Due December 2024 - thread 2

[CatCaretaker]

Follow on from the first thread here:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/5032929-due-december-2024?page=40

Thanks @Lunamoon23 I am so glad your husband can stay with you, it sounds like the experience will be really challenging for you but like you say I'm glad everyone involved in your care will be aware and support you accordingly. Well done you for advocating for yourself. You know best what is right for you and I'm so pleased you had a positive experience with the perinatal mental health team.

Re your other question- that sounds so lovely! I would hate to miss that too. You're looking at just 2 weeks post-partum so go easy on yourself but if I were you I'd get the tx and make a decision closer to the time (can you give the tickets away if you decide not to go?) make sure you listen to your body and if you're not feeling it closer to the time or even on the day don't go. Or maybe plan to just go for an hour or so. I looked back on pics 2 weeks post partum from my first baby and there are pics of me out walking in a country park with my mum and baby in a sling and holding the dog on the lead so 🤷‍♀️ it's impossible to tell right now how you'll be, but if your friends and family are understanding and happy to go at your pace then if it were me I'd look forward to it now, and play it by ear.

@HelterSkelter224 thank you. Same goes to you! For reaching out for the support. So many don't and just struggle along.. it's brave.

And thankfully there are still loads of tickets left, and I think I'd even be okay to book it the week of.. so I think that's what I'll do. I'll be a week post csection at that point and will probably have a better gauge as to whether I think it's something I'd be able to do or not. It's more the fact I'll be getting all the family to buy tickets and they'll be 7 of us, some elderly and they probably wouldn't go without us (as it's kind of our thing and we've asked them) so I'll play it safe and wait until closer to the time. Xxx

Does anyone feel like their baby's movements have changed around 33-35 weeks? My girl has always been very active, but where it used to feel like sudden kicks and jabs, it now feels like slower dragging motions and pushes. The only thing that worries me about it is that they're 'gentler' movements, i.e. they don't take my breath away anymore and I struggle to find a time where she's being active enough for my partner to feel her (whereas this used to happen frequently). I've noticed this for a week.

I'm just not sure whether to call the triage about this (I've already been monitored for reduced movement twice earlier in pregnancy and there was no problem either time) or whether this is something other people have noticed. I also had a growth scan last Tuesday and everything was fine, but I hadn't mentioned reduced movements as at that time I hadn't really noticed it myself. They did say she'd turned head down and had dropped into my pelvis (the reason for my reduced fundal measurement which triggered the growth scan) so at the moment I suspect the change I've noticed is because she's in a different position.

I hate having to track changes to movements, I'm constantly questioning everything!

Forgot to mention my placenta is anterior on the right side of my stomach so if she has positioned her legs towards the right I'd have no chance of feeling them.

@GammaTheGecko my movements have certainly changed, but I do still feel him very often. Probably more so now than before. Whereas before it used to mostly be during the evenings I'd feel him, now I feel him all day-night. But they're less like kicks now but more like big movements (they can sometimes hurt) I also see my tummy change shape depending where he is. Plus my baby is breech, at least he was up until my 32 week scan, I have another on Monday so will see then. But most movements are always felt lower abdomen rather than rib area.

I'd say if you're concerned, call triage. They'd be happy to put your mind at ease and they'd always rather see you than not if you're worried. ❤️ but the fact your still feeling baby is a good thing. But if it's unusual for you you'll know best. Xxxx

@GammaTheGecko it is so stressful constantly thinking about their movements isn't it?

I'm only 33 weeks today so can't really help unfortunately. I'd say call them / go in, not because I think there's something wrong, but because I've been there and the not knowing for sure is horrible. It's worth going to put your mind at ease.

@Lunamoon23 @CatCaretaker Thank you both! I work at the hospital and will be there on Thursday anyway, so I may as well go while I'm there! It really does stress me out a lot though, I wish I could just enjoy the pregnancy and face the physical/emotional challenges without also having to be really attentive to the movements and constantly question whether something is out of her usual pattern (which isn't very regular to be perfectly honest!). Thanks again <3

On a different note, I was wondering if anyone knows whether it's safe to put a baby in a carseat with a cardigan on, or would the same rule as coats and pramsuits apply to cardigans? Just packing hospital bag this week and not sure whether to include some cardigans!

@GammaTheGecko that dragging, slower movement is the same for me, I can now definitely feel like it's a little human in there with wee bony shoulders and elbows and knees. 😫😂 I've an anterior placenta too

But if you're really worried don't wait until your shift on Thursday to go in.

A cardigan should be fine for the car seat, it's more bulky / padded winter coats that shouldn't be worn in a car seat x

@HelterSkelter224 thanks for the tip. I've been told that too about bulky coats and pramsuits, but why is it that they can't be worn in car seats?

@CatCaretaker if you put a bulky coat/pramsuit on in the car seat, the straps wouldn’t be tight enough to keep the baby secure if you were in an accident. I’ve seen videos where they’ve put a baby in with a coat on, then removed the coat and there’s a gap between the straps and the baby of several cm.

Hopefully that makes sense as I’m very much baby brained today (if I can blame that!)

