🐠 Archers thread #135: An Everyday Story of Fishy Folk. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you would be delighted to be given a goldfish named after your ex, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please. We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4197199--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-6-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Apologies for ignoring the various title suggestions on the last thread. However, here they are, plus a couple of other pithy observations, to kickstart the new thread. I think it's fair to say nobody is looking on this as a Golden Era! Goldfish Era, though ...

@Roysnewshirt: Everyone wants more! Chris wants more Amy; Jazzer wants more Tracey; Alice wants more time with Martha and Amy wants more space… Very true. And now we know Kirsty wants more farming expertise in the rewilding project, but not Pip (thank the lord) so does that mean approaching Adam? Currently under-employed.

@LillianGish: I tune in to hear birdsong and bleating in the English countryside not hammy acting and suggestive grunting.

@stilldumdedumming: Archers is good at the dynamics of family, farming, what it means to have your job, your home and your inheritance so closely aligned etc etc not this nonsense!

@DoctorTwo: Like fuck would Pheobe buy her parents a goldfish each. The Ambridge character transplant fairy has been working overtime this past few weeks, it's been absolutely fucking appalling bar a couple of exceptions.

Can't disagree with any of that. I want to hear more about the pigs and any other effects of Brexit. A topical insert about the war in Ukraine must surely be on the way.

Any happy listeners out there? Any disgruntled listeners with even more grumbles? Over to you!

@Roysnewshirt

Poor Roy in his dressing gown.

Do men actually wear dressing gowns nowadays? It all seems to be more about leisure wear as far as I can see…Roy is more likely to have popped over last night in trackie bots and a hoodie.

My husband wears a dressing gown and like @Kimikosnightmare's has no trackie bots and hoodie. He is somewhat older than Roy admittedly.

Maybe Roy could have called the “council” and they could have turned up to confiscate Freddy’s noise making DJ equipment (unlikely but then so is Cathy being a hotel manager and Easter Bunny at 70 when she should have both a teachers’ and state pension and a son who is possibly paying her rent so she could afford to put her feet up).

@Roysnewshirt

I think it’s all in the extras…

The actual arrangement of dinner/sparkling conversation is considered above board and quite easy to arrange through an -apparently respectable - agency.

Anything else is ‘extra’ and often cash in hand.

How do I know this?!?

As if a rich successful woman in her 40s would pay a teenager for dinner dates without sex involved I mean it's gross and predatory to pay a much younger person for sex and company but there is no way she'd only be paying for company!

I am clearly too invested in this
There ei son way that Freddie would get public liability insurance to run a dj business with a. criminal conviction- unless Mummy has very deep pockets

2 things all clients ask for. Public Liability and DBS

I know lots of people with dressing gowns.

Roy is not that young, he has a daughter who is in her 20s.

@Fulmine

I do hope Vince's suggestions for Freddie include packing in the DJing. Freddie's blatant cadging for money for equipment is getting painful to listen to.

His own mother is not short of a bob or two, ask her. And if she doesn't want to fund him, what makes him think her boyfriend would want to?

I do think that having the son of the big house be a useless (ex) druggy waster with no real skills or ambition is extremely realistic. Pretty sure if you fling a stick anywhere in Ibiza you hit the heir to somewhere or other. The only decent thing he does is work at GG. In real life (sorry) at least one of Freddy and Lily would have leveraged the family money to start a "street food" stall or similar by now. Freddy would actually probably enjoy/be good at touring festivals round the country selling Ambridge microbrewery type beer or rare breed burgers (always seems cruel) or whatever.

This is it …

Heart in mouth …

God’s representative on Earth …

You could see that coming a mile away with blinkers on. I reckon Kathy will now retire, Tracey will be hotel manager and Roy will be out. I suppose we'll have to wait a few months though, which is fair enough.

But who is the mysterious new 60% shareholder?

I don't think having a drug conviction is a barrier to becoming a DJ. In some circles it's practically a prerequisite

Tracey for management for sure, but don't really believe Oliver would have given them so little notice unless the payouts are truly hefty.

Bad news for Ian, with Adam having taken a massive pay cut too.

Personality transplant fairy been hard at work with Ruari I see. He was being obnoxious before he got drunk. Nice to Alice being calm and useful.

Feel sorry for Roy receiving that news off the back of no sleep.

@BoreOfWhabylon

But who is the mysterious new 60% shareholder?

Do you think the SWs know?

Between the whole creative team they haven’t gathered enough talent for even a wiggly sketch of a Gill …

Maybe they’ll kill two birds and have them as the new majority shareholders.

What’s the story advantage of Oliver keeping 40%? Is it so we can eventually have an Ambridge scramble for shares? Will they pass to his daughters or grandchildren??

A BOOP for the mention of JAMIE!

Hazel Woolley??

Didn't she hint at something when she was hanging around a few months ago?

Also, Kathy must be going to do something major otherwise what's the point of bringing her back - apart from to mention Ukrainian refugees.

Saw the takeover coming but not a year's closure for GG. Am not sure Oliver would have truly ever allowed that, as Roy outlined.
Big blow for TraynJazz.

Ooh yes Hazel would make sense and be appropriately torturous

Yeah I'm sure Haze said something in her leaving remarks that made me think she hadn't finished with Ambridge yet. And she got v misty eyed when she had lunch at GG didn't she, memories of playing on the lawn etc?

Yup.

Their redundancy- Ian, Kathy, Roy should set them up for a while

I may have to stop listening if it’s Hazel.

Grey Gables must be the only country house hotel in the country that's struggling at the moment.

Yes, I agree it will be Hazel.

I still think she could be thwarted by a consortium of ex-employees pooling their redundancy payouts.

That would explain Kathy's reappearance, @BoreOfWhabylon .....

@JanglyBeads

That would explain Kathy's reappearance, *@BoreOfWhabylon* .....

Think Kathy's reappearance is for the actress's swansong storyline. She could fling her dosh into the pot and return to silence though.

The 🔮 is being extremely enigmatic about the whole thing, but says Hazel will not get her sticky mitts on Grey Gargoyles. Also, Adil's delivery is too arch and stilted for him to join the cast permanently (although, it's a low bar).

I suspect that the new owners will just be Nameless Big Hotel Chain and we may never know precisely who they are.

Can it really make financial sense to close the entire hotel for a year, especially at such short notice? Surely they will have bookings for months ahead, including wedding bookings? Are they really going to be able to get plans drawn up and builders starting work within a couple of weeks? What if they need planning permission?

Can it really make financial sense to close the entire hotel for a year, especially at such short notice?

not sure about the notice, but I assume they need to close completely to be able to make everyone redundant. and to avoid tupe rules.

I thought Adil was the buyer. Who was he then?