how long was your engagement??

[BabyPeepyGobbler]

DP proposed to me in a lovely romantic way at christmas. We've been together almost five years, three DC...I was over the moon. He told me to go off and plan my ideal wedding, he wasn't bothered if I wanted to do it small and soon or lavish and wait a while. Each time I've wanted to talk about it or tried to set a date it's been met with the same response from him - "What, you mean this , isn't that a bit soon?" So what was the point in telling me to go off and plan it for whenever when he obviously has no intention of agreeing to the dates I come up with, and neither will he give any input of when he would be happy to do it!
I think if you want to marry someone, you want to marry them, simple as that, no need to wait yonks unless you want to save and spend a fortune (which I don't, it's not my style) and if you've already been living together for ages anyway, plus DC together, why drag out the engagement?

So what I'm asking (for a bit of perspective on the issue) is - how long was your engagement?

We were engaged for 14months but got married abroad so had to give people enough notice, plus we had to save etc for the day.

Baby- sarcasm is the lowest form of wit- it you are wanting to make this personal.

I still feel sorry for you as it happens. You really need to stop pretending- to yourself more than anyone.

I am actually leaving this thread now because it's obvious I should have been asking DP why he wanted a long engagement in the first place rather than posting here, although i loved hearing all your engagement stories! Now I've had that conversation with him I can see where he 's coming from, there's not much point thrashing it out on here anynore. Thanks to all who posted and shared their stories and opinions.

So, are you going to ask him to set a date?

Got engaged at the beginning of April, got married at the beginning of September so 5 months though we had originally planned a later date which would have meant just under a year of being engaged.

well we agreed when he gets back we should make an appointment at the registry office so I think having a date in mind before we go is probably the best idea! If we are waiting til next year then I'm going to suggest the date we met which was in February.

That sounds like a good plan, I hope it all goes well for you. Having a date set doesn't half focus the mind!

Oh, and good luck and please let us know how you get on yes I am a nosey cow.

Thanks glasto, I will

5 years, but I was only 16 when we got engaged

I'd have mmore respect for you if you actually admitted that you feel your DP is dragging his heels- which is why you posted in the first place

I agree with Blue.

All people are really saying is you're entitled to be concerned about it. You don't need to dress it up, or be defensive.

And if that was why I posted I'd have spelled it out not hoped someone would find a hidden meaning. I think some of you are looking for something that isn't there. But I appreciate your input, thanks.

Oh dear. Sorry it's developed into a bit of a row on here OP. The only advice I think is that you must listen to your own gut feelings on this one. Only you really know what they are telling you.

Thanks

Bottom line is I trust and have faith in my DP. He's a good man who's never done me wrong. I read some of the threads on here and I feel so bloody lucky that I found a good 'un. Thanks again all

Good luck. I am sure it will work out and your wedding will be lovely.

Good luck, I'm sure you know your DH best and people were only reacting to what you have posted on here, we don't know you, him or the full story.

Feb would be nice. It might be worth checking that your venue has availability before speaking to the registrars to book a date.