Due September - Thread 5! 🐣❤️🧡💛

[Lillers]

New thread! Can’t believe we’re on 5 already.

I had 16 week appointment yesterday and honestly the midwife made me feel so awkward. Started by saying I looked worried and stressed and kept asking questions that all felt very targeted to there being something wrong that I wasn't saying. - I had bad anxiety in lockdown and ended up on meds which I disclosed to her at booking in. I've been off and fine for ages.

She also said she wouldn't listen to baby this time for me. But implied she would at some 16 week appointments.

Maybe it's me but I actually came home feeling awful.

Woah @MrsM89 that seems very... inappropriate

I disclosed previous depression, anxiety and self harm to my current midwife and also my midwife when I was pregnant with my son (I have some old scars that are noticeable when my sleeves are rolled up for blood pressure tests etc, so think it's better to disclose rather than be questioned later on).

Neither midwife has been pushy with me at all, when I say I'm feeling fine they move on to the next question.

I would say not to worry too much? If you feel ok generally and don't need extra support, then I would ignore her. I'd have found that really irritating and definitely awkward as well! What kind of thing was she saying? 😬

Also it's really normal to have had a period of anxiety or depression in your life! I'm sure loads of women disclose something similar at booking in, you'd think she wouldn't get such a bee in her bonnet about it!

@YellowZ thank you.

Her opening line was you look very worried today is everything okay. - I wasn't feeling worried or anything. I said I was fine but the questions kept coming thought the whole appointment including

"is everything okay at home?
"how are you feeling about baby, have you had any negative thoughts?"
"sure there's nothing you want to talk about"
"I'd normally see you at 28 weeks but would you like an extra appointment before?"

All Just felt awkward.

I've decided I'm taking hubby or mum next time.

@MrsM89 maybe she'd been on a training course recently and has taken it a little too literal 😅 sounds a bit ott and inappropriate to keep pushing

We finally told DH’s dad today, so then could tell the rest of his extended family and my friends, so we’re finally out in the open. Everyone seems very happy for us which is great. It’s FIL’s birthday and he said it’s the best birthday present he’s ever had ❤️.

One of my friends annoyed me slightly by replying to my message with a photo of me from years ago in a busty dress, asking if my boobs are bigger than that yet? He’s gay and it’s definitely the kind of thing he says, but maybe it’s just because I’m tuning in to all the amazing things my body is doing at the moment that it felt a bit off to be focusing on something so superficial when I’ve just announced I’m creating a life? Maybe I’m just being too sensitive because like I say, it’s 100% the kind of comment I would expect from him - I guess I just wouldn’t have expected that to be the very first response to my news!

@WinsandSam you may be right. I know people have to be careful regarding mental health and more aware incase they can help.

@Lillers I really hope this is not going to sound weird, but some people just can’t relate that much. They are living in their own little universe. Don’t take it to heart please, he probably had not much to say as not very familiar with pregnancy and all the fiesta connected to it. I think that is a funny and a very fruity reaction from him 😂

@WolfMother326 I don’t think there’s anything to feel silly about. Risk factors in pregnancy is such a heavy topic as many things can be dangerous and we are naturally vigilant about it. I read liquorice is bad for pregnancy and it is suggested to avoid it and I haven’t even tried a suspected very good liquorice lip oil I was gifted just because I’m afraid. It’s nonsense but better safe than sorry. If we wouldn’t be vigilant and something bad happened that could have been found earlier or something went past our noses because we were too relaxed..the feeling of guilt would be a tonne heavier than the feeling of silliness from extra worry as means or precaution.

@MrsM89 I don’t think it’s about you, maybe something happened with another case and maybe the midwife is now just going an extra mile? Usually when people come off as pushy 9 out of 10 times it’s not about the subject, it’s about the person who is doing it.

Morning all, my gender scan tomorrow morning! Very excited!

Just wondered has anyone got that Amazon baby wishlist "free gift" to work I gave up couldn't figure it out! Just ordered the changing mat id wanted for ages but was out of stock and some few other bits!!

I'm 16 weeks today, and I feel like the last few nights I can feel movements what I would describe as rolling it feels like the baby is rolling over!! Anyone else?

Any other scans this weekend?

@MrsM89 slightly different but I had a work colleague patronise me about pregnancy anxiety. She is older (relevant as I guess it makes her feel she has authority on these things), she asked me how I was doing, how is the pregnancy. My words were: very good, we're both healthy and happy, but I'm ready to just have this baby, pregnancy is such hard work.

Queue "if you're anxious now, you'll be so much worse when baby comes". I said I'm not anxious, I'm totally fine. Then she kept going on about anxiety and prenatal depression, and how I have no idea how hard I'll find having a baby because once they're out, you worry about them all the time. It was a 5 minute lecture luckily interrupted by another colleague bringing in Easter chocolates.

Wtf? I never even implied I was worried and anxious. I felt so awkward and patronised ( in a work environment no less!).

Good luck tomorrow @TripleESept24 our gender scan is a week tomorrow and I want to fast forward!

