The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Homebrew In The Shed!

[HammerMouseOfHorrors]

Hello, I'm Mouse.

Welcome to the Brave Babes Bus. You can get on at any point in the journey, there is plenty of room, it's free to ride and there is always someone who will be along to hold your hand over the speedbumps!

So, no matter where you are in your quest to quit the booze, join us for support, advice and a fair few laughs along the way

There is no judging, no cliques, just real poster with real problems being real and honest!

Come and meet the others.....

Here is the previous thread where you can read all of the threads so far, including JWN's original thread and the reason we are all here.

Well not sure if I'm hormonal, depressed or missing the booze but my normally sarcastic work colleague was being as sarcastic as ever this morning and I told her to give it up and that I was fed up everyone throwing stuff at me to do and if it didn't stop I was going home, she asked was I serious, I said I was, she said she was only joking, and I ended up going outside and having a weep . . never cry!!

Bloody hell look at my spelling!! Gina Ford could write.

Not sure if I should blame it on baby brain or Blossom Hill brain

Very very well said, Mrs Gee. We are all different. Whatever anyone says, it is their own story, one anecdote, not data. My link to the Observer is about a writer who went to one AA meeting, had a long night of the soul there and then, and never drank again. I doubt this is typical.

This is what Mouse said to someone last night.

'You're no different to any other poster on here. And let's face it, you would have bought wine tonight anyway. Regardless of it 'being on offer'.

You know as well as I that you can get wine for cheaper than that.

You wanted a drink and that's fine. You are an adult, you are in control.

If you want to have wine, have some. How much have you had? '

I thought it was such good advice that I nearly cut and pasted it latish last night for Demented. No one can come onto this thread hoping to be scolded or treated as a naughty child. Mouse and Venus and all are so far from the scolding parent/GP and that one of the strengths of this. I know that if I were halfway through a bottle of wine and got shouted at I would be inclined to finish it. I think that eventually the words of Mouse and Venus in particular will be made into a Mumsnet book.

Demented. Surely you feel that you are on a downward spiral, in terms of the amount of alcoholic units you are consuming over a week? The metaphor I would use for myself would be a very old car conking slowly out. You know, brum, brum, sputter, chug, chug... out. Not like the writer in the Observer who stopped just like that (which is dangerous, by the way). I think that WasIndie posted on the last thread that she was 'only' (only!) ever on day 4 but when she looked back over the time since the blessed JWN started this series of threads, her number of units consumed had dramatically diminished.

(Hope I haven't misrepresented anyone and hi! to Algae, was thinking of you. And Venus, you and Mouse give out such fabulous advice sometimes that I feel humbled. I missed you when you were in Delhi).

morning all!, still feel yuck so im at home today - just had a look round this house , some cleaning is on the cards today!

thurso, i would wrap the fish in tin foil after squeezing a lemon/rock salt/pepper/put lemon wedges in it and a dribble of veg stock over the it! steams quite nicely!

btw, poor sleep, spotty skin, bad dreams, i had them all! it does get better i promise!

also, some things about dh have been thrown in sharp relif!, he can be selfish, a know all, and a total pig at times - the thing is, cant we all?, i just have to tell myself that he is a human, with faults, but the good parts of him out weigh the bad by tons!! , being sober means that i can see his faults, and mine!, rationally, i dont go into a huge temper tantrum etc, just accept the faults and move on! (thats not to say that im a doormat! OH NO!! )

ALGEE - GOOD LUCK MY LOVE!!! THINKING OF YOU!!

see you all later, off to do battle with some dirt!!

Remember HALT. If you are hungry, angry, lonely or tired, you may be more vulnerable to temptation.

Wasie, hope you're not still slumped at your desk. I always find that lots of coffee helps. Demented that would be such a help bottling the crappy feeling and using it every time you feel the urge! Hubba, I have tried eating chocolate or whatever when I get The Craving and it does work sometimes. Guess it's better to be fat through chocolate than booze. Perhaps one day we could all meet for tea and cake :)

I think the reason I didn't finish the bottle last night is because I felt really pissed - hadn't eaten since lunch-time. That's unusual for me, I'm usually the last one standing....

Desire, well done for not blubbing publicly, I hope you feel better.

Hey guys,

deleted my last msg, as I chatted away, and then thought "too much information"!
Any number of people I know could be on here, which would be just as awkward for them, as for me. It's the annonyminity that keeps it true!

TA that's what I liked about drinking, falling unconcsious asleep without thinking, (bit sad really). What I do now is think about specifics ie: what to wear, what to cook for dinner, and then try to switch off (easier said than done).

Someone said a while back that s*x is better sober (it is the morning, after all!), but see my post re:Dh falling asleep at 9.30!!

Mrs Gee's comment about all being different. I don't keep alcohol in the house. (Hence admiration for you Dipso) That is what works for me. I always, ALWAYS keep chocolate in the house. I hardly ever eat it, in fact, I hide some to give to dp when he gets desperate. I need to know that the chocolate is there. (It is on top of the cupboard above my sink.) I am slim have never had any weight worries. I am just so different on those two approaches.

I do like to know that there is a magnum in the freezer. Not for everyone. That's what works for me, not necessarily for anyone else.

thurso I used to really like that too (the falling asleep) as I thought it made life better and less stressful.

Not preaching but for me, that was wrong. I had a period of a few weeks when I thought ...

• life is just the same without drink, why feckin bother, DD still difficult, still struggle at work etc. etc.
• I am giving up the booze FFS, why is not suddenly perfect???