I believe it's because they loosen the tightness of the straps. So in the event of a car accident baby can be ejected easier. But I could be completely wrong 😂 Xxxxx

@GammaTheGecko

Definitely go in for a reassurance scan. Not because I think anything is wrong (I don't), but because you're sat worrying and thats horrid for you!

As a side, I have some very exciting news, after 3 late losses and a lot of unknowns, I have finally been discharged from consultant led care and am now officially under midwife led care! Yay!
They were lovely and said if I wanted to swap back for my anxiety I could, so I know the door is always open which I am very grateful for!
But discussing a birth plan was so exciting. Never thought we would get here.

The consultant said "you have to send us a picture when you have your baby, it's what keeps us going".
So I can't wait to do that!

Not long now everyone. We are nearly there!

@HelterSkelter224
Hope you have had an early night tonight. Two hours is a long time to spend talking about mental health.
I hope you feel supported now, and I hope they have made you feel heard xxx

@LilyJessie that's amazing news!! So happy for you... ❤️❤️ not long at all left now! Xxxxx

Something odd to add tonight ... some of you may remember a couple weeks ago I mentioned how I weighed myself and the scale told me 13.5st which absolutely floored me. (From 9st at first appt) I've just weighed myself again, same scales, same floor. And oddly I'm now down to 12st?? Feels strange as if anything my bumps got bigger.

Yes but I’m not sure that’s exactly what the unit was called.
it has helped me to no end.
I didn’t think I would ever have more children nor be able to!
the work they’ve done with me in this pregnancy has been invaluable i feel so positive about giving birth again.. never thought I would.

@Twinkletwinklelil that's wonderful to hear xx

@Lunamoon23 yes my weight is all over the place, regularly going down or staying the same after a big baby growth spurt (and I'm eating a lot!).

Very strange isn't it 😂

I was very much expecting to stand on them and it have gone up again! Oddly I don't really look like I've gained the 3 stone to look at me, bar the big bump. Although I do feel bigger everywhere. But I was shocked to see it have dropped 1.5st when I've definitely grown more and eaten just as much. I'm not complaining though. Let's hope it stays off over the next 4 weeks, less to loose the other side I guess! Haha.

Morning everyone

Needing a bit of a rant today to get things off my chest...

I'm so, so over being pregnant - and I feel so bad saying it. It's my rainbow baby after I lost my daughter at nearly 17 weeks pregnant so I feel terrible to not be basking in this pregnancy. It was a rough start with all the extra hormones I had to take to support baby and I was so, so sick for months. I don't think I felt OK until about 5.5/6 months. I then got a small break and really enjoyed having my bump back. I'm now 7.5/8 months and done in again. My ridiculous, nausea inducing, indigestion is slowly making a comeback meaning I'm chewing on tums before eating anything so everything tastes pretty much the same and I can't drink my craving juice apple juice without heartburn flare up. PGP/SPD is really starting to bug me as it's now from the moment I get out of bed instead of just at night. Talking of nights I've been nagging insomnia and a stupid sleep pattern all pregnancy but it was manageable, I slept well once I got to sleep but now I'm up 3 or 4 times a night for the bathroom and I just can't get back to sleep if it happens to be after 3am. Today I've been awake from 3:30. Then roll on day time and I just want to nap all day (what's that all about after my body fights it all night!?) Also been getting random bouts of calf muscle cramp at night which I vaguely remember this from previously pregnancies but last night, while I was lying trying to get back to sleep, it attacked so bad I jumped out of bed and so wanted to stretch it out but physically couldn't it was so bad. It's left me with a over worked muscle ache on top of the sore ankle I had on that side from simply pulling my ligaments when walking in trainers that didn't have the best support. So I'm sat with ice packs on my calf and wrapped round my ankle.

Ive also had SO many braxton hicks, painful ones as well, for the past week or so. Lots of bum pressure and cramps. So I'm really uncomfortable most of the time. Nothing seems to help them. I get them when I rest or move, in fact walking is my biggest trigger.

I'm staying hydrated, trying to eat well, rest and exercise moderately. My iron levels have been fine, and I've no UTI etc. I think my body is just older this time and not managing so well as I also have other kids to run after.

I've got my DCs off school and nursery today with chest and ear infections plus a cold. While they are being so good and when on their painkillers and antibiotics are recovering well enough to entertain themselves I can't help but feel annoyed they are home and I can't nap. (and I feel HORRIBLE about that feeling, they have been so ill)

This is very likely my last pregnancy (wasn't planned either, but was so very wanted once discovered) and I so want to be enjoying every minute as I know as soon as its over I'll miss my bump, feeling baby move (which is another thing driving me crazy at night) and just the feeling of having baby so close. I also feel so conflicted about being so grateful yet finding it so hard as well especially as my other pregnancies, from what I remember, where quite enjoyable compared to this one (did have SPD in the first and terrible fatigue in the 2nd) I just feel this one has hit me with everything, and forcefully too. I feel a bit robbed of a nice experience - the first few months were wrecked with anxiety and then hormonal sickness and fatigue, then I got the smallest break before my body just seems to have given up and slowed me down. I haven't even been able to do the usual baby prep that I would usually enjoy, like shopping and nesting, as I already have everything baby needs and don't have the energy and/or space for nesting (baby is literally slotting right into my 2nd child's spot in terms of bigger items - cot, carseat etc is already out)

I'm sorry, I just needed to get all this off my chest. Probably just tipped over the edge after a rubbish night's sleep and a sore leg on top of the usual 3rd trimester joys. I just want to enjoy this time.

