The Braves Babes Battle Bus - NOT stopping at the pub!!

[Mouseface]

Hello

I'm Mouse. I've been sober for over a month now, thanks to the support of posters on this and previous threads.

No matter where you are up to with your sobriety, you'll find someone here who has been in your shoes!

Come and meet the other Brave Babes........

And here are the other threads for those who want to read them.

JWN's original thread (and the reason we are all here!)

Thread two

Thread three

Thread four

Thread five

Thread six

well, I fell off the bus yesterday and am now kicking myself

DH came in yesterday with stuff to make tea and a bottle of red. Offered me a glass, I declined. About an hour later I thought 'why not? 1 glass won't hurt!' We polished off that bottle and then what did I go and do........trooped off to the shop for another.....which we finished also.

Felt like deep fried dog shite all day, headache won't shift and now back at square one.

What I have learnt is.....1 glass is never enough!

Day 1 again for me and today I WILL NOT BE DRINKING!

munky

Welcome back on the bus and to real life. If it was a simple as just stopping forever, with no wobbles, slips or falls from the bus, life would be so much easier, no?

Well done for posting. And for being honest.

Where would you like to sit?

Hi.

Well yesterday was ghastly to say the least as often happens with me my emotional hangover got worse as the day went on.

Went to get some food and stood and stared at a bottle of my favourite wine for at least 45 seconds telling myself its saturday it will be hair of the dog for tonight. I walked away from it and just managed to get through without getting in the car and going to the garage.

Day 2 today. Really pleased with myself for yesterday. DC back from thei Dads in a minute so I think I am safe for today.

Hope everyone else is doing ok x

SAF - only YOU can make that decision. Only YOU can see if you can control yourself through the week and just partake in a controlled way over the weekends.

I hope that you can. I'm glad you had a good night. xx

getting you have greater self-control than me, I practically dashed out the door to pick up another bottle last night

SAF sounds like you had a great night! Wouldn't it be fab if we could all do that.....no drinking through the week and be slow, steady, controlled when we choose! I hope you succeed

Mouse - thanks for saving my place

Hello to all who are around this evening.

SAF really glad to hear about your evening, sounds as though it was just what you needed. I don't know about others on here, but I am really cheered to hear about someone who has been drinking too much and who is able to do what you are doing and set limits and stick to it. I don't think that will be me, but I am glad to read about you being able to do it, and tbh I am so happy to know that not everyone who drinks too much has the same problems as I have. Please keep posting on here, it cheers me up and also helps to reinforce that I can't do 'normal' drinking.

munky, I think that is pretty much exactly what would happen to me, so thatnks for trying it out - now maybe I don't have to, 'cos you have shown what would happen.

Ahh. This bus is a good place to be. Lots to share, lots to learn, lots of mistakes, and lots of working out what each of us needs to do.

looking, yes I think I too could throw it all away, for too easily for the sake of one drink, and there are times when I am very, very tempted. I don't think I have ever felt so much in place where I am actually conscious of making a decision. Most big decisions are either so obvious *yes I will shag you" or are considered (job a rather thasn job b). But the decision to drink or not drink is a rel battle that goes on in my head moment by moment. It is not something I put off thinking 'oh I'll sleep on it and see how I feel in the morning' (ha - if only), and it is not something that is so 'right' that it is the only thing in the world that I should do.

Anyway, my decision for NOW is that I will not be drinking today (although it doesn't stop me having to make that exact same decision in 20 minutes time, all over again).

Silver yes I am a bike widow, and a mountaineering widow, and anything else that involves strenuous exercise.

Hi mouse what a lovely man your dh is, to look after you so kindly. I bet he would not have been so forgiving and nice if you'd had a self-inflicted hangover! Now there's another excuse to be sober.

luci please just keep on coming back and talking to us. Tell us what is going on in your struggle, tell us why you think that drinking is making it any better. Just come and sit on the bus - you don't have to join in the singing.

Getting, at least you didn't drink until you were home on Friday. It may not have been a great date but at least you didn't have 'beer goggles' on, you could have found him funny and desirable and attractive, and things could have been so much more depressing . Hell, I even find myself good looking when I'm drunk.

But joking aside you know that drinking loads doesn't make any of it feel better. I know.

Thats true Venus !

Munky you only did that because you had had the first drink iyswim, my restraint was at 3pm

SAF at your control but that may yet be me.

Mouse I love reading your posts I cant believe you have been sober for only a few weeks you sound like a very wise old owl on the subject!

