whole world is falling apart

[Sarsaparilllla]

Some people might remember my previous thread, if not you can find it I think? Sorry but I can't bear to write it all out again, but basically my fiance kissed/was texting my SIL.......... I feel like I'm losing my mind

I made the (I now realise) ridiculous decision to try and give things another go with my fiance, he said he was sorry, he loved me, it was all a mistake and that we could try and make things work, and weirdly after all the arguments and tears and everything that's happened I thought there was a chance

In the meantime my DB has left his wife, moved away from the city we live in, back to my parents, has given up his job and everything, he will hardly speak to me but every now and again his wife is drip feeding him information (all of which I know, but he's struggling to take it in so every time I've tried to talk to him he won't have any of it) and every time she does he's been on to me, but I know it all, but because he isn't able to deal with listening our relationship is deteriorating so much :(

My parents are being supportive of both of us, whatever we both decide but after seeing my DB at the weekend and realising what this really has all done, I don't think I can continue, it's ruined the relationship I had with my DB, I don't know if it'll ever be the same

My brother has said he'll never speak to me again if I stay with him, and I understand why, I really do, I was just trying to clutch onto something I think, but I was wrong

I think I've been kidding myself, that if we carry on as normal it never happened and things will be ok - it's almost sometimes as if this has happened to someone else and it's not real - me & my fiance, on a day to day basis are getting on well, which is why it feels like that I think??

Sorry if this is a bit rambling, I feel like I'm falling apart and I need to end it all, he keeps talking about the wedding plans and how we should book this and that, I can't even think about it, it makes me feel sick, my brother should've been an usher and now he won't even speak to me :(

Chipping, yes, I can see the attraction of doing that!

I would ask the wedding planner to send a note out to all who were invited, along the lines of 'I regret to inform you that I have called off the wedding. I found the prospect of marrying someone who was cheating on me with my SIL far too unpaletable. He might think he's God's Gift to Women, but I don't.'

LOL, thank you that has just made me proper laugh, not that I'd actually do it, but hilarious :o

ChippingIn - trouble is all his family are actually lovely and much as I don't want him to get away with it in some ways it'd be easier if they didn't know

If they are lovely, all the more reason for them to know. You don't want them thinking badly of you, do you?

I was thinking of a note like the Save the Date notes.

"Cancel the date. Due to revelations about the groom's character, there is no way this wedding is taken place."

Everything's fucked, it really is The only thing that's fucked is his brain, honey. Only a man whose brain is fucked beyond repair could show such colossal disrespect to his bride to be and her family by having it off with her sil.

The hard thing is I still love the old him, before all this happened, the old us where everything was good and fun and we had a future, that's what I miss, but it was all bullshit, none of that was real

Love's illusions can seem convincingly real, but the man you met and fell in love with is one and the same as the man he is now. He hasn't changed, it's just that you're seeing him for what he really is - worthless and unworthy of your love.

When do you intend to tell him to ship out?

Stay strong, sars

when does he leave ?