@OnNaturesCourse sorry to hear you’re struggling. You can be completely grateful for being pregnant but also totally over it as well. You don’t need to be one or the other!

This is a crazy process and I think having kids and being pregnant should be an Olympic sport tbh 😂.
It was so lovely with my first pregnancy being able to sit and relax after work etc, whereas now we can’t sit down until 8/9pm as there’s baths, dinner, bedtime, tidying etc to be done, so not much downtime which is much needed when you are this far along.

Can you take a day of annual leave if you are still working to have a really relaxing day with the kids in school/nursery?

I’ve had to take this week off as I was close to burn out (and I’m only 32 weeks) and I’ve had no plans, just been taking it each day to do nothing and it’s helping!

@OnNaturesCourse my heart goes out to you reading your post. You're going through so much right now and you're completely within your rights to feel how you're feeling. Pregnancy can be really fucking shit sometimes- I am right with you there now at 34w. You're dealing with so much all at once - pregnancy aches and pains, insomnia, nausea and indigestion, and sick kids! That's so much for anyone to handle!!

Please don't feel guilty for not loving every minute. After the death of your daughter it's natural to feel layer upon layer of emotions about how you "should" be feeling. In truth the only right way to feel is how you feel right now. This isn't a rainbow baby for me but my first daughter was after multiple losses and 7 years of fertility treatment. I had a complicated pregnancy and I felt so guilty every day for not rejoicing in every moment so I completely understand how you feel. This time round I've just accepted that I fucking hate being pregnant! Just because you're grateful doesn't mean you can't be frustrated and exhausted too!! You've been through so much already so it's understandable and normal to just want to feel back to yourself again. That doesn't make you a bad person, it doesn't take away from how much you love this baby, it just makes you human.

On top of everything you're juggling caring for your kids, your family, your bump (yourself?). It says a lot about your strength even if it doesn't feel that way right now.

Please be kind to yourself and I hope you can find even 30 minutes today to put yourself first - can your husband take over while you have a bath / walk the dog / go for a coffee?

I think I can speak for many of the women here when I say you are not alone in feeling how you're feeling right now. I am right there with you. Over it over it over it and just can't baby to be here. Xxx

@OnNaturesCourse I echo what @Firsttimetrier said, you can be completely grateful and know what a blessing it is to be pregnant and still be fed up of it. It's a lot, pregnancy is hard on our bodies and it's often very lonely because it's only you experiencing it within the household and I find very often women who've had baby's can often forget just how hard a time it is.

Regarding the acid reflux/ indigestion, have you asked your GP to prescribe you omezaparole? I was suffering horrendously with it. Everything I ate was causing it, constant belching, food coming back up my throat, actually throwing up from it, it was keeping me awake almost every night. It really is vile. But since I got that prescription it's been so so much better! I take it once every morning, I do then take a rennie after my dinner just to be safe but on the whole it's 90% better. It's also completely safe in pregnancy.
Regarding the cramps, have you tried Epsom salt baths? I was suffering with cramps, I also have pregnancy related sciatica in my lower back, so I have an Epsom salt bath 3xs a week now. The cramps have stopped and it really helps ease my sciatica. May also help with the PGD? Also try and have it before bedtime; you can get lavender infused ones too to help you feel sleepy? Also pregnancy pillow, I'm sure you have one but if not it's been a game changer for my sciatica.
Also! Magnesium rub, also really helps with cramps and sleeping.

The sleep is a problem, I can sleep but I wake 5-6 times a night, just randomly. I'll just sit on the edge of my bed for a while and then dose back off. I sometimes even turn the tv on and keep the volume super low, just watch it and before I know it I've dozed off again. Best you can do with that is nap when you can, if you feel you can. But it sounds like you've had your hands full at the moment with your other kids being ill/off. Do you have grandparents nearby? Or could partner take a couple days off to give you a break maybe?

Keep your chin up. We're so nearly at the finish line and it'll have all been worth it when you're holding your newborn 💖 xxx

Solidarity @OnNaturesCourse third trimester is really shit. And so much harder when you’ve other children to care for.

Have you tried Esomeprazole for the heartburn? I was crippled with it a few weeks ago, guzzling gaviscon all day and vomiting at night. Now take one tablet a day and heartburn is gone.

Ladies who've been pregnant before;

During the last few weeks (4weeks to go until c section date at 39weeks, 5 weeks till official due date) did your bump suddenly spurt? Or did it stay relatively the same as it was at 35/36 weeks.
Curious to know weather I can expect a huge burst of growth 😂 feel like I can't get any bigger!