BFP after recent loss

[purplecolouroffunk]

Hello!

I know there are quite a few threads like this, but thought I’d start a new one for those of us going through this just now 🙂

I found out about my MMC at what should have been 7.5 weeks (no growth since 5). Had to have a D&C as my body wouldn’t let go. That was back in mid-April.

I’ve had one period since then and it now looks like I’m pregnant again! Can’t believe we’ve been so luckily to fall again so quickly.

Got a vfl yesterday at 10dpo and the line is a bit darker today at 11dpo. Pic attached has 11dpo at the top and 10dpo bottom. What a shock when I saw that line!

Anyway, I’m already feeling nervous about everything so I thought I’d make a space for people in a similar position to join. Maybe we can help to calm each others’ nerves a bit 💜

i really love your attitude and approach. You’ve shared some lovely thoughtful words on this thread and even reading you say you feel calm has almost calmed me down! I have moments when I worry but I’d say overall I do feel (strangely) calm too and have done since I got my BFP, almost a what will be will be approach. I’ve no idea where this has come from but I’m taking it! That’s only if I don’t really think about it though. If I think about it I spiral. I really hope your two positive scans can help reassure you as you have proof there that all is well. I know that feeling can be gone the next day though but try to cling on to it as long as you can - this is a new pregnancy and you have every reason to believe it’ll all be ok ❤️ have you been on the miscarriage reassurer? My browser says ‘you visit often’ when I google it which is fun 🙃 but it does help me a lot.

Thank you and I’m so sorry to hear you’ve also had the same rubbish experience. Congratulations too and positive thoughts to us all! Xxxxxxx

Yes, that is what I heard too, that with anxiety from previous loss, often the baby moving brings relief. What if the movements lessen though? 😬 There is always something to worry about. I think with second babies and so on, it can happen earlier at 16-18 weeks. I had anterior placenta first time around so felt not a huge amount until maybe 34 weeks?! If I get there, hopefully it'll be earlier.

Who knew making babies would be so much magic and luck involved! Now that I'm 37, I sometimes wish I started earlier, like I'm running out of time. I had IVF planned this month, it was just so unexpected after 3 MCs and 10 months of TTC. I did hycosy last month and I think it flushed something out that was blocked after my MCs. But then having that perfect sperm and egg... For me numbers and logic don't work anymore, I need some magic ✨

@Lemonbalm8 i am so so happy for you, honestly the best news. It’s made my evening 😊

@Dreamer1987 welcome! I’m really sorry to hear about your experiences. Totally get the head in the sand approach and wish I had the self control to take a similar approach but Im too much of a control freak 🙄😂 I also have a little boy who I had zero symptoms with and didn’t really believe I was pregnant until he started moving around at 18 weeks. The idea of getting that far in a pregnancy now feels mind boggling.

I am about a week into pretty consistent nausea which feels like a bad vommy hangover, although haven’t been sick just lots of gagging and it does come and go. I am also so easily repulsed by things, mostly food related but also random non food things too. Weirdly finding the symptoms not reassuring at all as I had bad symptoms in my last pregnancy, but trying to stay zen and remind myself I am not in control and what will be will be.

Thank you! Hope your scan goes well this week and you get some relief before your trip. Where are you off to? It's so tricky with nausea, I wish for it but that day I got nausea, I'm like "well this could be a notch down". I hope it's not a foodie trip, but maybe take some medicine for the trip from GP in case? I say this because I have fear of nausea 😂 irony in that!

The best news @Lemonbalm8 🥳 so relieved for you!

Welcome @Dreamer1987 I’m sorry for your previous losses but glad you’ve found us 🥰

I had a really weird feeling when I woke up this morning that something wasn’t right. I couldn’t put my finger on it, I had no reason to believe things weren’t okay. Boobs still hurt, nips were still like razors, everything was as normal but I was almost panicking.
Then later in the morning my DD did a 💩 and the smell got to me that bad I needed to go lay down for 20 mins 😂 and that was the reassurance I needed!

