The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Kicking The Devilish Demon Drink Into Touch This Hallowe'en!. Mwahahahaha!

[Mwahahahahahahahouseface]

Hello

I'm Mouse, well normally! [hgrin]

Welcome to the Bus. We are a mixed bunch of Babes, some of us drink, some of us don't and some of us are trying to find out the best way to cut down or stop completely.

There is plenty of room on the Bus for everyone so, come say hi. [hsmile]

And, if you'd like to see what brought us all here, you can read all of the past threads, including the original one by JWN RIGHT HERE

Ooh, how exciting Ma! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

'i think i'm going to try' - you'll probably need a firmer decision than that and a strategy of how to make it happen theala otherwise you will drink

sorry thurso - just didn't like to hear you putting yourself down x

all ok here. just the one beer last night which is good. oh - think tesco has turned up!

Morning everyone. Day 2 of not drinking, am feeling a little proud, despite DP coming home last night and literally handing me a bottle of bourbon, and , this pattern has been going on for too long, I have to be strong some how. Actually felling rather alert today, umm quite nice . Going to get a good days work in today. mouse hope your hospital app goes well, thurso I think your rants are doing you good. ma good luck on the work front, sounds like a challenge.

have you told him you're trying to quit/cut down blossom? if you have it really seems like deliberate sabotage and that's really worrying.

well done on reaching day 2

Swallow my DP is an alcoholic and is on AD's, he say he wants to cut down but has no will power. Yes he knows I want to severly limit my drinking and we agreed a plan last week not to drink during the week, I could stick to this if only he did not keep coming home with booze, yes he his trying to sabotage me in order to justify his drinking. There that is the top and bottom of it.

PS he can not afford to drink, part of the problem with hi breakdown and suicide attepmts was lack of money as he was literally drinking away any money he earned.

Well done blossom! The alert feeling after a few days of not drinking is great.

Ummm, I'm a bit confused about what kind of 'strategy' you think I should have, Saf, other than to drink non-alcoholic drinks instead of alcoholic ones.

it worked for me

Afternoon Babes

Theala - my response was directed at you, not Thurso, but having read what Thurso put, I directed my words to her also. How are you feeling today? Other than not sure about a strategy. I think for me at least, planning not to drink doesn't work. I have to want to not drink or just take it an hour at a time.

Like Monday and Tuesday, I didn't have a drink at all. Last night I had a bottle of cider, over ice, in a tall glass that lasted the night.

Tonight, who knows? I know that I shouldn't drink because of my LFT test, and the fact that I'm on morphine but it's just not that simple.

Si I have non alcoholic beers in to fool myself that I'm having a beer and as ridiculous as that sounds, it works for me. It really does, and now it works for DH.

blossom - how is DS and the baby? Everything still okay? xx

Ma - this is your time to shine, oh yes, why ever would it not be? You've been left in the shade for long enough, if the opportunity is there,then grab it with both hands and reel it in! Good luck! xx

Silver - thinking of you xx

Well, I'm back from hospital and my neurology appointment. I had an ECG but won't know the results until I next see the doc which I feel will be sooner rather than later but assume that if anything was bad, they'd have said.

He wants me to have a brain scan and an MRI on my neck and upper back, he's worried about me 'dropping' and feeling like I'm losing altitude (the only way I could describe to him how I feel) so wants to talk to my back consultant too so that they can discuss what areas each of them are looking after.

He also told me that scientists have now discovered that taking 60mg of Citalopram can cause fluctuations in the rhythm of the heart and they are now advising users to drop to 40mg. Apparently, this has only come to light in the last week.

So now I've got to get hold of my GP and ask him what to do. He mentioned another drug beginning with A, my GP, when I saw him but said he couldn't give me that because of the Citalopram, so maybe now he can? Who knows.

Off to make lunch, be back later xxx

WARNING - DO NOT JUST STOP TAKING YOUR DOSE OF 60MG CITALOPRAM, CALL YOUR GP FOR ADVICE PLEASE!!!

Sorry for typos

goodness silver I have been having some heart fluctuations recently - sudden really heavy thuds then it calms down again. I take 20mg Citalopran - wonder if that's been having an impact?
spoke to the Chairman this morning, he is ok with me stepping up
Board meeting starts in one hour.........

Mouse poor you your medical problems sound like a real ordeal. DS gf doing great thanks
Ma oh are you excited/worried? hope this additional responsibility equates to more money.

Ma - speak to your GP please. Get it checked out and WELL DONE for the moving on up in the world sweets, that's great news xxx

ma when I met you and you spoke a little about your work, I heard the voice of a woman who already does shine, someone committed and knowledgable and capable. I hope they give you the opportunity, you'll be a star

theala what I have found is that if I go out with the aim of "trying not to drink" then I tend to fail at the first sign of temptation. If people are already pouring out wine and I accept a glass because it's easier in the heat of the moment than fighting against the desire, or I get to the bar and get flustered and end up ordering out of habit. So my going out strategy was to absoloutely KNOW what I was going to have as a first drink, and no messing around dithering at the bar, being tempted by other options. Same goes for the second drink. I alos know what I'm going to say if I'm offered a glass of wine, e.g. "Well I'm actually very hot and thirstly at the moment, so I'm going to have a lime and soda at the moment", or "I've got a bit of a headache so I think I'll have an orange juice". It just means that I don't get sidetracked from my plans.

blossom well done you for not having a drink in the face of being handed a drink - that is some good strong will that you have. You are going to need that if your dp continues to sabotage your life in this way. What would he do if you just poured it away (or threatened to)? If you are serious about doing this, then you need two sets of plans - one for dealing with keeping sober (you're inner demon), and another for dealing with the outer demon actively putting temptation in your way.

