Grad thread: TTC after loss carry on

[Wise0wl]

Hello all,

I just thought I'd set up a grad thread from our TTC threads, now there are quite a few people with their bfps so that we can keep in touch, and there's a forum for those on their TTC journey to check in with us!

I've sifted through the previous threads so think this is a reasonably full list:

*@SnookyPook
*@wyto
*@Aaliyahrae
*@SunSparkle
*@graceinc22
*@Gem0302
*@Bali200
*@Oxalis00
*@GeorgeR28
*@CluelessInLondon
*@HerbaceousPerennial
*@NphysT
*@GoldDustWoman90

I'd love to hear where you all are in your journey. I am approx 4 +2 (so very early!), after two MMCs. Feeling remarkably relaxed as, although I like a plan, I've resigned myself to the fact that there's little I can do to alter the fate of this pregnancy so until later down the line, I just sort of have to roll with it.

@Wise0wl that’s wonderful news, massive congratulations on your lovely little girl. It’s bound to throw up a lot of emotions, even without losses the early days are a rollercoaster so hope you are being taken good care of and looking after yourself as well as the wee one.

@Moosey898 so good to see your (new) name and very gentle congratulations. I found the early days very overwhelming and did ask people not to be excited about it as I couldn’t cope until I would say about 16 weeks. I also took a long time arranging my booking in appointment etc so you are not alone. I am keeping everything crossed for you, it is such a hard time. Hope your new job settles down, and I’m so sorry about your cat.

@samilicious hope you are getting on ok, apart from feeling very very pregnant!

@samilicious @ThelastRolo20 @HerbaceousPerennial thank you guys - my line manager (who is good!) is forcing me to take tomorrow off as compassionate leave which is nice of him. The tiredness of early pregnancy, emotional exhaustion and also having worked at a sports event for 11hrs a day for 3 days with 5am wake up calls is a lot!

How is everyone else? Feel like I'm all down at the moment when I should be happy I'm pregnant again (took 6 months this time, less than the previous time which took 9).

@Wise0wl congratulations my love!! 😍🥰💗 Wonderful news to hear that little lady is safely here! Enjoy all the newborn snuggles 🥰

@Moosey898 have already said hello on another thread but lovely to see you here too. Definitely relate to everything you are feeling right now. We're all here to hand hold! Let us know when you've got anything booked in. Those early appointments were so tough. Sending hugs and hope your way 💗
Very sorry to hear about your little kitty 🐾🌈💕

@samilicious glad your friends little one is doing ok! Hope these last weeks all go well for you! Really not long to go now although it feels like it at the time doesn't it?!

@Wise0wl congratulations! So lovely to hear you have your beautiful baby girl safe and sound.

@Moosey898 gentle congratulations. It's nice to see you here. The first trimester is so nerve wracking.

Wow @Wise0wl well done you, and congratulations - we celebrate with you, as well as remembering the little ones who never got to be 🌈 ⭐How are you finding things? Early motherhood is the most intense transformation... Go gently 💛

@Moosey898 Amazing to see you here! I completely understand the hesitation you’re describing. I remember feeling weirdly annoyed at having a BFP because it meant I was risking all the heartache (and physical trauma) all over again. Strange how you can pursue something and yet feel like that. It’s a complex thing. Sounds like you’ve got lots of other tricky stuff going on atm too. Look after yourself x

@Oxalis00 that describes it perfectly! I am trying to take everything one day at a time, I just don't want to have to go through all that all over again. Maybe I'll be lucky this time, we will see xx

Thank you all 💕 I’m doing remarkably well. I think I used up all my anxiety during pregnancy so now we’re settling in it just feels ‘right’ somehow.

@Moosey898 are you having an early scan? I waited until 6+5 to get in touch with EPU this time round to give the best chance of seeing a heartbeat. I’ve got everything crossed for you 🤞

Hello everyone, I hope you don't mind me popping back on to let you know my little boy arrived safely on Thursday via c-section. I cannot believe he's here and he's mine, he's the most perfect thing I've ever seen.

I'm struggling a bit with the recovery and anxiety but I think I need to cut myself some slack. My husband has been amazing as have our parents.

I hope you and your wee babies are all doing well. You all kept me going during some of my darkest days and I'm so grateful to all of you 🩷

Oh, congratulations @Bugdem123 - beautiful news! So glad your precious little one is here safe and well. It’s quite a miracle, making a little person. (As we all know only too well.) Absolutely be gentle with yourself over the recovery and anxiety - these are such early days and you’re dealing with huge stuff. So much will change over the coming days, weeks and months - you don’t need to be anywhere other than where you are right now.