Pregnancy after loss is full of the most irrational bullshit. Ever. 😩😂

@Lemonbalm8 luckily it should just be quite a chilled two weeks visiting my husbands family in Germany. The Germans love a good beige carb so I’m sure I’ll be fine, although we’re driving so think I’m going to have to pack travel sickness bands or it’s going to be a long trip 😣

@MrsB2019x ha this made me laugh. God the pooey nappies are now next level and of course they always happen when it’s just me around to change him. I’ve gagged so many times in front of my little boy that he now walks around the house saying mummy sick mummy sick on repeat 😂

@Lemonbalm8 ahh I'm so so happy to read your update!! God what a relief for you. How are you feeling today?

@Dreamer1987 so happy that you've found us. I was so sorry to hear about your losses and that you're feeling anxious. It's so hard after loss, isn't it? You're in the right place! 💜

Morning everyone. How are we all? This is really random but I need to ask the question, since we found out we were pregnant again I haven’t been interest in dtd and can’t think of anything worse than getting physical, is this the same for any one else? I feel like I am neglecting my husband

Thank you, though I'm back to being worried so 😂 at least the sun is out this side of the country, I am finding this summer weather quite depressing. How are you?

I haven't dtd, for me it's not so lack of wanting, more worrying about bleeding. But I know what you mean, they probably feel like sperm donors at some points 😂 I did talk to my husband about maybe trying to wait the first trimester but I'll probably worry in second trimester as well. I think he is fine but also I'm not sure 😂 There are other things to do I guess!

Yeah same for me re bleeding. But I also feel like a grossed out 12 year old, the thought of anything sexual gives me the heebie jeebies. Oh dear haha

Haha yes I think it's totally normal though! It will lift in second trimester. The only time I absolutely didn't want dtd was after birth, for about 2 months, I was just no no.

@Lemonbalm8 it's just so hard not to worry. I'm trying to stay as calm as I can and just enjoy whatever is happening right now, which seems to be working for the moment. Feel a bit like I'm wishing the week away now though for my 8 week scan on Sunday. The weather is awful in Scotland 😅

@Rockyslife I was actually going to ask this today!! I feel like my libido has been totally zapped - it's crap. My DP has been so good though. The other day I said I had a craving for ginger with fizzy water and within 10 mins he was away making some ginger cordial 😭

Also does anyone else have sore abs? I feel a bit like I've done loads of sit-ups, but it's further up than I'd have expected, like abs rather than lower abdomen/womb. Can really feel it when I stretch up for things.

@Rockyslife I feel ya about DTD. We didn’t DTD during the TWW 1. Cos I was worried about jabbing around up there while implantation was happening and 2. Because I was sore from doing it so much to conceive aha😳😅
But since then, the last 4 weeks or so we’ve maybe done it 5 times or so. My husband had a right sulk about it a few weeks ago saying he needs it blah blah blah, and I was like dude I enjoy sex too but the minute I finish work I’m basically asleep and it’s not out of choice.
I feel bad for him but men just don’t seem to understand how hard the first trimester (and pregnancy in general) is! I’ve tried to explain a billion times quite how exhausting the first trimester is but he really struggles to understand how you can be tired when you ‘don’t even have a bump yet’🤦🏼‍♀️😩 so referred him to google lol x

We haven't dtd since my positive test and don't plan on doing it until we reach 12 weeks ish! I'm more worried about irritating my cervix and bleeding and then thinking I'm miscarrying so it's just not worth it. Luckily my husband is on the same page and is very kind about it all

Yep I’ve been the same in all of my pregnancies, had zero interest in DTD whatsoever. During my last pregnancy we had a bit of an argument and he told me he feels like I only use him to make babies 😢 which hurt a lot. But I just don’t feel comfortable doing it, especially after the MMC. It was sex that triggered the bleeding so I’m mega anxious about that again

Had my scheduled scan at my clinic and... everything looks fine! Saw the heartbeat and generally all looking as expected. Admittedly I find it hard to be reassured by anything given that last time round my 12 week scan was fine and I miscarried 2 days later, but for now things are as they should be.

Fantastic news @Persipan! Try and hold onto that reassurance for as long as possible ❤️ xx

That's great! 😊 I'm so sorry this happened to you, I can't imagine. How many weeks are you?

Aw @Persipan that’s brilliant news!! So so happy that everything is going well for you. So much good news in this group 🥹💜

Amazing news @Persipan! Reassurance is never long lasting after loss but try and cling onto it as much as you can 🩷 how far along are you again?