Hello to everyone else will try and become a more supportive member of the thread.

hi all, just a quick one, i wanted to look in and say hello - this weekend has been lovley and awful - lovley as dh and i have spent some proper time chatting, having a laugh - awful in that i have lost a friend, he was a good mate, a long term heroin addict, boozer, smoker, you name it - he was a huge character, a bloody pain at times, was larger than life - he was just getting his act together but ultimatly the lifestyle he chose caught up with him, a body can only take just so much abuse i suppose - i will miss him!

im off to bed now, promise i will be back to my usual self in the morning - just a bit sad tonight i guess - tell you what though, my friend was not a great deal older than me, it has really made me feel stronger in my resolve to keep myself on the 'sober and narrow', im just not ready for the off yet, got far too much living to do!

see you all in the morning lovley babes!

L XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

JWN

So sorry for your loss. It is always a shock, even when you know it is going to or could happen.

Sleep well lovely lady xxxxx

Am going to try again to stop tomorrow. I really am. Am tired of feeling awful. I need to give the AD's a proper chance to work.
Am sick of waking up in the early hours with my heart pounding.

Can I ask a question? Do your partners all think you have issues with alcohol?
DP thinks I just go OTT now and again and am a "lightweight" drinker. Ironic since I drink secretly as well as what he sees me drink.

I have to try and sleep. Early start no doubt with the DC's in the morning and already I have a hangover. Stopped drinking around 8pm.
Sleep well everyone.
Night. XX

I see that SAF's night out went well - glad to hear it and congrats, SAF.

However, as I do so hate to be misquoted (I'm a guru, dontchano?) and in case anyone else is reading, then

"and really? you believe no one over 21 goes out with a friend into town for a night out and the night out involves quite a bit of alcohol? that's just not my experience. nor that of what i read on here in people's lives."

isn't what I said at all. As you know.

What I said - and I was very specific about it - is that "this kind of occassion is about drinking to excess isn't it, it's what it's set up for - to go out and get drunk." is really a very odd way of thinking about an occasion unless you have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol.

Imagine it wan't wine, but food. A lot of people might SAY, "ah, what a night, we're going to eat some great food!" but imagine someone saying, "no, what this evening is ABOUT is the steak and chips. Fuck the conversation, fuck the music, the ambience, the lighting, the outfits - what tonight is ALL ABOUT is forcing as much fucking rare beef down my neck as possible. I mean, I'll probably vomit as a result, or maybe pass out - but that's what these nights are all about, isn't it?"

You would think that such a person was n absolute fucking freak and certainly no connoisseur of steak.

That is odd behaviour.

"DP thinks I just go OTT now and again and am a "lightweight" drinker. Ironic since I drink secretly as well as what he sees me drink."

In those two sentences you have the answer to all you need to know.

Be kind to yourself and pack it in.

MIFLAW! I went to university with a bloke who used to do just that - he used to go on 'food crawls'. Deliberately setting out to eat as much crap food as possible, knowing that eventual puking was inevitable. It was 'fun'.

He's now a fairly high-profile tv presenter . He was lightweight on the booze though, I could easily outdrink him ...

Morning everyone.

luci you asked about dp's views of drinking.... my dp knows I drink too much, and he is very happy that I am not drinking. Personally, he would probably not call me an alcoholic for a number of reasons:

• the social embarassment of having an alcoholic wife
• he does not know how much drinking I used to do in secret, and yes he was confused/surprised at times at how I could get drink on a glass and a half of wine (not knowing that I'd already downed a bottle)
• he did not, and cannot know what goes on in my head, how much drinking has preoccupied my thinking, how intensely I was watching the pouring of every glass to make sure I got my fair share, the plotting and planning that went on to make sure that I had 'enough' in the house etc. Even if he knew what was going on in my head from moment to moment, I'm not sure that he would recognise them as alcoholic thoughts, but he sure would think I was crazy!

JWN Hope you are doing OK this morning. And as you say, use your friend's experience to strengthen your resolve to live life as you want to live it. Take care of yourself, and do something nice.

Morning all,

Luci - DP would not describe me as an alcoholic. He believes we both drink a bit too much and could do with cutting down.......but as Venus stated " he does not know how much drinking I used to do in secret, and yes he was confused/surprised at times at how I could get drunk on a glass and a half of wine (not knowing that I'd already downed a bottle)"

JWN Sorry to hear about your friend. Stay strong.

Day 2 (again) for me and I will not be drinking today.

Good morning lovely babes, I managed to read some posts yesterday but did not get a chance to post myself. I am really sorry but I have now sped-read everything and have basically forgotten who said what. Doh! (JWN - I am really sorry for your loss x)

I had a lovely weekend, very relaxed and chilled.

To all those struggling: don't give up giving up!

Hopefully I will get the chance to chat properly to those of you who are around today!