But that will all unfold in the future. The most important thing is that you know what you plan to do TODAY. And TODAY I will not be drinking.

shaketheshame that sounds great that it is going so well for you. Have you lost the desire for a drink, or do you still have the desire but have better ways of dealing with it?

I read the book several years ago.

Theala make a list of reasons not to drink tonight and keep it in your bag to refer to when you're out. Remember that it's only the first drink which you need to avoid. If you think you want alcohol, how about ordering a soft drink and having that first. Repeat as necessary. You are not saying you are never going to drink. Just that you won't drink TODAY. And that is what we are all doing if we are not drinking.

blossom have you asked your DH why he keeps offering you drink when you've asked him not to? Is he generally inconsiderate and selfish or is it just this issue? Sorry if you don't want to talk about it (feel free to ignore me) but I wonder if this relationship is really working for you? Other than continuing to drink, which you have said you don't want to do, I don't see how you can move forward here .

Ma well done you. Be brave, you can do this .

others got there first theala. people tend to have strategies like venus', some have someone they can call if they get tempted or a mantra to repeat in their head. the knowing exactly what you're going to order is good as is having a back up drink in case they say oh sorry we haven't got that to avoid then standing dithering, feeling bad for taking up time and just ending up ordering a white wine/beer/whatever your usual order would be. i've heard someone else pass on the tip to grab a drink as soon as you get there and keep a drink in your hand all night long (non alcoholic obviously).

shake if you want to share your personal experience of how you found it and how it's helped you etc that's great. tbh just posting links feels like spam would love to hear how it actually went though, i remember you posting beforehand.

Also theala another tip is to have a 'ready made' excuse prepared if you suddenly want to leave. You probably won't need this but it is another strategy some people use if they want to avoid drinking and it's all getting a bit too much. Depends on your friends really. Some will try and get you to join them, others will think nothing of it if you're off the booze. How about driving there so that you can't drink and can leave any time you want?

oh yes i forgot about driving. i don't drive so it's not one i can use. tbh i have to avoid drinking situations unless i'm very, very convinced i don't want to drink. if i'm wobbly and i go into a situation like that i will drink. that's part of why i'm not aiming for total abstinence - a) it's not really necessary (i'm fairly sure) and b) i'd never be able to go out again

have had one beer today and may have another later if i still fancy it. all a bit daft as i've been really watching what i eat for the last couple of days as i need to kick start some weight loss but then i've drank beer

i think it helps to have really clear reasons as to why you're not drinking (for you not other people). it's really easy to forget why you're bothering when you're faced with everyone else enjoying 'normal' drinking and feeling like you're missing out for no good reason. know your reasons. i also found it helped to watch other peoples drinking and notice how not 'normal' most people's drinking is and view alcohol and it's use with a critical eye. obviously best not to share your observations out loud though

Hi all - sneaking back on for a bit of low level moral support. I've been really good up until this week, and then went out for dinner on Tuesday and to class drinks last night, so two midweek drinking sessions in a row - not ideal - and need to stop myself falling back into old habits (little voice saying "why not just write off the week and start again next week). Actually given that old habits mostly involved drinking at home on my own,it probably isn't that bad. but still. Giant risk attached to the Xmas season, me thinks.

will go back and read the last couple of weeks of posts later on this evening - hopefully everyone is reasonably well, happy etc etc

Hey All

Well, today is quite a big day for me. 365 days sober! Wow. Just Wow. I was broken emotionally when I clambered upon Gerald. The fear and self loathing was beyond what I could endure.

I am very glad to say that life is so so so much better now. Still have really rubbish days, even rubbish weeks at times but I am definitely a much much happier person. And I couldn't have done it without the support of this bus.

So thanks so much each and every one of you.

Bafana
xx

Right, well the concert is on just around the corner from me (about 3 mins walk), so I won't have that driving excuse. But I will be able to come home anytime I want. Also, the friends I'm going with aren't big drinkers anyway, so won't be pushing alcohol on me, I don't think. I'm going to order a diet coke as soon as I go in.

It's the birthday party of a friend I haven't seen in aaaages on saturday night, so I would like to look the least shit possible then, and that lovely hungover glow does nothing for me these days. Yes, it is slightly sad that vanity, rather than health is my driving factor in not wanting to drink tomorrow night, but fuckit. :o Thanks for the advice babeses.

Mouse seems to be tentatively good news that everything's been investigated properly anyway. I hope you get the results soon. xxx

huge well done bafana! that is amazing - well done you

doesn't matter what your motivation is if it works for you grab it and remember it theala. vanity will do just fine - for example i don't fancy getting one of those bulbous red noses

oh and posted too soon - legal good to see you, well done for catching yourself and not doing the oh well write off the week then thing. you must send me your address so i can send you these matchattax cards

Wow, Bafana! Fantastic!! Bloody well done to you, missus!

And good on you, legal, for recognising that you're sliding and coming back to fix it.

Saf, have you seen those "what you will look like in ten years' time" photos in Marie Claire and DM? I have a sneaking suspicion that I look like that now, and I'm trying to stop before it gets much worse.