ALL NEW Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched No. 6

[gettingeasier]

Cant survive 5 minutes without this thread

littlecritter horah !!!! we missed you.

i have heard other people talk about this tiredness stage - apparently it hits you like a brick wall and you need to go with your body as the emotions of everything (not to mention your health scare) will have exhausted you.

Evening all
What a lot of talk about clothes. I like a bit of retail therapy myself so happy to join in with the chat on that.
I like lurking on Style and Beauty too so you will often see me there. Colours and clothes I'm into all of that and tallish.
Weekend of 25th is our preferred slot I think. Last time we had a girls chat time with lunch without DC's. Would that suit? Best thing I think is for anyone keen to CAT me. I have most email addresses of the vets but not the newbies. Once we have email addresses we can look at who lives where and work out best meet up point.
Waves to all - somewhere Starting will be doing flamenco. Tea are you still going away down south where you mentioned before for a hol or did that happen already and me forget it?

Happy - I have baby sitter all lined up for the 25th if necessary.

LC - if you think he is only coming back for his home comforts then you know the answer really don't you? someone said to me in the midst of everything with my h and it has really stuck with me.
"they have to beating your door down before you can even think of letting them back in to your heart."

Patience _ how is it going with the venture - anywhere nearer on premises?

LC - I'm only 5 ft 5.

Happy - I won't come to the one on 25th as it'd be a pig to find baby sitters for a whole day for me.

armbow, you are right. He is not beating my door down at all. He seems to think that if he stays away for a while it will a) blow over and b) serve as a suitable punishment for him. I asked him why he hadn't begged to come back home and he said that it wasn't his place to do so as he was in the wrong. I pointed out to him that he was in effect enjoying the single life with no responsibilities and I was left at home to pick up all the pieces so who is actually being punished here? Grr. At least he gave me £600 maintenance though . Was hoping for £400 so asked for £600 and he transferred it without a murmur. I've got to have my weekly trip to M & S foodhall you know .

Waves to all...........

Am alive, well & enjoying the delights of life. Am in hotel lobby & am trying to make sure eldest dd is not reading over my shoulder so have to keep this v tame. (grin)

Hope everyone is doing well.

LC best of luck with it all.

Ah Tea is a shame you can't come though. Wait a bit tho if you can as who knows what we'll work out on plan of attack at this point
LC good you have the dosh. Would he be able to finance a Dumplings short break do you think?
Starting, Buenos dias - chino upo and titos outos.
Waves to all

Oh no! You've got to be there tea, I can't be the only short-arse amongst all these Amazonian women. Please come. Did you manage to sort anything out about the card? If it makes you feel any better I forgot to watch an episode of Art Attack that my eldest ds appeared on about 10 years ago (he used to do tv work as a child). No matter, I thought, as CITV gave us a videotape of it. However, XH accidentally taped over it and I still haven't seen the episode to this day . I don't think it's had any lasting effect on ds.

Starting, you lucky thing. The weather here is rubbish this week. At least it is where I am. Things are always better when the sun is shining. Are you going to do a Shirley Valentine?

Happy, XP can't even finance himself let alone anyone else! He already owes me £18k for previous credit card debts and a new car. And now I have discovered he owes @£8k on more credit cards. When I write things like that I have to wonder exactly what it is that I'm missing about him .

Hope everyone else is having a good day. Waves to everyone and prays for a bit of sunshine this weekend.

Thats such a shame Tea like Happy says why not keep it free you never know ...

LC good to hear from you to XP spending habits.

Starting ooh good so you wont be incommunicado for 2 weeks then..have fun

I am feeling so much better and now feel I wasnt brooding for 4 days but finding stuff out in my head iykwim ? Wont bore you dumplings but suffice to say I am back to feeling I do have the mental strength and energy to get through the necessary stuff in the next few months.

