Fabulous 40+ and Proud: Mum and Mums to be Part 2

[Kaz1967]

Ok we have talked to the end of the topic so here is a new one

Oh here you all are! Starting a new thread is a great idea, I just didn't have time to read all the other posts and missed out on so much, hope I can keep up this time.

Johnworf, I'm so glad to hear about Katherine's progress, she sounds like such a little fighter I imagine her as a sort of baby ninja!

Baby Wahwah seems to have developed baby acne, so is not looking terrribly attractive, bless her, but in all other respects seems fine. Anyway, must dash, DS has just thrown a spoon at me as a gentle hint...

Yes, Banana Republic in Regent St. No chance of me going there in the forseeable. My excitement is a possible trip to Top Shop Maternity Dept in Oxford St. I got a few nice bits there last time, though was working in town then so a) closer and b) had ready income which DH did not quiz me over (credit crunch, soaring petrol/food costs etc apparently it's beans on toast for us from now on ). However I don't think anyone's going to get me into a pair of skinny jeans, even with a stretch waistband. I'm skinny only from the ankle down and then probably not for much longer - like you say mrsboogie with the old ankle thing

Don't know - had one of those days today when I can't do anything and just had a fit of the utter tireds. Feeble and 40 today.

JW thanks for the link it is the site I am already looking at but you have shown me a section that I have not seen before.

I have visited my local mothercare and sat in the display chair rocking with my feet up and it is fantastically comfortable but it is the expensive version. I need to try out the cheaper ones but it looks like I will have to buy it and see.

Just popping in to say hello, hello hello....you can run but you can't hide ;-)
So happy to hear Katherine is doing so well Johnworf - wonderful to hear.

Hello everyone. Just got back from some acupuncture, a positive step towards my body realigning itself. But got an unexpected lecture from the acupuncturist about seeking fertility treatment quickly. Apparently most clinics have a cut off age of 45 (I'm 44). The thing is I'm not really into IVF, and I don't want to go to a clinic for donor eggs, but people keep recommending it. I conceived naturally within five months. Yikes, what to do?!

After he went through all the details of my monthly cycle, as in period, he said that I had a very healthy cycle and should have no trouble conceiving. It's so confusing. Positive one moment, damning the next

If I do conceive again was considering lying about my age so people will leave me alone at the hospital. Its not like they check your passport or anything is it? I could say I'm 39, after all I don't look too bad(with my clothes on)

rosebury LOL I was just in the right place at the right time.

brookeslay congratulations and welcome

Hi babycakes didn't see you there. Was just thinking about you the other morning. How's it all going?

babycakes26 and msdynamo it is lovely to see you both.

msdynamo really hoping things go well with concieving again this time.

rosebury I have a cheap rocking chair I have had for years put the covers from a outside sun chair inside it and a old duvet too and when my asthma was really bad after I had glandular fever I slept in it with my feet up on the bed.

msdynamo.. lovely to know you're here still. When I was 37 or 38 I went to see a gyno as I had an ovary pain and I had an ultrasound etc and they couldn't find anything wrong. Anyway this gyno man (private - cost the earth) all he kept saying was I should stop worrying about pains and other such nonsense and start concentrating on trying for a baby as I had left it so late there was virtually no time left. I came out of the consulting room in such a panic about how I was never going to have a child and my only hope was IVF. Then when DH and I started trying for DS, which I had when just 39, it took only 6 weeks for me to get preggers! Don't listen to them. Try to conceive naturally and if it doesn't work, then worry about. You will find a clinic somewhere I'm sure.

Nice to see you back too babycakes26

does anyone know whether its ok to use Deep Heat in pregnancy? My shoulder is killing me - something to do with the way I am sitting at my computer at work. I imagine its like everything else of a pharmaceutical nature - avoid!!!

Could do with one of those sticky patches tho...

Yes...I was wondering about you babycakes26 Good to see you popping by. And HELLO wahwah and baby wahwah...poor thing, baby acne...bless.

Is mrsjupiter about these days over in the Far East? Do drop by to say Hello and let us know how you are

So interesting hearing your stories of how the medical profession have treated you because you're older. I was expecting so much flack because of it yet all the drs and midwives I've come across in the last 18 mnths and 2 DC later have never mentioned age being a problem. If anything they've poo pooed it saying problems in pregnancy/birth are common and mainly not age related at all. I guess I've been very lucky to have that kind of support.

Talking of older mothers I see Ulrika Johnson is old enough to join our thread...and she gave birth a few days after me at our local hospital. Seems High Wycombe is THE place to be for the older bird

msdynamo I second pwcbird....go for it naturally - enjoy and then see what happens. Have a contingency plan just in case - but give it a shot the fun way first. I was told I was heading for early menopause...and I'd had blood test which apparently proved it ...2 DC @41 and 42 seems to prove that wrong !

mrsboogie have you tried heat (as in hot water bottle) or ice back not sure about deep heat. Paracetamol is ok to take.

