice. It's not something a lot of people would tolerate.

Dh and I have a laugh and say stuff in jest, but this was not a mutual joke for the op.

Then you'd know the answers to your questions.

I didn't say she should leave him

if your partner calls you names, scuzy, please don't try to trivialise someone else's dosress that it has happened to them

if my DH called me a cunt, I would think he had had a lobotomy in his lunchbreak, and then after I checked what he said and looked for the scar, he would be out of my house

what OP does is up to her...not me, not us on the thread and not you

scuzy, I can see your point but I am feeling a bit upset and don't want an argument.
I don't want you to stick up for him because he is in the wrong.
And just how wrong he is is getting clearer by the minute.

If my dh spoke to me like that he'd lose body parts.

You should wait til he's asleep, pinch his nose, wait until his mouth opens, then stuff all the bloody chocolates right in. That'll shut him up and give him something to think about

distress

and I hate that word used to women.. cow
cringe

OP i am sorry i dont mean to trivialise i guess every relationship is different. ask him why he is being so hurtful. have it out with him.

AnyFucker you are saying if you other half called you a cunt you would kick him out? simple as that?

Scuzy if my DH called me that I wouldn't be looking for the lobotomy like AF I'd be bloody doing it.

OP - It sounds to me like he wants to be centre of attention and resents you having a special day so has done his level best to sabotage it. It seems like he has done something that appears outwardly nice but actually isn't and then tries to claim that he is the victim and you are unreasonable when you are pissed off. This way he makes your big day all about him and his feelings.

Well sod him!

By the way

Happy Birthday

right ... yeah ... ok you would give him a labotomy?!

scuzy, I have known my H for 28 years

I have never known him call anyone a cunt

if he called me a cunt, I really would believe he had had some kind of mental trauma

scuzy - I was being a little facetious. However, I have never heard my DH use the word cunt let alone call anyone it. I would find it utterly unacceptable to be spoken to that way.

So as usual its all my fault.
I just told him, if he was going to be obnoxious then at least leave me alone.
He said... Its all your fault for shouting at me and going on, you should have heard yourself
so now I doubt myself.
Is it my fault..

Read the thread back and ask yourself that again.

at Bat

she means me..
but maybe he is saying I shouted first [ didn't think I shouted] and was being ungrateful when he went to the trouble of buying me something

Oh look...

He has made your birthday all about his hurt feelings rather than your hurt feelings because he couldn't be arsed to make the tiniest bit of effort to take your wishes into account in relation to your present

He sounds really self centred (and that's best thing I can say about him)

what is your problem, scuzy ?

the way your partner talks to you is unacceptable

you deserve sympathy too

He bought you something he knew you didn't want and couldn't enjoy.

I

i would like to know what people would genuinely do without all this "i'd rip off this head and then shove the chocloates down them" kind of answers.

i would like to know what would you do? i know its not acceptable but all this bravado talk is silly.