I tried the Amazon wishlist too and it confused the hell out of me so I gave up 😂

Gosh I’m exhausted at the minute. I’ve been very tired throughout the pregnancy, but this is another level! When we were visiting FIL yesterday I was dozing off on his sofa. Today, we went for a lovely walk and I fell asleep on a bench! Currently fighting to keep my eyes open because if I have a nap this late in the evening I won’t sleep well tonight, and if I give up and go to bed now I’ll be awake again by midnight.

@TripleESept24 mine is on Tuesday! Ekkk I would skip the long weekend if I could 😜
Good luck tomorrow!

@TTCSoManyQuestions88 oh that's just miserable so sorry they were a twerp. Some people just put their foot in it don't they. I was young with my first but not wildly young (but not married) and a lady at work whom I'd never met said "what did your parents say?" Ummm sorry I was lost for words 😂

@Lillers snap on the tiredness I had a late snooze today.. but then sleep 9-10 hrs and still struggle to wake!!!

Anyone else getting heartburn already?! I only had a jacket potato 🥴

I'm so excited I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight!! Lol

I've been getting the odd bit of heartburn..... My worst thing and it feels so early for this is leg cramps and swollen sore ankles especially at night struggling to get comfy to sleep already 😭😭😭

@TripleESept24 I'm so keen to see if our nub theory was correct! And my gut instinct ... I'll update of course.
It is like Christmas makes it feel so real 🩷

I invested in a bbhugme early (wish I'd hunted online for a second hand haha) but it helps hugely with getting comfy and dropping off. It is a bit of a blockade between husband and I though.. but he doesn't moan luckily 🥴
Not sure it'll help my heartburn is ramped up now!!

Raise your ankles as much as possible? I got swelling with my first and cool water and raising them up helped. If they persist definitely tell midwife x

Thank you?! All guesses have been girl? We shall see later!! 🥰

I will look for the bbhugme and try raising my feet thank you! I have midwife Tuesday too so definitely will be mentioning it! Woke at 2am last night really struggling!!!

@TripleESept24 my mum explained to me that swollen legs in pregnancy are linked to salt intake. She said the salt is filtered out by the liver, if the liver clocks we take on too much salt, it begins to retain liquids.
a friend of mine who has extreme issues with swelling, she was consuming too much salt for the majority of her life and the pregnancy just highlighted it, as she was still adding a lot of salt and essentially her swelling was so bad she could barely walk from 7 months onward, she was due in October and the summer temperatures made the swelling even worse. The swelling persisted even after childbirth, it took about a year to fully come off. She literally had no ankles and her toes looked like baby potatoes.

@TripleESept24 this was just 6 months pregnant.
Im really hoping to avoid this.

Wow!!

Well I don't eat much salt but will be wary!! No swelling in my toes it's literally my ankles that feel swollen and grizzly when I massage them! I've only put on about 6 pounds too which I don't think is bad at 16 weeks? I was always around 10 stone 10 and when I weighed last week was 11 stone 1

Gender scan was so reassuring! Heard the heart beat and measuring bang on for 16+1.....

And it's a GIRL... 🩷 All though I have the funniest story .......
So they count down to 3 and light the room up pink or blue..... They lit the room BLUE! I GO oh my god!!!!! My partner caught it all on camera ..... Then the sonographer goes I'm really sorry it was meant to be pink there's something wrong with the remote! ( He did show us he pressed pink)
🤣🤣🤣 my partner saw he put female in the notes half way through aswell so he was like what the hell hahahaha

@TripleESept24 congratulations!! Great to see all your guesses were corrected and a funny story to boot 😂🥹
hope you celebrated together afterwards 💗
Cannot wait for mine on Tuesday I want to shop!

@TripleESept24 yay congrats on your little girl! 🩷

I think we must be evening out now at one point the thread was very boy heavy 😄

Congrats @TripleESept24! :) 🎀💜👑

Jealous of everyone having their scans and finding out what they are having, my 20 week scan isn't for another couple of weeks and it's felt like I've been waiting forever since the 12 week one 😅 currently 17 weeks and today instead of feeling my usual insatiable hunger, I've felt quite queasy and not fancied much to eat, we went for a drive to take the dog for a walk along the beach and actually thought at one point I was going to be sick 🤢 hoping it's not a sign of the nausea returning as I've gotten away with it lightly this pregnancy (I had HG in 1st pregnancy) it's nice to have these threads to have a little vent or chat on, as I don't know anyone else IRL whose pregnant right now so I feel like other then DH I don't have many people to talk to about pregnancy stuff

Congrats @TripleESept24 !! Lovely pics x

It’s our first wedding anniversary on Monday, but because of the leap year etc it was this Saturday last year that we got married. Celebrating with a takeaway.

Last night dh cooked fish because it was Good Friday. Despite having the windows and doors open all day, spraying various things, and scrubbing the kitchen clean, I can still smell fish - this heightened sense of smell is so annoying! Hoping when the takeaway arrives it’ll mask the last of the lingering fish odour.