It's all about......ME! :)

[BibiBlocksberg]

Hello to all and a Medal for those of you that stayed over all 16 pages of the 'It's all about him' thread.

Since it has gotten so big and since I will most likely going to be droning on about this for a little while I thought it would be easier to just start a new thread.

Must say I prefer the new title

For those that didn't read the mammoth previous thread, in a nutshell it's about me dithering to leave partner of 8 years. No sex life for a year, he's very self centred and unmotivated etc, no future to speak of, fed up.

Finally told him I want to split up last night so am now using MN as my lifeline to ensure I really do get out of this excuse for a relationship.

Thank you all again for letting me do this and your support :)

A snowsofa I really have heard it all now.

Might attempt that myself tomorrow :)

I once saw sofa, armchairs, coffee table etc. Looked excellent!

Ha a whole living room set! I'd be very tempted to put it on freecycle and then laugh hysterically at peoples faces.

Could advertise it as occasional furniture and it would be true - sort of.

Oh dear, time to stop with the vino perhaps :)

Occasional furniture - v good!

Agree about Mark Darcy. In fact same with Mr Darcy in P&P. I worry about What Happened Afterwards...

Thanks Katisha, was kind of congratulating myself on the occasional furniture quip

I don't know, laughing at my own jokes, tut, saddo :)

Great new thread - it's good to get it all down on 'paper' where you can come back and read all of the good things about it, in case you get a low moment - but I hope you don't - I hope it's all up from here :)

I'd treat myself to a lock change on Monday - money well spent :)

Just bloggedy blog blogging again.....

Braved it to the supermarket even though snow fairly thick here and most of it gone to ice overnight (am normally a massive chicken)

Got really annoyed as I am so incredibly broke until next thursday it's not even funny.

Just got me thinking and a bit angry really. As always he comes out of this stinking of roses. Stashed away at this mothers with no further financial commitments, sat with his 'first love' the playstation, meals cooked for him.

When I think about the amount of money I lost over the years because he wouldn't pay his way, whenever he was ill or unemployed, the years I paid for the majority of our food etc etc etc.

Probably wouldn't be so bloody irritating but one of his main concerns when he finally moved out was that he wouldn't have to pay for the phone line rental etc anymore. And he was very quick to point out he wouldn't be paying any more rent since it's paid in advance.

Don't get me wrong, I AM grateful that he's gone and gladly pay my way in life. Just unsettles me when I've barely got £15 to my name for a week.

Forgot how scary single life can be when there's no one else to turn to if anything unexpected happens.

You couldn't really "turn to" him though, could you ?

Except on a very superficial level

You were the one that carried everything, and you will have no problem continuing to do so, on your own

No, you are right there AF and I do tell myself that he was a mere 'ghost' in my life.

A bloody noisy and expensive ghost mind :(

any contact from him this weekend ?

Nope, not a peep.

Can't decide whether that's a good thing or not.

Weird thing to say I know but it still rankles me that he's just able to walk away just like that.

Jeez, maybe I'm just a total egomaniac??

Can't want him gone and constantly in touch at the same time telling me how devestated he is can I.

He hasn't walked away scot free, though Bibi. He has nothing. Whoop de do, his Mum is cooking for him - I bet she is also nagging him. He has gone back decades in terms of where a man his age should be. He has no home of his own. It is pathetic.

Don't forget, the best revenge is living well. Be happy and DO all the things he has held you back from doing. It will seem dark at times now - it IS bloody dark and depressing at the mo, but picture yourself swanning round in the spring with a few months between you and these events. You are going to be happy happy happy!

You may only have £15 (get yourself on the Martin Lewis website to get help with a new budget!!) but you have MANY people who care about you. Me for one, and I haven't even met you! Bet he coudln't produce two friends to rub together to make a third...

Chin up, lovely lady.

Chin up Bibi, who cares what he's doing? Are you interested in the day-to-day doings of any other stoners with commitment problems? I think not. So why this one? He's as boring as the rest of them.

Elfpants, I am in awe. The quality of your advice is excellent, even when you're pissed

Ah, thank you Nora, just what I needed tonight.

I've been doing quite well really pottering about doing my own thing.

In the past I would have been absolutely floored by the seperation, emotion of it all and would have probably contacted him by now.

Just get hit by random 'it's not fairs' and feeling a bit isolated (even though I instigated this whole split)

"but you have MANY people who care about you. Me for one, and I haven't even met you! Bet he coudln't produce two friends to rub together to make a third..."

That really means a lot to me, thank you for saying it :)

@ ElfPants stumbling in.

I made a thread in your honour when I finally remembered it was your birthday.

It was over in AIBU but refused to keep going.

Probably cos people aren't used to your Elf name.

I care about you too x

Wow - you too AF??

Alright, out with it, how much sunday night alcohol have you consumed???

Thank you v. much though, drunk or not :)

Awww thanks so much! The cake is particularly exciting. Would love to be lifting yet another glass with all of you this evening. :)

I have had a couple

A couple of bottles

Just projecting over here.

Glad you liked the cake ElfPants, you'll have to tell us all about your birthday exploits tomorrow :)

Off to bed since it's a 'school night' for me.

Sleep well everyone!

I care too and I am very proud of you.

You are doing great and will have a lovely Christmas doing what you want, eating and drinking what you want and having the telly on what you want .

Oh well done you... Make a list of all the things you want to do and get going, don't look back. You can't be happy in a bad relationship but you can be very happy single. Good look with everythign an happy Christmas... x

hey, YB, how's you ?

Hello, may I stop by? Anything left in the bottle from last night? Eww, it's all vinegary.

If the guy can move back to his mum's with no regrets it proves that he never did give a shit about you. Not a slight on your worth but on his total self-centredness. Therefore, if guilt ever tries to sneak in and sap you, just remember he hasn't lost anything he really valued. He's still got his Playstation and someone to cover the bills. It's such a small life but then, he's such a small person. You have no need to feel sorry for him, ever.

Btw I chortled over you calling him Lazarus on the other thread - thought I'd say so belatedly, because no-one acknowledged it and it was funneh. Unlike Lazarus, though, the Cap'n seems to prefer his nice cosy coffin, so he's crawled back into it. Each to their own. You don't sound like someone who's ready to be buried with the Living Dead for a few decades yet.