Due September - Thread 5! 🐣❤️🧡💛

[Lillers]

New thread! Can’t believe we’re on 5 already.

@WinsandSam I’m due on the 25th and as a teacher I’ll have the summer off anyway, but don’t want to trigger mat leave early so will go back for a week or so in September. My plan is to start mat leave 2 weeks before my due date, which will be 11th September, but if I’m feeling rubbish I’ll just go back for the INSET days and finish around the 5th.

@SC126 thank you! Yes the maternity package isn't bad, although I'm a little anxious at the cut I'll get over a year. No one has sat and explained any of it too me so just guessing what I'll get each month.

Didn't realise you'd lose your leave! Surely they'd have to pay you for it?

Ok so you're pretty similar to me then with finishing a fair bit before due date. I also imagine my date may be earlier as opting for c-section and my age (40)

@Lillers thank you, so hard to know as first child. Unsure how my body will cope with pregnancy, I'm guessing it'll be a struggle 😅

Hopefully you having the 6 weeks off will be the rest you need to allow you to battle a week or so back at work

I was thinking I'd go on maternity leave from mid August - my due date is 1st September. I was 2 weeks overdue with my son, I'm taking a gamble on being late again.

Having said that I'm definitely feeling more tired and unfit this time round, so maybe I'll get fed up with work sooner. I also feel chubby 🙄 I'm quite short, I've turned into a square.

I haven't had a conversation about mat leave with my line manager... We haven't even done any pregnancy small talk. Literally no acknowledgement aside from the initial conversation when I told her I'm pregnant.

@WinsandSam yes I’m also having a scheduled c section so could be a week earlier. Are you nhs too?

I can try and explain you the basics. Your mat pay will be calculated from your April and May pay slips so work as much as you can now to boost it. With the additional time off the last 3 months are unpaid however you can have your occupational mat pay spread over the amount of time you take if you want so you get less each month but then you are not completely without money the last 3 months. The smp can’t be spread. You can email HR closer to the time and they will give you a good estimate of what you will receive each month depending how long you want to take.
you still accrue any bank holidays over the year too so you could add these on at the end if you want with some annual leave.
in my trust we have to use this years annual leave before going off or we lose it no pay for them. We can’t carry them over.

@SC126 thank you, that's really helpful. Yes I'm a nurse NHS.
My colleague did mention about doing some overtime between 17-25 weeks to boost my mat pay so will definitely look into it now I have some 2nd trimester energy.
I'll definitely look at spreading my pay over the 12 months as 3 months of nothing sounds scary.
Yes I need to book my leave in beforehand so calculate I have 5.5 weeks to take with what I've already booked.

@WinsandSam Yep this is my first too, so it is so hard to know how I’m going to feel at that point! I’m very fortunate that I have the summer - because of my role I’ll have to work some of it (I’m a senior leader so across the 6 weeks I’ll probably work for about 2 of them, but spread out) but it should give me the rest I need to be able to get closer to my due date, and also hopefully will mean I’ll have had a chance to get everything ready for the baby.

@WinsandSam I’m not sure if you’re able to with the NHS, but my mat leave advice would be to start official mat leave as late as possible (if you’re having a planned section, can you start mat leave the day of?) and just use annual leave before it. The main reason being at the other end - more time with little one, and saves a few weeks of childcare fees. We saved about £800 (and was still off for 1st bday) with starting mat leave on due date and adding some AL at the end vs my original plan.

I’m planning on taking 2 weeks annual leave at the end of July when I’ll be 34 weeks, officially starting maternity leave at 36 weeks. I had my daughter 6 weeks early though so all feels like a bit of a gamble. And I can’t help but think maybe I should start it earlier. But then if I do go to term I’ll have 6-8 weeks. Will see how things play out.

Hi everyone, I hope you all had a lovely long weekend. Just wondering if anyone is experiencing similar. Since Thursday I have struggled to empty my bladder and my urine flow has been slow (sorry TMI). It can be uncomfortable to go to the toilet but not painful (so not typically sounding like a UTI). I have quite good pelvic floor muscles so can usually hold for a while but when I got to the loo, I struggle. I know my bladder isn’t empty and for an hour or two after, I have an urgency and then the similar pattern (struggle to pass urine etc). Then I go to the loo, my bladder empties and I am fine again. Not sure if I need to go to the GP with this or whether this is a fun new symptoms this pregnancy.