I use the heat patched for my back they say not to in pregnancy on them (well just about everything does) but was assured on back is fine.

Hello!!

On the subject of age and pregancny, I expected to have lots of tests and monitoring, given my "advanced maternal age" whisper it (44) but I have only seen my midwife once at my booking in appointment and I am now 20 weeks!

I have made appointments at my GP for blood pressure and urine checks, on my own initiative.

BTW do they routinely carry out a GTT test on over 40's or do I need to ask for one?

Lovely to see everyone chatting away!

Minniethemoocher age is not a reason to have GTT the reasons are:
Sugar in urine
family history of diabetes
excessive fluid round baby
polycystic ovaries
large baby
and now a BMI over 30

It is normally done at about 28 weeks if you have none of those you will not be offered it.

ta kaz1967 - I do keep meaning to ask what painkillers are ok - will stay away from the deepheat just in case.

Just been having a look at my pg notes. Am very miffed to see that on the entry for my 20 week scan the sonographer has put "technically difficult scan" which is no doubt a euphemism for "too fat to scan properly". She never said anything to me at the time and when I have had private scans there has been no talk of technical difficulty. If she felt the scan was inadequate surely they should have told me? And I am not that fat - I am tall so my excess poundage is well spread out. The probably get fatter than me through the door every day of the week.

tsk.

Have just got into the posting-on-mumsnet thing and have become hooked far too quickly! How nice to find something for us "geriatrics" - am soon to be 41 and have one DS age 6 1/2 months. Hoping to have another one soon but there are a few oganisational issues (such as emigrating to Australia some time in 2009 - DH is Australian), plus my poor aged bod still needs some time to recover!

Mrsboogie - if you can afford it, have a deep tissue massage on your shoulder. Half an hour should do. Find a reputable massage therapist who advertises that they do pregnancy massage as well as they are trained in the arts of what is acceptable in pregnancy.

The only OTC painkillers recommended for use in pregnancy are paracetamol-based.

And your sonographer might put that on everyone's scan that she does - she might be crap at it!!

i had to go to doc 2 weeks ago about severe pain in leg
he gave me ibro -gel similar to deep heat to use he said was fine
i have also used co-codamol 30/500 for the entire pregnancy as i have fibromalgyia

even though i had to give up the rest of my prescribed meds

Tad ambitious methinks jeanjeannie esp the lose 3 stone before the weekend idea.

I actually miss being pregnant now that Katherine isn't squatting in my tum Not enough to want another baby in there though so purlease, no suggestions!

MW was telling me yesterday about one of her clients that had to go and get the morning after pill 6 days (yes, DAYS) post delivery. I didn't know whether to be impressed or disgusted. I'm still not there and shan't be for a while.

Katherine has a gunky eye today. Typical! First time she opens them they get sticky Anyway, I think I've earned the title of 'Pain the the Arse Mother' on the neonatal unit. Ah well, I'll get over it. It's just me being picky when the nurses are stood around having a chat and I go and break it up because - and I know it's inconvenient - my baby's alarms are ringing out like Big Ben. Yep, I'm a pest and proud.

Hope all you pregnant ladies are having a good days today with your bumps

mrsboogie the recommendation is chemical wise nothing more than paracetamol BUT sometimes you are prescribed stronger opiate based several times. Opiate based cross the placenta and can effect the baby either by causing them to withdraw if you have been taking them routinely or just before it is born making the baby sleepy and causing problems feeding.

Post delivery stock up on paracetamol for your sore bum, and take as often as you can/need it will help with sitting and feeding esp breastfeeding. You will be asked in hospital if you need them get your partner to ask you 4-6 hourly at home (no more than 8 tabs in 24 hrs) so you do not forget don't try to be a Marta it's just not worth it. You can also take ibuprofen if you get mastitis (obviously not if there is a medical reason you cannot take it) for a couple of days it can be really helpful.

Heat is fine but they recommend not putting it over bump as baby has no temperature control and do not like getting too hot. I also still use my TENNs (not a delivery one they have bigger pads and a boost button for contractions) it says not to use in pregnancy but been told it is safe the concern is covering up a pre term labour. Massage is another no chemical one which can help. Deep heat is probably ok I just don't know, personally I am still over sensitive to smell (poor cat is on a dry food diet his wet stuff he has a treat makes me want to puke )

I also have comments on all my scans about difficult due to a raised BMI (accept my 12 week scan for some reason I have lost fat since then I am still wearing the same sized clothes for god sake and my trousers are non maternity AND go over my bump ) it hardly makes you feel any better does it what she did not say on the second one is the little monster was hiding behind a large fibroid not't thing it would matter how flippin thin I was trying to scan through that

johnworf sticky eyes are fairly normal does not necessarily mean anything it's just her getting used to blinking and producing enough fluid to lubricate things, it is unlikely to be an infection.

