IN the last six months, my wife has put on loads of weight, and it's really upsetting me because I don't know how to tackle it, or encourage her to tackle it. (I don't mean a couple of pounds, either....)
It's safe to assume she knows this. There are mirrors in the house, and her clothes don't fit. The last time I tried to gently raise the issue, a couple of months ago, she got very upset. I don't want to hurt her, so I've more or less shut up about it, since when she has got fatter. She eats stuff that she never used to touch: biscuits, sweets etc. She eats far more than I do and I'm four inches taller and a bloke.
It's a bit more complicated: her mother died last year, which may well have something to do with it, as might the menopause: she is 50 and the change has started, she is pretty certain. Now, I'm no shrink or female health expert, but may either or both of these things contribute to her over-eating?
Even if that is the case, how do I help her? If she is eating because of grief for her mum, how can I help her through this? If it's a menopausal thing, what can help? Even raising the subject will hurt her feelings and I don't want to do that. I hate the possibility that she may be miserable inside, but if I broach it, it will come round to the most obvious symptom: her weight gain.
I love my wife, and I value our marriage and family massively. I wish I could say that I don't care what she looks like, but I do.