I am starting to pack for activity holiday in Cornwall we leave on sunday for a week

I know I will probably be the only single parent there but thats ok just hope people are friendly to me anyway

BB live in Scotland ,by the way i am looking for bright colour make over i am 5' 3" a size 8 -10 depending on whether im smoking or non smoking i thought red jeans or stripy jeans would be fab looked at blue banana web site liked their long red tight shorts.
Happy will try my best re meet up just need to set up business,find new house ,rearrange schools/nursery and sort out where marriage is goin.So will pencil in the 25th
Just dont know where things are going with H probably slow train to nowhere but who knows,just not watched telly in 6mths and i like reading and need to do lots of sums just now[getting i have never been monetary minded in my life chose to work with animals so always followed my heart not my head but need to be financially in control now ,all part of my recovery road ]
So now i have bloody BRAVO on all the time and i truly hate it.Im just not the veg out type ,i aked for 50-50% but hes not interested on turning the telly off to give me peace 3 nites a week so thin end of the wedge really.Only asking him to meet me half way [he says im telling him what to do ],I just love peace after the kids TBH .
Im would just like someone to send me positive vibes in my own home and im not feeling it ATM but hey i guess its worth working on
Waves to everyone feeling a contemplation weekend coming on,busy weekend but last nite went well so some that is a positive well be sorted proper by Sunday.
Getting ...not so much hippy as earth person{dont know if its the same?] just dont know what all the greed is about ,bitching and jealousy ,just never got why folk are in such a rush and bothered about what others earn ,own etc
Waves to Startin hope flight went well x

BB" I live in Scotland" not a lifestyle suggestion

patience are you looking at Blue Banana.com

What's your colouring and general style anyway? And I will have a look for you xxx

oh my christ the 'o' buttn has gone funny.

Patience - lots of positivity to you.

Will try to make 25th

Getting - lovely to have great holiday to look forward to. Lots of smug marrieds wont have as good a time as you!

LC - sory about further debt disclosure - only bright point is to know about rather than not know - and youre not liable are you as not married?

Starting - hope that was the only tame part of your holiday.

Ab good to see youre are getting suitably retail corrupted by the dumplings.

Well visit was ok - but relative has just left after massive argument one night early. F! Oh dear! Cant say too much but Im disappointed but things had to be said - but didnt expect this outcome.

Patience - are you anywhere near Aberdeen? My parents and extended family are all from that neck of the woods - bit futher north, fishing town. I was born in England but am often told I have that Scottish/Irish look (the freckles help a bit too). I would love to be looking for a new house up there. Now, a meet up in Scotland would be just the ticket .

Getting, I think you are doing exactly the right thing in choosing an activity holiday. I'm sure you will find people to talk to. I took my eldest two to Majorca for a fortnight after my first marriage broke up and everyone was very friendly. Too friendly actually as I just wanted a bit of peace and quiet to read my books!

XP has been gone for a month now and not once has he phoned and asked how we are or can he help. I have seethed about this all day and drove down to his work and asked him to have ds for the weekend to give me a break. But of course he's playing cricket all weekend and the hotel will not allow any guests . And then he said "anyway, I thought I could move back in on Monday to help you and work things out" WTF!!!! I was speechless - very, very unusual for me. I feel totally bewildered. Where is he coming from? I just don't know. I just fancy going to bed tonight and not getting up until Sunday when big ds is 21. I have rented a city centre apartment for ds and his friends so I could have had the whole house to myself if XP could actually put me first for a change.

Oh well, I consoled myself by going into the staff shop - XP works for a very famous chocolate factory - and got 60 bars of milk choc, 10 bags of buttons, 14 caramel bars, 12 creme eggs, 14 bags of mini eggs and 3 big bags of giant buttons for £10. Anyone fancy some?

Mumfun, I missed that you were having a visitor. You don't sound as if you regret what was said so it must have been a positive thing for you. Is it a case of the truth hurts?

