Am I right in my conviction, lovely DP has done something unforgivable and I really think we're over

[IDontLikeDisciples]

We went out with a big group of friends yesterday afternoon,long pub lunch as most were off work due to the snow, he went home as he started to feel unwell.

I had a seizure in the loo, was taken to hospital by ambulance(this has happened a few times and is being investigated, possible epilepsy). DPs best friends wife came with me, made sure I was okay and was generally lovely.

I came home to a horrid email from DP, heres part of it

THANKS A FUCKING LOT, had half the village ringing me when I was ill in bed thanks to another of your 'episodes'. Can't believe you dragged Laura to the hospital in this fuking weather. You really worried people. I've had no sleep as the phone was contstantly ringing. Sort yourself out.

No 'oh my god are you okay?' etc Just that shower of shite.
I am stunned by this. What would you do?

I would ask friend not to make sleeping together jokes/ comments on face book.
You both may know it means nowt but it is gossip fodder and open to misinterpretation

I can't leave it, he is threatening to 'make people pay' wtf?

He has said I'm angry with him because his ex has clearly twisted my mind about him. I am so worried he's going to do some nasty things to peole that really have nothing to do with the situation.

Bloody hell. He's a nutter.

Pag, Ollie has already called me and apologised, wasn't thinking, it was indeed a private joke but not wise given everything thats going on and didn't expect a ranty message from P who he barely knows....

TBH, Ollie wasn´t wise to post about it at all on FB.

Most adults wouldn´t give out that sort of information even "thoughtlessly" imo.

Sure. Not a judgement on his intent. Just suggesting you may want to mention it. But if he already realises it was poorly judged then it won't be problem in the future, I'm sure

STofSE, block the loser from facebook, block his e-mails, delete his messages before you read them and tell your friends/family not to pass on any messages from him. If he is threatening call the police and let them deal with it.

Do not give this guy any more energy. He clearly feeds off it.

I can't leave it, he is threatening to 'make people pay' wtf?

He's saying that so you won't leave it

Don't let him control you

"I can't leave it, he is threatening to 'make people pay'"

But that´s really not your concern tbh.

He´s shown himself to be an out & out bastard-at least where you´re concerned.

Why would you give a stuff what he says or thinks anymore?

Don´t make a drama where there is none.

Yes, you need to stop picking at the scab.
If you want your dc back in your custody then you very definitely need to (hate to say this) grow up, step up to the mark, ditch the losers in your life, forge good relationships with people who can help you.

Well my dad has just adminestered some tough love, andf fuck.

He is right, the DC are happy and thriving wih exH, I know they miss me but maybe I'm a bit damaged to care for them at the moment.

I can't even believe I'm admitting this to myself let alone to tothers, but I might need to just accept whats goig on.

fuck.

This is like reading a teenagers diary melodramatic and all very cringeworthy.

++++My dad has said he wants to put me into rehab, So I'm forced to confront things, buy myself, without other people affecting me at all.

But that seems scary.

I actually fel I must do that, but how will court look on it?

And te thought of not seeing DC scares me to death

presumably your dad is offering to pay for rehab? might it not be an idea to use that money to pay for more intensive support for you in the community - regularly private clin psych appointments for example - just having some sort of inpatient treatment sounds rather drastic....

oh and get off facebook. root of all evil. (well not quite, but seems to be contributing to the problems in your life)

No ex knows i drank way too much when I was with him and it was on/off hen when we broke up.

I used to take Es and coke but haven't for over 2 years.

Ex driniks whicky ever night and takes coke at work.

I am thinking that rehab would be really good thing, but I'm terrified I'll let them down, it will be a big financial and emotional investment....

I agree with secondcoming. She is saying it how it is and perhaps you need to hear it.

Il sit down with my parents, speak to solictor and see whats for the best.

But, actually rehab seems like an inviting prospect, otr is it that it's another escape freom reality/

If you think it will help you then go. Do you have a good relationship with your Dad? If so then maybe he is right, you need some impartial help to sort yourself out.

Relationship and drama wise you sound in a very similar place to where I was just after I separated from exH. I was very lucky with the friends I had around me, one of whom was a counsellor and I slowly climbed out and found out who I was and also learned to value myself and my needs.

I hope you get whatever help you need x

If rehab is on offer then take it, I would just look into whether you can have weekly "day release" to see your dc and perhaps go to one nearer where they are at the moment.

The now ex boyfriend is a completely narcisstic fruitcake as far as I can see!

Be brave x

TC's idea of ongoing weekly support sounds worth looking into - I think you're right, OP, that rehab could be another escape from reality. Away from unhelpful friends/email/facebook, things will look more positive, but then you could easily slip back into old ways once you come out.

Anyway, while you're re-evaluating your life, spend less time on fb and more on mn with rl decent friends, and have a fun, relaxed time with your DCs tomorrow. And good luck.