MIFLAW is v good on this and pointed out to me that its just life and that not drinking means you have a period of adjusting to reality. It took me a while. Now I am genuinely less stressed when I go to bed, because I have the smugness of knowing I did my best that day. I may have found DD hard or work difficult but its not because I was hungover etc., its because its life.

The last two months have been really hard for me, DD was having a very bad time, I put in complaint to her nursery which resulted in a whole heap of shite, I moved house, I had tons of work on, DH was working long hours, you name it. But not drinking meant I had more strength to deal with it. Honest.

This week I am scared I am getting a chest infection. I had a bad one last year. Knocked out for a month, got sinisitus, couldn't work, lost income, got some other complication which was horrible. Breathing was painful. Sleep impossible. Three lots of antibiotics, inhalers etc. I drank throughout. And moaned about not getting better.

This week I worry about getting ill and not being there for DD but if I do I know that I will get ABs again, use inhalers and will get better without complications. I will be stronger for not drinking.

Its life. Being sober doesn't mean I won't get ill. It just means I will cope better when the shit happens.

Same goes for everything in life

(hope that makes sense).

ps and we have alcohol in the house. DH drinks still (but less than he did when I was topping up his glass every 15 mins!).

I have non alcoholic beer which I have 3 or 4 nights a week (the 0% stuff, not the 0.5% stuff!). It helps as 1) it preserves the ritual of doing something after a long day and b) it was never my tipple, so less connotations. I could never have 0% wine, I'd be back drinking within a couple of days.

Afternoon Brave Babes.

Looks like we are off to hospital after all with Nemo, this week or next. Lots of tests and maybe surgery if the meds fail. Will keep you posted.

algee - fab to see you back lovely, and good luck. xx

JWN - sorry you are still feeling like deep fried dog shite, but at least it's not down to booze!! Try and rest. xx

I have read through the posts and feel that there are a lot of ups and downs being shared, but a lot more positives than of late!! I can see that there is a lot of forward thinking and that's great.

Yes, some of you have slipped but the great thing is, you have posted about it and NOT hidden it! That in itself is HUGE!!

thurso - it's JWN who says sex is better sober and I have to agree. For years I would only ever feel confident in bed with a man when I'd had a good few 'stiff ones' (oh-er, missus! ) but these days, I love sober sex with DH. I have realised just how many emotions I have missed out by blurring them out with booze.

And that goes for all areas of my life actually. Up until now, I never realised just how intense my emotions are when they don't all roll into one big blur of alcohol driven sadness.

Have any of you ever been drunk and stayed happy for the entire time you were drinking? Never got to that maulding stage or the 'woe is me' stage?

I've not. I have always gone down after the initial highs. Life and sole of the party me, always the one to be up dancing all night, surrounded by people, all chatty and happy, smiley and fun.

Until the downer hit. Then I was the one crying into my glass for no good reason. I was the annoying drunken bird that men avoided and women hated. Without fail. And that would also happen I home. I didn't need to be out to get like that.

Something else I don't miss.

Sorry for the epic post!

Hello all.

Afraid I'm at Day 1 again. A friend turned up unexpectedly last night with a bottle of red at my danger time (children just tucked up in bed) and it threw my plans out the window. I had a mini panic thinking what excuse I could make but really I think it gave my mind the excuse it wanted.

But I had one small glass (2 units) and sipped and she drank the rest of the bottle so I felt a little in control. Today though I can feel that it's woken the demons so am planning for tonight.

Am going to have a bath, then a hot chocolate, then an early night. If any friends turn up I'm not answering the door :o

Any ideas for good excuses for impromptu drinking offers?!

Cross posted Mouse - hope Nemo will be ok x

Hey Mouse, hope everything goes ok for Nemo! Make sure to keep us posted.

Clearmiss well done on sticking to the one glass:)

ClearMiss I am going out on friday with friends & plan on telling them I am taking anti biotics for a mild virus so I can't drink alchol.

I drink less when I am out, my demons wait behind the sofa for me.

Mouse Sorry to hear that Nemo has to return back to the hospital & I hope all goes well for you < off to search for a hug icon, there must be one lurking around some where? >

Thank you all.

Well done ClearMiss

TA - I am looking forward to the day when you change your name to something more positive but understand why you are staying as you are

Afternoon you lovely lot :) sorry to hear your ds is having a tough time Mousey. How was everyone's weekend? My kids went back to school today, feels really quiet lol

Hey loopy - DD went back yesterday and I nearly did a little dance!!!

Mouse It will be one week tomorrow night since that dreadfull night, I know I have drank since then - hence why DH is not so pleased with me - but I have felt in control & aware of my intake which is something I didn't do before, before I drank to get pissed & out of it, that was my aim.

If I manage to get to friday I will change my name.

Something along the lines of: Thouroughlyfuckingpleasedwithmyself

Like it?

LOVE IT!!!! I am looking forward to Friday! Good luck honey x

I am starving!! Why am I so hungry? I never normally eat anything more than a couple of biscuits with a cup of tea during the day & then my dinner in the evening but not today.
Today I have had an egg mc'muffin meal (couldn't resist the smell on my way through town. a sandwich, 2 slices of fruit loaf & 3 sticky ribs & I am still hungry?

I weighed myself today, something I never do & I am just under 10 stone. That is nearly 2 stone of wine with very little food hanging around my waist

Hey Wasindie - Nemo says 'ergpbopohughgh' which is Nemo for thanks!!

Glad to see I'm not alone in the "twistofbonkers" behaviour whilst drunk then!!

And, Red is still off work so no internet, she sends her love to the Brave Babes.