The debts don't surprise me. But I have a cunning plan. Whether we reconcile or not I am going to try to buy XP out of the house. I can knock what he owes of his share of the equity. I will then charge him rent if we are together. Does ours sound like a healthy, equal partnership? No, I don't think so either .

FFS LC what will they say at Slimming World when you've regained that entire 10 1/2 in a week

Well I think LC that you hit the nail on the head earlier that your XP now feels sufficient time has passed for this to have blown over and that he has done his time so now its time to move on. No chance of someone having ds for a sleepover so you get one night to yourself ?

So you live in Scotland Patience , I had sort of guessed from the odd wee in your posts .Hippy vs earth person probably not much in it think we might be quite similar ! Its a shame you wont make 25th but I guess you never know..

Mumfun that sounds ominous - large glass of wine later

Waves to all

Little Critter I can already hear what WWIFN would say to what your partner said. I hope you said no way are you moving back in yet. I also hope the book has arrived and you're wading your way through it.

Blimey LC, put in cool box and save til meet up. Chocolate is what every Dumpling needs. Your (X)H sounds a bit , methinks he may have to try harder if he wants you back.

MumFun, sorry you had bad time with relation - hopefully you will have a good weekend.

Patience, do hope you can make it down south. We need your serenity.

Beebers, what can you do with a 5,9. 12-14 pear? Apparently spring colours are for me. Love clothes actually, so maybe we need to arrange a retail event.

Getting, Cornwall should be fab

Xpost - waves to Tea

5'9 is nice tall model like height, I would go for something like this:

www.asos.com/Asos/Asos-Fitted-Waist-Sundress/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=938310&abi=1&clr=pink

www.asos.com/Warehouse/Warehouse-One-Shoulder-Ruffle-Dress/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=1277558&cid=8799 &sh=0&pge=0&pgesize=200&sort=3&clr=Black

Jeans and Nike hoodies,suits me fine BB just bright colours needed ,red for root chakra,need definate grounding vibrations,yep LC quite celtic looking but mid west of the country Aberdeen is north east .LC my advice is to keep pushing him away until you see some sort of change even then they will still try to go back into their rut ,if you dont like that rut whats the point ,i just dont see a change myself so think we will struggle to last the weekend .Just all part of the stress when i have so many decisions to make he just opts out completely ,that just gives me even more stress ,i have no control over any dept in my life ATM i think i will lose new house b4 we even see it because he is so indifferent to life.Huge commitment because even more rural ,bigger house ,I am so confused its just like x3 weeks ago,bought fags again.
MF if anyone said anything to you AT ALL that was inconsiderate i fully understand. I went into nursery today and told the boss that dd was prob leavingsoon,she said that dd will take it very badly FFS inconsiderate bitch ,does she not think i know that.I reminded her that i didnt choose any of this.

Aaaaargh - can I vent? I've been bubbling just under boiling point all day . Little ds is in a constant state of hunger and despite eating an adult sized meal plus loads of other stuff was saying "I'm still hungry" every 5 minutes. So I phone XP to have him for the evening - first time I've asked him to since he left a month ago and he says "sorry, I'm playing cricket...er...it's a bit awkward..er, how about tomorrow?" That translates to "actually I'm going out tonight" and when challenged he did actually admit that he's going out after cricket and I bet OW is involved somehow. So much for missing us! So I piled ds into the car and dropped him off at the cricket club, saying enjoy the barbecue and tell Dad I'll be back home about 10pm . Fucking wanker. Sorry, I promise not to swear at the meet up.

Good for you LC dont worry about swearing ,im def not coming to meet up if i cant swearbig reason for H coming home was if we still had hope to patch things up he wasnt having fucking nites out ,anyway hes still not home now so wouldnt be surprised if hes bored of familly life again ,he wont think twice about mucking us about because ,altogether now,"Its all about HIM"

Patience - you're sitting next to me at the meet up 'cos you swear, you're Scottish and I'm 3" taller . Mind you I'm probably 20 years older and 3ft wider .