Support thread for survivors of childhood sexual abuse PART 4

[CailinDana]

The first three parts of this thread:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

The purpose of these threads is to allow survivors of childhood sexual abuse, their partners, friends, or parents, to talk in a safe place about what they think and feel. Nothing is off limits or taboo, just say what you want to say.

They are. Society abuses us again. We're almost tainted. I described myself as 'damanged goods' in a conversation today.

I don't feel human yet I feel raw with pain.

Has anything happened to trigger this? A bad memory randomly popping up in your head?

Anything you can do to help yourself for tonight coffee ? can you stand in the garden (if you have one/outside space) for a few minutes? Make yourself a warm milky drink? have a fag?

Pillowcase,

I'm a lurker on this thread, supporting someone close to me, really recommend one in four for support, though it can take time to get support.

I just thought you might be interested that the law will be changing in Ireland soon so that anyone who suspects abuse has a legal obligation to report it, it will be a criminal offense not to (wont be retrospective, but is an indicator that at last things will have to change in our society). At the moment, any allegation is taken very seriously by the guards, unfortunately cannot say the same for social services, but when this law passes they will have to change very rapidly

I don't want to say too much more as still at early stages, but to all the ladies who post, thank you, I can see the pain, the strength and the goodness of you all, and the thread really helps me as I support this person.

Yes sorry, was triggered, Thank you, just putting it down really helped. I was overwhelmed by an urge to selfharm so keeping my fingers busy helps. Really need to start journalling but I'd hate, hate, hate DS to find it and read it. Have had some fresh air, sugary and toast. x hugs.

Irish, is that law for victims? just worried incase a victim is too traumatised to report.

Glad your feeling a bit better. Tea is a saviour.

And don't apologise! This is exactly what this thread is for.

:o not sure the badgers would be impressed though!

No - for everyone, teachers family etc who suspects abuse, the priests are not happy because of the "confession box" ie they don't want to report. Its very important because of all the clerical abuse, but in many ways that has diverted away from the fact that most abuse takes place in families.

I would hope that it would protect children more in this instance, if that makes sense....

To late once the act is perpetrated even one time can cause untold emotional,physical and mental damage.

I understand your point Dolly but how can everyone else in the world protect a child? By reporting the offender.

I totally agree with you, however hopefully it makes society more responsible, and will ensure that support services are improved (social services are deplorable and without charities that support victims there would be no support for victims - there is no state support for adult victims here at the moment)

That sounds like a massively positive step forward. I hope it helps some children at the very least.

Can I just say thankyou Irish, for supporting your friend, I wish there were more people like you in this world. You are a very special person if thats not too soppy

Sounds horrendous..what you have all been through. My thoughts are with you.

Well done Irish. Am sure you are a great comfort to your friend.

Morning all. I was very busy with my visiting friends yesterday so I wasn't around. How is everyone today? Coffee it sounds like you had a tough night last night last night, did you manage to sleep? How are you feeling?

Morning Cailin did you have a nice time with your friends x

We had a lovely time dotty, a bit chaotic, but lovely to catch up. How are you?

Thankyou Cailin, glad you had a good day yesterday.

I always feel a bit silly after a flashback when I haven't realised I was having a flashback, I do really need to journal it, at least the feelings bit. I was triggered by the second load of Rochdale peadophile arrests on the news.

Morning everyone, hope everyone has a good day today.

Limited and Stuck, big hugs for being there for me last night, thank you so very much and x

Coffee, hope you're feeling ok today;
Irishtwit great that they're bringing something like this into law.
I feel society is changing. When we bring kids to swimming pool with school I know there's a great awareness of not leaving them alone with just one adult etc.

Also they watch the kids for other signs, even if it's just to grab them and shower then if they think they need it!!

Glad you're feeling better. Don't feel silly, you're anything but.

Coffee it's bloody everywhere just now most regions been really unsettling for me too, last night I was on fb chat with a friend who's a fellow survivor but she's come through the other side she asked me to talk to her after finding out I was struggling again she always tries to bring me back to reality she's an amazing woman.

Sorry I wasn't around much x

What is on the other side? I'd really like to know. I wasn't even aware that there could be one until I started approaching rock bottom in the last few months.

At the moment I feel like I'm wandering around with a sign around my neck with 'damaged goods' on it.

I always feel like I'm the consolation prize. Every relationship I've ever been in feels like a fraud. I'm always convinced that they have an alterior motive (money usually) and that they'd rather be with someone else, but I'm convienant.