Oh and don't talk about alarms I hated them being ignored I found it just soooo stressful with them going off. You do get used to the sounds of what is just a I've lost contact noise and an urgent must be dealt with now but still I wish people would think of the poor babies little ears and the fact they were trying to sleep There were times I was in a room with hands in an incubator doing something when another babies went off. I used to turn them all round if I was on my own and someone was on a break so I could see them all with little or no movement and I would talk to the babies and tell them to be patient I was just feeding x or y and would be there in just a minute, or tell them off and ask them to take a big breath sometimes they forget as I am sure you know by now but often it is better to wait a few seconds (sure it feels like a life time to parents) before you give them a little reminder of what to do. Main reason I did it was so parents knew I was aware of what was going off and even if I could not deal with it because it was non urgent I had acknowledged it.

Today I am mostly going to stay at home keep my feet up and try very hard I need to pee in a bottle today I am so scared I will forget and bugger the whole test up.

kaz1967 I know that not every alarm that goes off is an emergency. We've got used to the 'bingy bongy' and the 'whoop whoop-help-me-I'm-not-breathing' ones. Katherine nose dives a lot into desats because of her PDA, especially when she's been moved and knocks her secretions about. We're used to this one now. However sometimes she doesn't come back up on her own and needs help and they're simply not around.

The nurse that was on y'day had both her breaks when I was there - lunch and evening - might just be coincidence but she wasn't around at all when I wanted to ask her questions. Sighs. I AM just a pain in the backside I think

I am just trying not to think what happens (or doesn't) when I'm not there

johnworf I do understand I just could not leave the room with no one in it we did do it on nights occasionally but because it was quieter and there were less people about you could hear every bong, I did notice though I was always one of if not the first to get up when a monitor pinged often to just stand at the bottom of a incubator and give the baby a good talking to (some of the Mums laughed but all said the loved the way I talked to the babies all the time as if they were real people ) I just found the pings annoying and had to switch the noise off and wondered how much more so they were for babies who could not get away from them.

Some nurses are not very good with parents I never minded about negotiating care or listening and answering questions it was for me part of my job and as important (in a different way) as caring for the babies for me.

johnworf I must have come out in sympathy for katherine...I too have a sticky eye...and HUGE white spot (just waiting to be picked) right on the inside of the eyelid. DP is insisting I let him pop it with one of his woodworking tools

Oh it's natural to be a pain in the ar*e in SCBU....you just assume that everyone will be giving the level of care and time you'd give. And if they so much as sit down and have a Kit Kat then Woooo....red rag to a bull!!!

Verity was awake from 4.30am till about 10 mins ago.....WHAH! And feeding constantly. Mmmmmmm, really will have to investigate slings.....Hate the idea of them, but when DP goes off to work I just can't see any option.

Anyone tried a pouch sling? Just that they look the easiest to get on and off and to feed with. I'll lose my temper with anything that takes a lot of tying. Oh lordy, they're all a bit 'knit your own uterus' for my liking If a nice trendy store started selling them or Stella MacCartney made them hip I might be interested.....shallow, I know

Msdynamo and babycakes good to hear from you both. My ds was born when I was 41 and I conceived this one aged 46 I am 24wks and healthy so it is possible to conceive naturally so good luck.

Kaz you made me laugh with your story of the rocking chair, I have gone ahead and ordered a chair cheaper price I am so looking forward to relaxing in it.

have a good day everyong.

hmmmmm the picture I have in my mind jeanjeannie of your eye is positively making me heave

kaz1967 I know that not all nurses are good with parents, especially the 'hands on hips staring at you intently whilst tapping your foot' type of mother is in front of them (that's me btw). Mebbe I'm not good with nurses? I'm fine with the older ones but they really are old school but the younger ones are far too flaky for my liking. I have felt on numerous occasions like shouting at them 'call THAT washing your hands? Go back and do them properly!'

DH doesn't approve of me doing this Thinks I'm just troublemaking. But even he has joined in on occasion.

I'm off to take DS #1 to see Katherine this morning. He's the last one of my children to see her - managed to fit her in after g/f, PS3, uni work and his job. LOL

Not tried a pouch but we have got a slingy type Baby Bjorn thingy for when Katherine grows into it. DH wants to wear it and I won't fight him for it......