Concerned about son's year 2 teacher and grouping

[TheBFactor]

Hello everyone
I am new here.
I have a wonderful, witty, energetic, extremely bright boy who is a summer baby, hence one of the youngest in a class of 30. We have been told since Reception that he is "immature" and behind the rest since the day he started Reception. The class teacher was very positive at the beginning of this year and seemed to really "get" my son finally, but more recently they seem to have turned negative again. He does not have Special Needs, but has been persistently grouped (I think for both Literacy and Maths) with a SEN boy and 2 overseas children whose English ability is weak. I am told my son is doing very well in Literacy (although they say he does not appear to focus on his writing - according to the teacher it is becacuse he can't be bothered !).

The class teacher says his attitude makes him extremely "disadvantged" and predicted taht he will be "disadvantage" next year also. She then proceeded to name various children in the class and make direct comparisons with other children, telling me very personal and private issues about other children and their abilities.

I am an educator (higher education level) myself - it is against the confidentiality rules for a teacher to talk about other students in such detail and make direct comparisons. My son ought to be compared to an ideal "age group" not to others in the class. I have been keeping an eye on him this year as I do not wish to destroy his confidence. He is naturally an extrovert, confident little boy, but he has said on numerous occassions that he feels he is bottom of the class and that the other children think so too - a few have called him babyish and I wonder how much of that come's from the teacher's attitude towards him.

Luckily, because of his graet personality, he has close friendships with several other boys and seems to be happy at school, but I am really concerned as the school are very good at having one way dialogues with me, i.e. they talk, but never listen to anything I have to say about him. They seem to think they know more about him than I do and that their reasons for placing him in whatever group is absolutely right. The negative labelling of boys is quiet common at schools I'm afraid. The quiet, shy girls seem to get away with things and the boys don't. I'm trying to get my son out of the labelling scenario.

A boy and a girl have so far been pulled out of the same class. When I spoke to their parents they had similar concerns, the other boy was also one of the youngest. The girl's mother (the girl had a learning disability) said to me in private that her daughter's emotional well-being wasn't being addressed in this class. This rings alarm bells for me.

It's meant to be an Ofsted Grade 1 school, yet I hear things from others that are similar to my views, that they are more concerned about ticking Ofsted boxes than they are about the needs of individual children.

So what now? Do I pull him out and take him to another school which is less Ofsted glorified, or do I write to the Head (usually it's chats that are not written down so I want it written down) and ask for a written reply? Should I ask them to switch my son around as I see no justification why such a bright little boy (even they have admitted he is intelligent) is in the weakest group where he is not being stretched ?

The taecher says my son is NOT naughty - he has also never been accused of being aggressive, hitting or swearing (thank goodness as it woudl be untrue any way). For some strange reason (perhaps because the teachers have decided they doesn't like me for asking questions?) I think my son is very much on the teacher's radar so gets noticed more often for whatever he does (he has been sent outside the classroom on quite a few occassions on the most absurd reasons like switching off the light by mistake or carrying on with something when the teacher had asked him to stop and she had not waited for him to explain that he had not heard her!)
I noticed on a recent class trip that my son was told off more often than other boys, even though others were behaving quite badly by most parents/teachers standards my son was extremely well behaved. I see a lot of unfair treatment going on. He is on the teacher's radar while others seem to be below it and get away with things he can't. Please help.

I am not that silly, they would simply penalise my son if I showed my true feelings.
If you honestly believe this to be true move him ASAP.

My son was a school rated "outstanding" by OFSTED. He was miserable as, like your ds, from year 1 was labelled as "struggling". My ds1 is also a summer baby and simply could not do what some of the other children in his class - who were 10 months older than him in some cases - could do.

His experiences destroyed his self belief and made him very unhappy.

I moved him last year to a school rated "satisfactory" by OFSTED and he is so much happier...the new school are much more child led and dont focus so much on SATS results and what children "should" be doing.

As an educator yourself do you really think OFSETD reports are worth the paper they are written on???????????

He is in the group he is in because that is the professional judgement ot his teacher. It is not in her interests to place him there because, as you seem to think, she doesn't like him.
Your posts come across as being quite aggressive and anti-school. That is possibly why people are picking up on relatively minor issues.
If you have no confidence in the school or its staff, then move your son asap.

RMCW - I am beginning to think that those of you who have had simialr experience are right.

