The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Staying Springy In Their Quest For Sobriety.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse I have an shockingly abusive relationship with alcohol, mainly vodka.

This Bus is full of drinkers, non-drinkers, thinkers and Babes, all trying to find their way to a happy, sober life.

Some are there, some are almost there and some are not. It really doesn't matter, we're all in this together.

Why not find a seat? Everyone is welcome, drinking or drunk, come and say hello.

HERE is the previous thread, with a link to all of the other wonderful journeys so far............

mia I was struck last week how strong and motivated you sounded in your posts, and also how pleased you felt at your non-drinking / limited drinking achievements. Don't feel that you can't do it. You're maybe not yet managing to do it consistently, that's all. It can come with practice. Don't give up because you feel like you've fallen off your bike, just try sitting on the saddle, give a couple of pedals, and imagine soaring away and feeling the wind in your hair

Ooh I seem to have come over all metaphorical and fanciful.

She's got cancer, not dementia Mia .
That is why the mental decline is hard.
Whether its the drugs or the cancer - I don't know.

Silver I'm so sorry. It's probably a combination of both that affecting her mentally. If she's receiving lots of pain meds then that's going to dull her clarity of mind, too. Very hard for you to witness that.

venus I was very motivated last week, I don't know what happened yesterday. You're right of course, I shouldn't let a couple of bad days throw me for such a loop. I tend to be such an absolutist thinker, I know I do, and I must try not to fall into the trap of thinking 'well I screwed up yesterday so fuck it, may as well give up'.

After my skin being much clearer than usual over the last fortnight, my face is covered in bloody spots over the last few days. Makes me think all this emotional unheaval is probably hormonal. I feel better today - had a nice lazy morning in bed with DD learning Italian on the ipad. Will walk the dog after lunch now that the weather's brightening up, and buy something nice to cook for dinner.

Today I will be drinking, but not in the way that I was drinking last night, I hope. Yesterday I couldn't cope with my feelings. Today is a different day.

I think this is such a wonderful community and I?ve come here to ask your advice. I?m not sure whether I have a problem, I certainly feel OK drinking the way I do and it doesn?t get me into trouble or interfere with my life in any way. In fact I believe it enhances it and it's a treat I look forward to.

The main issue is that I drink alone and that?s because I live alone and have a limited social life ? but that?s the way I like it. I enjoy my own company very much and love to read, write, garden and watch films. My job is great and I have a lot of interaction with my lovely colleagues. I have a DD with whom I have a wonderful relationship and she spends roughly half her time with her dad. I drink on two occasions a week, usually once in the week and once at the weekend (when DD is with her dad) and I?ll usually have a bottle of wine on each occasion, so at 18 units that puts me slightly above the recommended weekly limit. If I do go out, I?ll drink less at home but if I told this to my GP, he?d probably tell me I?m a binge drinker and solitary drinking is very bad! I'd be so grateful for your opinions.

Silver I'm so sorry to hear that, really big hugs. Mental strength and physical health are so closely intertwined.

Mia do not let a couple of bad days get you off track. They are a wobble, and that's all.

Hi SolitaryTippler and welcome :-)

I'm not sure if you have a problem ... you maybe think that it is though or you wouldn't have posted?

I'll wait for someone more experienced to come on board ...

Tippler to me that sounds perfectly fine; if it isn't negatively impacting your life, if you're not finding that you're wanting to drink more often and more volume, then I don't think drinking alone two nights a week is in itself a problem. Do you feel hungover the next day and if so how do you feel about that?

What do I know though - I haven't got the greatest relationship with alcohol!

solitary why have you came here?

Not a mischevious post, but there must be something about your drinking that has made you question it.

What makes you choose your drinking nights? I have a lot of sympathy for you, btw. My DH works away a lot so I disgarded the not drinking on your own advice as irrelevant to me.

A non alcoholic would find a bottle a lot to put away at once.

hello mia glad to hear you're feeling a bit brighter this morning. I'm amazed you can walk the dog though, its chucking it down here!

Another relevation today - I always thought that I didn't drink that much, because I rarely get a hangover. Someone on here has just pointed out that this actually means my body has learnt to tolerate high amounts

help I once said to my boss that 'I only had a bottle of wine' He was shocked and said that he thought that was a lot! I thought it was a quiet night out!

sorry silver - total wrong end of the stick. don't know where i got dementia from sorry.

