Hello fellow dumplings,
Wide awake again at feed time - I'm not bothered by anything at the moment, just feeling wide awake as Anya has started doing about 4 hours for her first stretch and that's a long sleep for me these days so I wake feeling refreshed for a while!
Things are going well here. Took DS to the cinema on my own (with DD) yesterday as the weather was horrible in the morning. He loves to sit in the dark so it was quite relaxing other than the woman that came up to me and started trying to advise me on Gina Ford. Grrr! Off bowling with a friend tomorrow.
H and I would normally do a family thing on the bank holiday but he's moving his office tomorrow hence the outing with the friend. Still, he booked us tickets to a Thomas the Tank day at a Railway centre (DS is Thomas obsessed) in October, which should be lovely :)
Armbow - I completely know what you mean about the friend stuff, and how comforting it is to be able to retain some sense of normality. I would definitely advise setting yourself some boundaries at this point though. I know that although I spend a lot of time with H and we are very friendly, there's a line now. I do still love him, but as I have said before its like some strange nameless family member, not as a husband (although of course there are times when I could quite go for a hug - or more - just from the familiarity). What that means for me is that he can't push my buttons in the same way as he managed to before. Of course we know each other well and have nearly 12 years of ammunition to use to make the winding up easier, I just manage not to bite now. If he can still make you bite, or if it hurts to spend time around him, then I think you need to rethink things for your own sake.
Pink - so sorry to hear about those dreams. I often get that sort of dream about my family. In my case I'm screaming at them trying to explain stuff about how I feel but as normal they're not listening and I wake up feeling so frustrated and upset. These days thankfully they only seem to happen if I forget to take my anti-depressants! Hugs coming your way though. Remembering how you were when we had the last meet up, I would say it sounds like you do have some sort of addiction to your X. Have you had counselling? (can't remember sorry) It definitely seems as though it might help you.
All this match action sounds very exciting. I have signed up and get a few views but my profile isn't very interesting as I realised I'm not actually ready to move on just yet - I don't think anyone wants to go on a date with someone who has 99% of her thoughts about her children ;) Do you match people pay? Is definitely more than I can afford just to look at people or even to chat, but certain things just bring up a page asking me to subscribe. All this has made me think that I need to revive some of my old interests to give me something away from my kids in the long run. I used to love watching formula one, (or any motor racing live), and if I could leave Anya for a while I'd really like to do a part time course (I'm thinking Italian, just for a couple of hours a week, but I think it will have to wait until next September)
Tea - big hugs from me. Take a while for a wallow if that's what you need, and don't feel guilty about it. I think that repressing these feelings is as bad as dwelling on them for too long. We need time to let ourselves feel them before we can let them go or put them aside!
LC - I hope you're still lurking there, and we're here if you need us!
Waves to everyone else. Better get back to sleep now!