There is a lot of poor quality teaching out there and it never gets picked up by anyone other than the parents.

I just mentioned Ofsted ratings because most of us as first time parents get fooled into thinking that Ofsted 5 stars have some sort of wow factor.

I put my son into the school just before I started teaching myself, so didn't know much about how Ofsted works when he first started school at this "Outstanding" school which is massivley oversubscribed. You would think if others are willing to give an arm and a leg to live in the catchment, it must be the best.

Now I realise I too have been fooled, despite being an educator ; )

No he isn't perfect, but he is my child and I hate to see his childhood knocked out of him just so that some silly teacher can tick the right boxes.

He is so incredibly popular with the other children, sociable and happy, I must be doing something right.

I think a lot of adults are hypocrites. What we value in adults, independence, imagination, being extrovert, etc. are seen as a pain in the butt in a child.

I didn't come here to prove to people my son is intelligent. His school reports use the word "intelligent" as do the teacher and the Head in face to face meetings. It's not hard to spot a bright child.

So despite the grouping thing, they can't deny the fact. He has been put there for other reasons, which I now realise are the wrong reasons.

No extremely bright children CAN leave school and learn nothing. This happens when motivation is driven out of them. It's due to the lack of stimulation and bad teaching at school. I come across very bright adults who have been failed by their educational backgrounds.

I know he will be fine long term. He will make good friends the minute he goes to a new school, he is that sort of boy ; )

No- I am not anti-school - just "anti-BAD school" : )

I am not aggressive, just very very upset that I have wasted so much time and energy on this school with very little pay off for my son.

Bfactor

My son, who is a sweet, kind and loving boy ended up showing signs of clinical depression due to his experiences at school.

He was told/shown/made aware from the start of year 1 that he wasnt "good enough".

Some of the other children called him "slow" and told him he was on the "thick table". He was bullied by same boy for 3 years, despite my complaints.

I should have taken him out long before I did tbh, but, like you said, I thought that a school with an "outstanding" OFSTED report was the right place for him.

What a fool I was

Some teachers are great - his reception and year 2 teacher were - but some (like his year 1 teacher) should be ashamed to call themselves teachers. I knew that his year 1 teacher was useless when ds1's report came home with spelling and grammatical errors.....this was the man telling me ds1 wasnt good enough!!!!!!!!!!!

Go with your instinct.

I worries about moving ds1 but its been great so far....his new teacher says its like he as always been in the class he has fitted in so well

He is happy, learning at his own pace and is starting to beleive in his abiltiies again.

Good luck x

I think a lot of adults are hypocrites. What we value in adults, independence,imagination, being extrovert, etc. are seen as a pain in the butt in a child.
and I expect a lot of parents to be shouting the loudly if their independent, extrovert managed to injure him/herself when demonstrating their energetic, imagination in the classroom and the teacher failed to "control" the situation.
Yes extremely bright children can leave school having learnt nothing especially if they don't listen.

I think you need to look at this from a long term prospective. What are the rest of the teachers in the school like? Do you know many Yr 6 Mums that you trust - I knew lots and I was left in no doubt that things did not get much better further up the school.

It's not so unusual to have at least one poor teacher at a school, parents will usually know - despite schools thinking parents are clueless - your son will hopefully be resilient enough to cope and put it behind him but if you think the teacher's approach is common throughout the school then you need to seriously consider moving him.

I'm new here, but is advertising like this allowed?

No

TheBfactor, from what you say the teacher doesn't sound very nice at all. Still, he's in Yr2 now, so has he really had three lousy teachers, who all think the same of him? That would surprise me a teeny bit. I'd bet lots of us have had a teacher for a year, who we weren't too keen on, but three in a row?? If they really were all useless, then I'd at least start to look at the other local schools.

Kirsty has resurrected a few tutoring threads today-have reported her.
Pity she can't spell.

About 30 so far deaddei!

Bloody woman.
For some reason she is annoying me.

and me!

RMCW - so sorry to hear that about your boy. I'm glad it has worked out for you. Let's hope it works out for my ds before he notices what is going on around him.

Yes, having been here 2.5 years I have come to the conclusion that the teachers and Head stick together and that it's very much an "us and them" mentality between parents and teachers.