@Bugdem123 congratulations lovely 🥰 wonderful news xx

Hey @Bugdem123 !
Congratulations on getting your little one into the world safely ♥️ post partum anxiety it a LOT so being kind to yourself is a good way to go. I found writing really helped me, even if just on my phone and deleted later. I wrote a list of everything I was worried about one day and there was 67 things! Quantifying it and getting it out helped me realise my brain was really doing overtime and I shouldn't take its ramblings so seriously. Lots of love to you!

@Bugdem123 absolutely lovely news and massive congratulations on your beautiful boy! I found the early days post birth incredibly difficult and was very anxious - but I promise it does get better fairly quickly, just be really gentle with yourself. You’ve been through a lot and it’s a massive change, anything and everything you’re feeling is normal. You’ll be doing a much better job than you think and hope you feel better soon, it’s hard x

Also little update from me: 20 week scan all clear which was a massive relief. We’re having a little girl. Hope everyone is doing well

Ahhhhh herb so exciting! @HerbaceousPerennial am I remembering correctly do you have a little boy already? Has this made it easier or harder on the name front? Definitely starting feeling more real for me after 20w but not immediately, took a week or two to sink in that things were ok and they did a super detailed check talking us through stuff because I said I was nervous

Ahh lovely news @HerbaceousPerennial - congratulations!

Congratulations @Bugdem123! Lovely news. It took a while for the nerves and adrenaline to settle for me too, go easy for these first days ❤️

And I’m so glad your 20 week scan went well @HerbaceousPerennial!

Thanks all! Starting to sink in that we might actually have a baby 😂 @samilicious yes a little boy already, I was convinced we were having another boy so was stupidly shocked when the sonographer said girl! Yeah she gave us loads of detail about everything she was checking which I found really reassuring and I think has contributed to feeling better. We had a girl’s name picked out before the losses so now debating how we feel about using it, it’ll probably depend on whether we can come up with something we agree on or not. Do you have a name picked out yet?

@HerbaceousPerennial My rainbow baby is a little girl and I have a son. I was also convinced that I was having another boy, even after two scans confirmed she was a girl! Lots of people have said I’m lucky to have one of each but to be honest I just feel so incredibly lucky to have had another baby at all. I hope that you feel like you can start to relax into it in the next few weeks as she starts to move more

@Wise0wl I feel very much the same as you! Thought we only made girls but just happy to have a rainbow baby at all. @HerbaceousPerennial totally get wanting to feel out the pre-loss name pick. Ours was picked out pre-loss too but before we even started attempting to make babies so unless he looks like a totally different name his name will be that 😊

@Bugdem123 congratulations lovely! What wonderful news! As the others have said, those first few days can be completely overwhelming but don't worry, you do settle into it all. Hope recovery continues to go well for you. So happy for you to be this side of it all 🥰 xx

@HerbaceousPerennial congratulations on your healthy 20wk scan! And how lovely a little girl this time 🥰 I found the baby felt much more real once I knew he was a 'he' - felt more real that it was a little person in there!

@samilicious glad to hear everything is going well still and that you are rapidly heading to third trimester now! 💗

Hope everyone else is doing well. Sending Christmas hugs out to all!

Hi all, I’ve had a faint positive today at 9dpo. I’ve already started my progesterone but what’s the consensus on baby aspirin for those without clotting disorders? Initially when I had my first 3 losses a few years ago my consultant said take from positive test, but then when I saw him again in the summer he seemed to have changed his mind and said it only should be taken if there are blood clotting issues! I see so much mixed advice on this. I can self refer to my local EPU for scans due to having recurrent losses previously so I could ring them to ask? I’m tempted to take it if it can’t do any harm, but I’ve seen some things online saying it can affect implantation negatively.

Hi all! My daughter Jessica arrived yesterday afternoon via section due to being transverse - of course always a mix of feelings and there is an element of reflection but she's stunningly perfect if I say so myself! X

@ThelastRolo20 a huge congratulations! How did you find the C-section? Hope recovery goes smoothly for you and you can enjoy the newborn bubble x

@Notsure31 I'm so sorry I missed your post. How are you doing? I've been on baby aspirin from day one, 150mg and I don't have clotting issues - just recurring losses and immune issues. I'm 31 weeks now so nearly there. I've been told to take the aspirin to 48 hrs before induction/csection. X

@ThelastRolo20 oh that’s wonderful news! Many many congratulations on your wonderful little girl, a beautiful name as well 🥰 perfection indeed! How did you find the section? Hope you are doing ok xx

@HopefulH been continuing aspirin and had a scan on the 4th of January where they dated me 5+5 so 2 days behind but saw a heartbeat, I got reassurance for like a day then back to worrying x