Abortion but planning TTC in next 6 months

[Lifelyk]

Apologies but posting her for traffic as pregnancy choices is really quiet.
I am thinking of abortion with my current early pregnancy at 5 weeks but ttc again in 6 months.
I have a 2 yo DC and I want to finish my studies due Dec 2024 and plan a baby for Jan/Feb 2025. I am so unsure at this point on what to do if I couldn't conceive then as I am 34 and will be 35 then.
Any suggestions are appreciated.

I completely agree and would never consider doing so for the reasons that you've given (and I say that as someone who finished law school in the US with a toddler.)

You'd be absolutely insane to do this. What if you can't get pregnant again? I was on a 2 year post grad course, had 1st baby Sept so year off, 2nd March 18 months later so just finished off the course while on maternity.

I had an abortion at 17, then struggled to conceive in my 20s.
Then had a baby at 30 which I felt was a miracle, however I then got pregnant a year after with contraception.
Then I had a loss, then got pregnant at 36 quite unexpectedly.

As pro choice as I am and I am 100%, I have struggled with guilt and I was convinced my not conceiving was a "punishment", older and wiser and understand that isn't true, but still, very very hard to not beat yourself up.

I admire the women on here who share their experience and they were able to see it for what it is, a medical procedure and nothing to carry guilt and shame about, nothing at all.
I maybe now at my age not struggle as I did in my younger days, however I do think it's important to consider your feelings afterwards because you don't want that interference with your studies or family, you having a mental health episode, which unless you're very sure of your choice, it may create.

Fertility is never a given but I'd seek reassurance from your GP about the TTC after the termination. It may put your mind and ease and give you a sense of what's best for you.

I'm glad your DH is supportive and best of luck OP, the choice has to be what's best for you, just always remember that!

I'd have the baby, I'm pro choice but I think your second pregnancy would be overshadowed by the abortion if you conceived after six months. You'd always be thinking of what the other baby would have been like.

I'd work my arse off to get through the studies and have the baby, if possible.

I am fully pro choice but this seems crazy to me. How would you feel if you had issues conceiving next time around? If you want another child I would just make this work. Abortions are traumatic and you won’t know how it will affect you. It just seems really clinical.

It's a permanent choice for what is a temporary situation. There's no way I would do it if I were you (and I've had a TOP).

I never thought I will get in this sort of situation. I have been thinking long and hard since the day I have found out. This isn't easy for me and appreciate all the responses here.

Jesus christ

This makes no sense. Abort a healthy foetus and then hope to get pregnant just 6 months later. You aren't that young. I wouldn't think it was a great idea if you were 10 years younger but it's a real risk at 34 that it won't happen for you again.

I've had lots of friends struggle with secondary infertility in their 30s. It really got them down.

Abortion isn't contraception. I'd just make it work with your studies. Sorry if thus sounds harsh.

I feel the same. I’m relieved not to be alone.

I was in a situation like this. I made my decision becaude i knew there was no way I'd ever regret having the baby but a real possibility of regretting it if I didn't.

How did you get pregnant? Failed contraception or just not using anything? (Have a feeling you’re going to say it’s the former either way.) If you want to have another baby in 6 months, I think it would be quite cold to abort this one for the sake of 24 weeks in time. I’m all for pro choice but this just seems a step too far for me.

I wouldn’t be having an abortion for a course, personally. If you want a baby keep this pregnancy and work the course around it.

It’s your body and your choice, but personally I wouldn’t risk something like this for the sake of a few months.
It would be different if you didn’t want more kids, or if you didn’t want another for a few years yet, but to have an abortion for the sake of a few months wouldn’t be worth the risk.

There’s only a few months left of your studies and you’d only be around 4 months pregnant, is there no way you could keep the baby and carry on? If not, I’d think about it in terms of your studies can always be picked up later, fertility is never guaranteed.

You're all for pro choice as long as it's for reasons you approve of.

I'd keep the baby, you can pick up your studies later. You can't guarantee a pregnancy/baby later

I also agree with the people saying it sounds clinical. I’m pro choice, but this situation seems different when you’re saying you do want another baby in the very near future.

Abortion is a distressing medical procedure, why would you put yourself through it for 5 months?

I agree with this.

My best mate had an abortion and never managed to get pregnant again, even with IVF.

I'm not sure that's typical though.

assuming you have a partner, would it therefore be possible to study during maternity leave? Carry on the course but obviously have time off work?

my friend got pregnant in her final year of a night degree alongside work. She went into labour in a class and went back to class two weeks later.

You could end up having an abortion and being so miserable and devastated by it that you risk failing your studies anyway. Life is way to unpredictable and uncertain to end a pregnancy then try and start another one in 6 months.

Your body and emotions won’t fit into your timetable the way you are expecting them to.

I had a similar dilemma and went through with a termination and it then took me a while to conceive (even though the prior pregnancy happened after one night) but I don’t regret it as it wasn’t the right time for our family. However the period was longer than 5 months between wanting to try again.

I had one when I was much younger; started trying for a baby 5 years later and it took 2 and a half years conceive

Sorry to jump on your thread OP, but we are going to move this to 'pregnancy choices' as it's a bit too sensitive a topic for Chat.