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Estate Agent cliches / pet peeves
103

CoronaIsWatching · 28/09/2020 19:19

What really grinds your gears on estate agent property listings?

Mine are;

  • "For sale by the modern method of auction"
  • "The ever popular x"
  • "In need of modernisation"
  • Some generic statement about being close to bars, shops and restaurants

    Every day during my property search I see each of the above, drives me barmy!
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domesticslattern · 28/09/2020 19:20

"Compromising of"

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Jujuball · 28/09/2020 19:26

The cheesy sayings in the advert like "This one won't hang around for long!".

Especially when they do end up hanging around for a long time Grin

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ShellieEllie · 28/09/2020 19:32

Guide Price £200-£210K. What on this planet does that mean? Would an offer below £200K be rejected? or do they want £210k?

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samlovesdilys · 28/09/2020 19:33

It has been renovated to a high standard!!

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Oohmegooliebird · 28/09/2020 19:36

Isn't in need of modernisation a factual statement though? How else should they phrase it. Requires work? Dated?

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mountains76 · 28/09/2020 19:37

Peen & Fadge estate agents are "proud to present to market"

So pompous.

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Pomegranatemolasses · 28/09/2020 19:38

Houses which 'boast', eg this charming property boasts three reception rooms.

'Viewing advised'

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Pomegranatemolasses · 28/09/2020 19:39

Every area is 'highly sought after'

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SomeoneInTheLaaaaaounge · 28/09/2020 19:41

The word “stunning” makes my teeth itch

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Pfeffel · 28/09/2020 19:42

Just seen one that offers a 'coir door mat'. Think they were struggling a bit!

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Parkermumma07 · 28/09/2020 19:43

This property in the cosmopolitan town of ....... made me cringe on a recent listing

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2020isnotbehaving · 28/09/2020 19:46

I’ve been living opposite a building site development which has billboards boasting of “private outdoors gardens” ffs gardens are all outdoors!!

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FastFood · 28/09/2020 19:48

"deceptively spacious"

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KitMarlowesCodpiece · 28/09/2020 19:49

'Benefits from', always followed by something that you'd expect as standard, like walls or indoor plumbing.

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BabetteAteOtemeal · 28/09/2020 19:52

UNNECESSARY capitals to EMPHASISE some total BULLSHIT

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FatimaMunchy · 28/09/2020 20:03

'Executive detached'

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PattyPan · 28/09/2020 20:03

Courtyard style garden/low maintenance garden = a few sad paved square feet

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JoJoSM2 · 28/09/2020 20:07

Just seen one that offers a 'coir door mat'. Think they were struggling a bit!

🤣

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BabetteAteOtemeal · 28/09/2020 20:08

'Unveiled to the market'

'Boasts a spacious master/a light filled living room/GCSE in social studies'

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JoJoSM2 · 28/09/2020 20:13

My favourite... not... is the agent whose listings go along the following lines:

Bedroom 1: double glazed window, panel radiator, ceiling downlight, power point

Bedroom 2: double glazed window, panel radiator, ceiling downlight, power point

Bedroom 3: double glazed window, panel radiator, ceiling downlight, power point

Bathroom: washbasin, low level WC, shower cubicle...

Really makes me want to buy every house they market.

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Oohmegooliebird · 28/09/2020 20:13

@Pomegranatemolasses

Houses which 'boast', eg this charming property boasts three reception rooms.

'Viewing advised'

Yes viewing advised. Isn't that true for all properties? Are there some they don't think it's worth the bother?
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FatimaMunchy · 28/09/2020 20:17

One near us has twee little headings to attract your attention
'Excellence as standard' and 'Elegant Evolution' being two current ones.
One of our local estate agents has an Aspirational Homes range. No idea what that is supposed to mean.

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2bazookas · 28/09/2020 20:17

"Master bedroom", ugh

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Tartyflette · 28/09/2020 20:19

Yeah, 'comprised of' always used to irritate me but it doesn't seem as common these days, I think they've been given a heads-up!
'Proud to present' (this bog-standard 3BR semi....)🤔🤥

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LolaSkoda · 28/09/2020 20:55

OIEO 🙄

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