The Brave Babes Battle Bus - We're All Going On A Sober Holiday!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Brave Babe's Bus. This is a bus full of drinkers old and new, sober and not, and those who are somewhere in between.

We are all at different levels of sober so you can bet that one of us has walked in your shoes.

If you want advice and support then you're in the right place.

Come take a seat or just lurk, we're happy to have you along for the ride.

And here is a link to the last thread so you can catch up on the journey so far HERE

Wise words Mouse, I tend to "think too much" as well.

SAF I am sure you do look brighter and you sound it too. Grapes are a lovely refreshing way to get a little sugar, or ripe strawberries, or juicy pineapple, hmmm, I feel a fruit salad coming on . . .

Mouse a primary teacher once told me that nits hate hairspray, so once you've got rid of them you could spray Nemo to prevent him getting reinfected. (His hair, that is, not him)

Afternoon.

I drank last night. A fair bit. But that's ok. I am just not going to do the same today. Lots of pregnancy and baby talk.

So. .

When pg I was under recurrent miscarriage clinic and lucky enough to have two scan at 7 and 9 weeks. At 11.5 weeks I started bleeding. Couldn't get nhs appt so went private. DH sat with DD in reception. We were sure it was for reassurance but I needed it. Huge relief that I saw baby's heartbeart, lovely legs kicking about. Then doc said he needed to re scan. Baby had severe anencephaly and would not make it to due date. I cannot describe the pain at moment. They arranged termination for two days later. The horror of it all still haunts me.

Oh MsGee, my heart goes out to you

Hi MsGee, I am a lurker on this thread, I saw your last post and had to reply....I had the same thing happen to me at 12 weeks pregnant (different diagnosis though).

I don't think the shock, horror and disbelief ever really leaves us. Sending you kind thoughts today xx

MsGee - I am right there with you my lovely, sitting next to you holding your hand and remembering the pain. I promise you that it will ease over time, it truly will. You will never forget that little one, you never could.

Something that I have felt helped me is to have a memorial for the boys. We have two now, a Cherry tree and a Christmas tree. I wanted the Christmas tree so that we can put three little baubles on and some lights each Christmas in the garden and see it from the house.

The Cherry tree is further down the garden but beautiful in the summer. I go and talk to them sometimes. I'm sure the neighbours think I am bonkers!

It's just nice to wander down there, nice cool drink in hand and talk to them about Nemo or DD or about my day....... just us. I miss them all the time and it's always worse around the anniversary (Sept 28th) but I know that you are strong.

You will get past this point once you are ready too. Lean on your family, friends and us. We'll hold you up best we can, dry your eyes and keep you safe. My heart breaks for you sweetheart xxxx

msGee so very sorry for your loss. I don't know what else to say except thinking of you.
m

MsGee - another thought, have you posted in Bereavement? There are posters in there too who are full of support and understanding xx

"the best analogy for grief i heard is that the hole made by the loss doesn't shrink at all and it's no good pretending that it does, however life continues growing around the hole so that it is a smaller proportion of who you are as time goes on. i can't explain it well, it made sense at the time."

You explained it just right saf

Sorry that you went through the pain of losing a baby too

There are lots of us out there I see.

Yes, saf avoid that pub!!!

Thankyou lovely ladies

MrsKing thank you - I am so sorry you have been through this too. It's an absolute minefield of emotions eh?

saf thank you and sorry for your loss - there is no need to compare, all pg loss is horrific

mouse thank you my lovely, your words mean a lot to me. I haven't tried the bereavement board but may do in time. There was a funeral for the baby (I didn't go - only found out the date by chance from hospital - day before and it was in another county). I will visit the garden of remembrance there one day.

obrigada and demented thank you. The support from this board means so much to me.

Phone about to run out of juice - back later xxx

LOL at waxing ya tash!

Well, I have now a short crop of orange hair. Fecking L'Oreal. Good job I've got a dark brown in just in case!

Off to remove my Duracell battery look!

There could be some truth in that Fair ... about nits not liking hairspray ... my youngest daughter had an ongoing battle with nits, but once she hit the age where the mirror became her best friend and hairspray, gel, mousse etc became a necessary part of her routine, not even a single nit has been brave enough to make an appearance

hugely unproductive nursery time. have sat around on the computer drinking pop and getting annoyed with people who are wrong on the internet

sorry this is saf btw. namechange brought on by another thread

SAF/SCF are you referring to us MNers?

especially those twats over on the feminism boards fairenuff

right off to get boy and deliver cake and hope i don't bump into alcohol out there.

Duracell battery look - hope you are back to your usual self soon Mouse!

SAF - well done for last night and today. No thinking would also be my suggestion. Keep busy. House gets tidier; bits of self care like you've done today; baking - probably 3 of my favourite things that have taken me lots of goes at early sobriety to get doing and you've found them in 2 days! Also, for now give in to the sugar cravings (plenty of time for that) and absolutely no going into your head without adult supervision.

I have also started doing jigsaws, rediscovered various crafty projects, and started some proper studying again.

I've had a really emotional day, and guess what, it's ok! It's ok to feel like this. Ok to not know sometimes. To feel intensely and not drink. I'm exhausted though! Going to get myself out the door to a meeting anyway - any lengths and all that. I've also got a puncture which I am now off to repair else will not get to said meeting.

Love to all, hope you all have safe sober Friday nights, let's all be waking up positive and clearheaded for the weekend :) x

See you all on Monday, finishing work in 10 mins and no internet at home but just want to wish everyone a peaceful weekend, and as Noteven says "no going into your head without adult supervision":) Going to take her advice and keep busy!

thanks for tips noteven.

boy was collected, parents visited and cake delivered (lovely apparently), dog has been showered after rolling in feck knows what they've been spreading in the fields, boy has been allowed to play like a messy 4 year old without me getting irritated or leaving him to it and i've survived the worst of a hideous ibs pain attack presumably brought on by the shock of eating more than one meal in a day.

i had dinner at my parents and to my horror they opened a bottle of wine, i had a glass of juice and my dad asked if i was ill or something ha ha. was very hard work to sit through the meal with the bottle in front of me and not say oh i'll have one glass actually but i did it - surprised myself there but even though i had a massive urge i didn't want to ruin this.

shortly off to my bed which the boy is asleep in.

hope the hair is looking better now mouse.

thanks everyone

Morning everyone.

Some sad reading here - I'm thinking of you MsGee, and everyone else who's gone through this.