@tierneytarny I recognise some of this - I haven’t had it the whole time but I have been surprised recently that I feel like I want to go, and when I do go there’s just a trickly little dribble 😂. Years ago when I went through a phase of having UTIs, I found that actually drinking loads more seemed to help, so I have started actively drinking more so at least it feels a bit more satisfying when I do go because there’s more of a gush! Apologies everyone if that’s TMI and a bit too descriptive!

I was listening to the podcast “Is It Normal?” which follows the host through her pregnancy, and the 14-16 week one covered bladder issue exactly like this, so that might be worth a listen.

@tierneytarny yes! I have this now and also had it with my first I'm desperate to go then it would feel almost blocked and come out slow like you say, I remember it getting better as my bump got higher :)

Thanks so much @Lillers. I’ve been panicking as not had this in any other pregnancy. I’ll give the podcast a listen and up my fluid intake. Pre-pregnancy I was so good - but too much fluid used to make me nauseous 🤣🙈

Hi all - I've been lurking since the first thread and have found reading along with all of your experiences very reassuring! Thanks for creating such a lovely and open community!

I'm 16 weeks and have started to talk to friends and family irl about my pregnancy but honestly still feel like a bit of a pretender as I've not had many symptoms and don't yet have much of a bump. I briefly felt quite pregnant for a few days after the 12 week scan but it has been feeling quite unreal again lately! I'm considering going for a reassurance/gender scan sometime soon to bridge the gap and help me to get back into excited mode again.

I've got inattentive adhd and am very 'out of sight, out of mind' but would like to start feeling more connected to this wee bean- hopefully once I start feeling movements and have more of a bump it'll all come much more naturally!

I also wanted to ask the hive mind for advice around meals- I'm usually a bit forgetful with food and not much of a snacker but then make up for it with larger lunches and dinners. I'm starting to struggle to finish my usual portions but then end up hungry again quite soon after meals so really need to try and make the move to more little and often eating but that just seems like so much extra decision making in the day!

What go to smaller meals and snacks do you all enjoy?

Any tips for remembering to stay fuelled up instead of having that creeping pregnancy hunger nausea surprise you multiple times a day?

@PoppingUp I would recommend like no-effort snacks that require zero decision making, and just keeping them in your bag all the time - so like a bag of mixed nuts, almonds, walnuts, some dried fruit, some health cereal bars, rice cakes. I find the same as you, large meals are not sitting as well as they used to! And with those snacks each time I think ahh at least that's getting some extra nutrients in too

@PoppingUp In the evening I take the usual portion that I would have had before, and when I can’t eat more (usually about half way through) I put it to one side, tell my husband not to eat it (he’s used to eating what I don’t finish) and usually come back to it 15-20 minutes later.

Aside from that I have snacks everywhere - fruits and yoghurts in the fridge, crisps and nuts in the cupboard and sweets galore in my pockets and handbags!

Just got the results of my booking bloods being tested for Slapped cheek/ parvovirus - turns out I'm immune and have had it previously. I'm so relieved. I'm still glad I kept my son off nursery even though this was the outcome, I felt much less worried while waiting for the result, and we got to spend some extra time together.

Glad to hear that @WolfMother326!

@PoppingUp if you can stomach it, I find 5 small meals vs 3 big ones seem to suit me better at the moment. I love a snack but I always seem to snack on crap lol 🙈 so I’m trying to fill myself up that way instead. (I work from home so it’s quite doable)

its difficult to discuss eating and meals isn’t it, because the idea of what is considered a meal varies between households. Also, the matter in question is the size of the meals.
The average size of a portion varies from people to people.

I had a scan this morning it’s not sunk in! But it’s a girl 😊✨💗

Nub theory and husband were correct after all, just need to try and refrain from shopping too hard now!

@Emmaev thanks, that sounds sensible! Yes I worry in case baby comes early which I know a lot do.. don't want to miss out on some time off!

@tierneytarny yes I get what you mean. I feel desperate to go to the loo and then it feels like hardly anything comes out. Doesn't hurt at all. Unlike nights when I wee like a racehorse! Odd

@PoppingUp hi! Welcome and congratulations 🥳

I am a fellow ADHD mum to be.. also feel little connection to baby currently. Just carry on as normal with life, work, socialising. It's odd really as still seems surreal. Think it will until bump is bigger and I start feeling baby move

@tierneytarny i swear my pee likes to just build up over the day and then it all comes out during the night. Barely anything comes out during the day!

Congrats on another girl 🩷🎀