Thank you for your replies! helpyourself I suppose what's brought me here is the fact that I tend to drink alone and it's frowned on. I do also acknowledge that a whole bottle would be quite a lot for a "moderate drinker" but I never seem to want more than my two a week.

NonAstemia I don't really get hangovers, which is probably not a good thing. Just tend to get more tired than usual towards the end of the day. What is your relationship with alcohol like?

My fault saf - I assumed silver's description of her DM's confusion meant it was dementia she was suffering from. You know what they say about assume makes an ass out u and me...

solitary sounds like you're absolutely fine to me. if you live and don't go out much and enjoy being home alone of an evening to relax then your drinking is likely to be alone. your consumption or regularity is not increasing and you don't experience any problems due to your drink.

i don't think you have a problem do you?

Tipple I think that if you enjoy your own company, why shouldn't you enjoy a drink on your own in the same way that you enjoy a film or a good meal or whatever? I'm not advocating drinking to excess (and a bottle is a fair bit to many people), but neither do I think that a level of drinking which would not otherwise be problematic becomes so just because you're alone, iyswim.

My relationship with alcohol is that I don't drink enormous amounts or during the day, but I will drink wine every night unless I make a determined effort not to. Before I stepped aboard this bus I was drinking between half a bottle and a bottle most nights, and about a bottle and a half on weekend nights.

Saf, no I don't think I have a problem, I'm just concerned about the solitary drinker tag but what you and NonAstemia both say about drinking alone is so true. I suppose I do have a niggle that a whole bottle might be rather a lot but it never does anything but make me feel chilled and happy. I suppose I'm concerned about the health implications more than anything - do you think that drinking that much at once is likely to be harmful?

And I know you've cut down dramatically since you came here Mia - well done.

Same here mia - not a huge amount, 2 or 3 glasses of wine BUT pretty much most nights. I just got into a self-destructive rut.

Tippler, I would say that on balance, you don't have an alcohol problem. Your total unit count per week is within the safe limits. A doctor would tell you that you binge drink though (rich, coming from a current bottle-a-nighter, I know!). You clearly have it under control, so in your position, I would not beat myself up over a habit which is not likely to be harmful to your health.

Thanks Carrie, tend to beat myself up a lot, it's a habit!

Are you hoping to cut down?

I am hoping to quit altogether, Tippler; cutting does not work for me, I am an all or nothing type. I've done it many times, for weeks on end on occasions, but always slip back. I have to work out why that is, because I'm not physiologically addicted - its all psychological, that much I do know. I think, like many others here, that I get complacent, and think I can manage to control myself. Interestingly, I have no problem with social drinking - it's when I'm alone that the problems occur.

Sounds like you're very self-aware Carrie - all the best.

Hello Babes!
Nonastemia Good luck with today.

Carrie I know what you mean. The trouble is avoiding triggers for drink, and there are so flipping many of them. Lunches, dinners, airports, trains, just everything has become a trigger. It's coping with them.

Having progressed from a couple of glasses of wine a night, to a bottle of wine a night and now to two bottles of wine a night and occasional midday drinking, I just know I have to cut it out entirely.

Good news, I think. I went to the addiction clinic today and the dodgy ECG was not in fact dodgy at all. So I have come away with a large brown paper bag full of pills. I have some vitamins, because apparently heavy drinking affects absorption of vitamins. I have to take these for two weeks. I have some stuff to cope with withdrawal which I have to take for the next 2 days. I also have some Antabuse, which will start on Monday morning.

This is the first day of the rest of my life. I WILL NOT DRINK AGAIN. I hope. Thanks for all the support.

Great news Hope - hope this is the turning of a corner for you!

Hopefully! - what a relief! Im so happy for you!
Time for you to kick some butt! Roll on Monday.
We are here for you every step of the way lovely Brave Babe.
x

Solitary I don't think you have a problem at the moment. You enjoy a bottle of wine once or twice a week and seem happy in your life. My only concern is that drinking can be a slippery slope - one or two bottles a week can become three or four and so on. That is how drinking became a problem for me.

I started off having a couple of bottles of beer or a glass or two of wine a couple of nights a week. At the time, I was living alone. As time went on, I started to drink more heavily and, until lately, I was downing a bottle of wine every night and sometimes more.

I am married with a young child and spent a lot of time thinking about drink, worrying about how much I was consuming but also worrying that I didn't have 'enough' in the house. It became a problem.

As I say, it sounds like things are fine at the moment but I would keep an eye on your feelings about drink as time goes on.