Hello Babes
Welcome to Deeli, lovely to meet you 
x
JWN - I was so surprised to read your post about struggling the other night. I thought to myself that you'd be the last person to wobble so hard. But then again, no-one is safe from falling are they? That's how very fragile we all are. At any moment we could slip. I'm so relieved to see that you didn't. Well done. xx
thurso - my dear friend. I do wish your DH would really put some effort into your marriage instead of going out and doing what he wants to do. You are right in saying he behaves like a third child! Sending you massive hugs lovely xx
Saf - yep, get your train sorted and I'll gladly cut your hair again lovely . Has all your building work finished now?
obrigada - sending you lovely holiday vibes.
Ma - oh how fantastic for DD. I hope she likes the family and you do too, that's just as important, that YOU like where she's going to be.
Faire - I too counted my days but after a while, I found it counterproductive because I'd start worrying about making it to day 15, 16 etc. So after about 2 months in, I stopped counting. This is such a personal journey for us all. You have to do what's best for you even if that changes on a daily basis.
Sorry I'm not addressing you all, I'm slowly catching up.
I wanted to share all of this because I feel it's good to get it all down in black and white. It's a bit long, sorry. 
My weekend was fabulous. And, in a lot of ways, a huge eye opener. I had been feeling a bit 'stuck' in my marriage of late. I was wondering if 'that was it' in terms of this is our lot for the rest of our lives and to be honest, it wasn't what I wanted. At all. It wasn't my 'plan' but then again, lots of things are like that aren't they?
We were lying in the huge hotel bed watching Nemo play with his toys on Saturday morning when DH turned to me and said 'we really need to start doing more things for us'
I almost burst into tears. My heart just sprang back to life almost, do you know what I mean by that? It's like it had been dormant for a few years. I was suddenly whisked back in time to when we first met and I felt all of those feelings I did right from the very start.
You see I was beginning to feel that it was just me missing our relationship. I was starting to think that this was 'the beginning of the end' because we hadn't actually had any time out together for so long that we didn't miss it any more, or each other. We didn't go to bed and hold one another, never mind much else - sorry, TMI 
Date nights had become just like any other night. We bickered, moaned at each other, sniped, sighed, blamed one another for things, took our frustrations out on each other...... 
We'd become separate and apart but until DH said those few words, I hadn't felt that he knew. I thought he was just happy to plod along beside me instead of being with me.
We talked for hours, we walked along the beach holding hands, we went back to the place where he proposed to me, we had lunch and took our time. Just listening to one another. I actually opened up to him for the first time ever. I was totally honest with him without being scared of his reaction to how I felt or upsetting him.
And this all happened when we were sober. We drank champagne and ate delicious food. Nemo was so good, so happy, almost as if he knew that the cloud had gone from over our heads. He did have a huge vomit all over DH on Friday night and the hotel staff were amazing, so very helpful. It's always hard when he's sick away form home. Embarrassing, messy, etc and normally, that would add to the pressures of our day but it didn't. It's as if the sea air had blown all of the cobwebs away. We just got on with our evening.
I feel so new and refreshed. I feel like Mouse instead of MrsMouse, MotherMouse and CarerMouse. I just feel like me again.
Funnily enough, I didn't even drink that much even though I'd given myself permission to. Strange that really isn't it? 'You can't have that' so you want it more. 'Help yourself' and you don't over indulge.
Anyway, thank you for all of your support Babes and for reading if you got this far.