The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Christmas Party (part 2)

[TheMousefaceBeforeChristMouse]

Hello

I'm Mouse.

Welcome to the Brave Babes Bus - Gerald! Blame Silver for the name!

We are a group of MNers who post about our relationship with alcohol and how drinking it, or not, has an effect on our day to day lives.

Come and meet the other Brave Babes, say hi, take a seat or just read.

Here are the threads so far

Jesus you make me thank you!

Best thing for man flu is lemsip with honey and a cosy sofa and blanket with some crap TV thrown into the mix Hope you feel better real soon.

Just popping in for a mo, back later, but have just read your post TES

BF I DON'T THINK SO .

If he was that drunk he wouldn't have been able to do anything, would he?

I truly cannot believe anyone would do that with you and DD upstairs, they deserve no compassion. No wonder you tried to blanket your feelings.

He and she sound like complete sh*ts nasty peices of work.

Zany thank you for wise words maybe I shouldn't give myself such a hard time, I think he thinks because it was so long ago (last summer, but the one who must not be named told me in Feb) that I should be over it.

Anyhow I am in the driving seat now - no more drunken outbursts and cool / calm deliberation about what is best for me and my DSs.

How are you Zany? You are wonderful asking about everyone else - hope that things are !

Tes - so sorry you are having a shit time. despite all that going on you saved me from myself yesterday. managed to go to bed without opening another bottle and feel fine today so thankyou!

Tes - So sorry. My XBF did the same with my verty first boyfriend. I was 17 and thought I'd be with him forever.

My BF at the time thought I'd never find out that one night, when he gave her a life home, she'd thank him by sucking him off.

Nice

'it's okay, I didn't come' Ha ha ha ha, well yes, that's alright then. Why do they say that?

Anyway, what you have to remember is that none of that was your fault. No matter what anyone tells you, you did not cause that to happen.

And, FWIW, I think that you are stronger than you realise if you have stayed and tried to work through this.

What mustn't continue, is him 'using' anything you do as a weapon against you, to 'justify' his behaviour.

Boundaries need to be drawn and NOT crossed.

His behaviour was and remains to be appalling. Not on at all.

Thurso I am going to sound like a deluded fool now but this is the only instance (I hope to God) in an 18 year realtionship. B4 I knew I would have thought it would be a complete no brainer - I would kick him out..........but I haven't and when we are sober all is well - I can bottle how crap part of me is feeling, but when drunk I let loose, the saying "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned (or whatever )" I think it was written about people like me.

This is such an amazing outlet for me you have no idea, as I am trying to make our marriage work I can't tell people in RL - they would never forgive him.

Thank you again brave babes

Dementedma you have made my day!! I am so happy that you went to bed and feel great today, you made that happen

TheMousefaceBeforeChristMouse why the hell do BFs do this ? It is such odd behaviour i would have thought? I can't imagine anything worse than giving some all of my BF's DH a BJ - yuk!!??

My XBF in question also admitted to have "cuddles" with my 2nd serious boyfriend when I went to Uni - she said he missed me and nothing that much happened!!??

This XBF doesn't have a DH, own home, job etc. I think she may have done this beacuse she wanted what I had?! I used to go round in circles trying to figure out why but have no interest in her anymore.

TES you don't sound like deluded fool at all, you sound as if you are considering things very carefully.

Who knows what they would do in the same position?

When I was 24 I had a boyfriend that I was sooo in love with, but he told me he couldn't see me over Christmas, as had lots of family things on. When I saw him the week after, one of his "friends" told me that he had been sleeping with someones au pair, for the festive season!! Well, I was so assertative, I just didn't mention it all, and when he finished with me, begged him not to .

I was so lucky to meet my lovely Dh, but I never take it all for granted, who knows what will happen to any us, and how we will deal with it.

Be kind to yourself.

I hope everyone is feeling ok today, Mouse how is Nemo?

Spot on Tes - jealousy.

My X told me himself what had happened when I dumped his sorry ass. He then spent six months stalking me, getting arrested, sitting outside my parent's house begging me to take him back, breaking into a house I was 'hiding' out at........psycho!

Later on in life, XBF did the same thing, tried to get my then boyfriend into bed by asking him to help fix her car, but when WE got there, she was half dressed!

Very sad and lonely no doubt.

assertive!

thurso

He slept through the night last night, in his own cot!!!!

Which meant I got some sleep too. He still has his cough and a runny nose, as do I and DD is in bed but we'll be fine as long as we all stay wrapped up warm!!!

