Sensitive middle class child in rough state primary, can this ever work?

[indiemummy]

What do you think? Going private is not an option for us. DS in local state primary. Teachers & atmosphere lovely, even a swimming pool in school. Oftsted pretty cr*p, 75% don't have English as first language. I thought that with support at home, DS could get the most out of the school. Was totally confident about sending him there...

...However, in reality he's totally left out. The other kids screech and scream all the time, and discuss power rangers, mcdonalds, different tv programmes etc. DS doesn't know what power rangers or mcdonalds ARE, and rarely watches tv. so he just plays on his own at school. He's only in nursery class but we had planned to keep him there as we liked the school and it is our nearest school, 5 mins walk (any other would be 20 mins walk or a bus ride - we don't drive)... Tbh think other schools near us will be similar.

Feel so bad for him - will he make friends eventually? Don't mean to sound like a snob. Not saying we are great parents or anything! More like the opposite! I just want DS to fit in and make friends but not sure if this is possible (or if I want him to change...??) All these 4 yrs of feeding him organic, omega-3, reading with him, he has a whole library of books at home... and now I wish I hadn't bothered so he could fit in and not be left out at school!!

Anyone with any experience of anything like this??? Thank you thank you! Just a bit confused! xxx

On the contrary, I enjoy good-humoured banter as much as the next MNer

I'm not a big fan of malicious namechangers though. Just a personal preference.

How have I been malicious Greeny?

Um... your first two posts on MN insulted two posters. This may be your chosen approach to meeting new friends (if we're pretending you're not a cowardly namechanger), but I think you'll find it'll have limited success around here.

I posted comments re your pomposity and Murphees arse licking.Maybe you should read them again.

I can't see any earthly reason to read them again. They weren't particularly original or interesting the first time.

Now, are you going to be brave and tell me who you are?

But this hijacking Indiemummys thread.Serious issue to be addressed.

And I meant your own posting not mine.

Yes, I wonder that didn't occur to you when you started it

Bye bye then. If you're a genuine new poster , I expect we'll see plenty of one another on other threads.

Aurevoir a bientot.

Gurrier - isn't your name really Chippy?

No it's Scanger.Pretty innit!

I suspect Rhubarb at this point.

GREENY how are you?

Just grand, thank you gurrier

Mhamai also a suspect. But my money's on Rhubarb.

You really have picked up on the Irish ting havent u.

Iam going to stop posting on this thread-it's not fair on Indiemummy.I hope your son settles in his new school,Indie,and good luck.

My DS was a sensitive boy whose friends were girls right up until he started school.

He fitted into school from day one his teachers think he is lovely "so quiet and always does what he is told" but I think you will find once the testosterone kicks in they all become a bit more boisterous!

He's now as drawn to McDonalds as the rest (despite only having been a couple of times and not liking the food). Plays superheroes, Dr Who & football despite never having seen either of the first two and not being particularly inclined towards sports. He has a big group of friends some of whom are outgoing and boisterous and some quieter so he can socialise with different ones depending on what "mood" he is in.

He still loves books, is articulate & affectionate - just because he mixes with a diverse range of "classes" doesnt change who HE is!

Also would like to say some of the housing association children are "well brought up" and some of the middle class Drs/professional parents children are real uncouth bullying shits.

Just feel I have to have my name listed here representing long hair, which my boy will have... once he grows some

I was somewhat like Spidermama at school, although more sporty. I asked my parents if I could go to another school, but no luck... Alienation sucks and if your ds was older and not enjoying himself (which you say he is atm) then monitoring the situation sounds like a good way to make sure he likes school and can talk to you about the good and the bad x

My basic take on it is that you should have confidence in your child's ability to cope. If he can't, then move him, but from what you say it seems like he is having a great time at school. It's rare to form close friendships in nursery-- I think you will see him blossom once he is 5,6,7... My dd's school sounds similar in terms of children whose first language is not english. If anything my dd has an advantage by speaking english better than most which has given her confidence.
Also give it a year and they will all be yabbering away in english. Amazing how quickly they pick it up...

My son is at a rough primary school. I was worried how he was going to cope and the first four weeks were really tough. He has now made friends. He has never had a McDonalds in his life, but loves power rangers.

I think he is a bit envious of the a fact that he does not have a second language. One of his little friends has been trying to teach him hindi.

Frankly I think very short hair is more practical for school boys. Even middle class kids can catch nits. I cant think of anything worse than having to detangle long hair when checking for headlice .. (or even removal)