Sorry mrz - how on earth did you get from energetic, imaginative, extrovert (and very artistic) to aggressive bully presumably walking around with some sort of harmmer and injuring everyone? I said in my earlier posts that he has never ever either injured himself or another child. He isn't aggressive. Even the teacher has admitted he isn't naughty or aggressive.

Alarm bells were ringing in Reception, I should have done something about it then, I just lived in the hope we would find better teachers further up the years. Nothing has changed.

mrz - children often don't listen when they are bored and not properly stimulated to do interesting AGE RELEVANT things. It comes down to poor teaching + poor class management skills.

In my son's case it is probably all of these things (having seen the teacher in action myself) plus he is blatantly in the wrong group.

She talks to these poor kids as though they are 18, not 6 - 7.

There is some very poor teaching in schools I am afraid.

Added to that the onset of the NC which tries to teach a much too far wide ranging curriculum to very young children.

In other european countries they dont start to "teach" formally til 6/7. They have the highest literacy rates and lowest incidences of SEN in the world. Not a coincidence.

At age 3-7 children should learn through play and concentrate on their social and emotional intelligence.

If a child is very very bright then there are G&T programmes.

I was also a parent helper in my sons old school and was not happy by a lot of things I saw....children who needed help being ignored, children being bullied, teachers writing on white boards and spelling words incorrectly, not being able to manage such large classes....it goes on and on.....

Teachers think parents are clueless. They think they know our children better than us. The HT of the local junior school told me (very pompously) that she would have "sussed out" ds1 within a week.

The HT at his new school told me that they would have a good idea of his abilties after 6 months, which I think is a much more resonable length of time to get to know a child and their abiltiies.

I can only say that I wish I had taken him out earlier....I bitterly regret I didnt.

TheBFactor children don't listen for lots of reasons and not listening is the reason many of them fail to learn so find themselves grouped with other children who are "disadvantaged" ...

RMCW 6 months is two thirds of a school year! in which time a child with difficulties could have fallen behind and a bright child could have coasted ... 6 weeks (half a term) is much more realist - time for the child to settle and get to know the teacher and the teacher time to get to know the child.

TheBFactor

I think you should move your son to another school, though you asked earlier what guarantee was there that things would be different. There is no guarantee of course.

I would move him now to a school with more focus on pastoral care and less focus on impressing those delightful OFSTED inspectors.

But you do need to tell him what is expected of him in class - listen to the teacher, do what you are told to do when you are told to do it, obey the school rules. This has to be made plain to him.

In my experience, some schools will deliberately try to "weed out" children with SEN, behavioural difficulties, or just ones who aren't as addvanced as others, simply to tick those OFSTED boxes for exam results and classroom behaviour.

Move him - but I think you then have to take a step back, once you have made the rules clear to him.

Good luck.

mrsz all I can tell you is that whatever the HT is doing it is working....my son may not be where he "should" be wrt the literacy NC but he is;
happy to go to school
happy whilst he is there
not being bullied
not being made to feel he is "stupid"
encouraged to take part in plays, shows etc
and will now pick up a book and read it without tears and tantrums.

As far as I am concerned that is a success story.

RMCW and every single one of those outcomes would still apply in addition to the staff knowing your son 4 and half months earlier so that his learning needs can be met too.

I am not sure what you mean mrsa, sorry

The HT in question was explaining that she felt that within 6 months ds1 would be happy and confident in his new school and that all the staff would know him and his needs....in fact he settled in pretty much immediately.

The other HT seemed to think this could be achieved in a week and was very pompous in that assumption.

Bear in mind we are talking about a child who was showing signs of clinical depression due to his experiences at school.....I think he needs to be somewhere where he can just be himself and not get scared he will be punished for not being "good enough".

His old school was results/SATS driven so kids like my ds1 who didnt do what they were "supposed" to were treated appallingly.
One mother I know fought for 3 years for them to assess her child....they told her was "lazy", "naughty" and one teacher told her he was "the worst child in reception"

Due to her persistance and the fact she knows her child better than the bloody teachers he was diagnosed last year with DAMP (which as you must know is a very complex set of SN)

The Ed Psych asked the HT, and SENCO (my ds1's dire year 1 teacher by conicidence) why they were giving * words like "tomorrow!" to spell when he couldnt spell "am" and they just gaped at her.

Some teachers and schools are just rubbish mrsa and cannot deal wqith children who do not tick their little boxes.