How are you today?

Mouse that is scary behaviour from your X, did you have to get police involved? Your XBF and mine should get together and tell tales of all the lives they have ruined - or tried too.

Thurso glad you have a fab DH especially after the "festive period b'friend" - looking back at some of my past relationships I don't know why I kept of persevering to meet my supposed Mr Right.

Mouse I have read your profile and seen your beautiful family, feel that I know you a little bit more because of it can put your words to a face that doesn't sound creepy I hope - promise I am not some weird stalker / psycho woman!

Tes - yes, X was arrested twice and had an injunction not to come within a certain distance, or near to my house.

I had to be driven too and from work and one night, he sat outside my house flicking his lighter cap open and shut so my dad went out and 'removed' him.

I had to change my number and nearly lost my job through it all. He kept coming into work.

Not a very pleasent time!

And no, I don't think you are a stalker, I'd know!!!

well babes, im off to meeting - im battling through the snow (all half centimetre, its melting here) with double pnuemonia and swine flu and everything, i may be some time! , dont worry though, my red nose will guide me home if it gets dark!

sniff!

Cripes JWN!!

I missed your earlier man flu post. Sorry you are porrly.

It's all this warm/cold/warm/cold weather and going in and out of hot places.

Lots and lots of warm drinks, paracetamol or Lemsip - NOT BOTH - and snuggle up when you get in xx

oh btw, not the same as a stalker, but i dumped a fella once who cryed to my dad that he was going to ride his motorbike over a cliff - 'ok, piss off and get on with evel knieval, you're getting on my tits!' says my everso sensitive dad!

mouse - i think i will live! , just a drama queen really!

And if we are taling snow, we had 12 hours of it last night so have a fresh 6 inches on top of all that we had.

Thank God, I can stay in today!

Although we are waiting on a delivery of feeding equipment for Nemo. If it doesn't get here, we'll have to go up to the hospital, beg for some of their stock and come back.

Buggeration.

I guess some women forget the sisterhood codes:-

Never do anything with a friend is with/in love with
Don't let a bloke come between friends
Don't drop a friend when someone new comes on the sceen.

I can't get over your XBF Mouse and Tes - it must feel like a double betrayal (where's spell check)

Thank you for your comment Tes. Although I feel crap at times and have often sometimes posted self pitying comments generally I am good just feel lonely at times.

Glad you and Nemo got a good nights sleep Mouse

Just heard from the garage and best case senario is £500 [swearing icon]

Jeez Zany!!

That is a lot of money. Is it worth asking for the details of what's wrong and ringing around other garages?

I know your parents have used these guys for ages but still...........

Eeeekkkkk!

Fingers crossed Mouse that your delivery arrives, if not are you good at driving in snow? Here in the south it has all been washed away but when I did venture out I slid through two sets of red traffic lights Glad your dad sorted out stalker man

JWN good luck at meeting.

OK I am off for a bit to tend to DSs who seem surgical attached to Wii and as such cannot get themselves refreshments or wholesome XMas snacks

My grumpy helpful XH did say this morning that if its the ECU it could be £1000 so am pretty confident that I'm not being ripped off.

Hope you feel better soon JWN last time I was ill I got a behind the counter Nurofen cold and flu treatment which worked really quickly.

My XP (the emotionally abusive one) slept outside my house in may car when I first split with him in January and used to tell me it would be my fault if I found his frozen body the next morning. I had to get the police involved in the end but stupidly got back with him in the summer {big fool icon]

Zany sorry about your car and that I have no advice, don't even know what an ECU is!

Sorry to hear about your XP, being a bit new to this thread I am a bit behind thought have been trying to catch up on the previous posts. I hope you have some RL support as sometimes nothing beats a proper RL bearhug.

Right......must remove myself from MN and feed/water kids

Yes, DD is hovering around looking 'bored' which in almost a teenager speak is hungry.

Must go and feed her and dose her up.

Hi all. Just checking in. I wrote a big long message this morn at about 7am and then lost it .
Tes I'm not surprised you have been losing it with dh when pissed and good on you to try to deal with the shitty situation sober. I try deal with all my shit when pissed so trying to be mature and deal with my emotions. I'm really crap at it. Trying my hardest though.

Zany sorry to hear about the car. Is it worth fixing?
Make sure all you poorly people take the lemsips. I've been put on antibiotics for the xmas period so great reason not to drink without drawing attention to myself.