Pregnancy after loss support

[Hopingrae]

Hi ladies, I've recently found out I'm pregnant again after 2 losses in a row. I'm very lucky to have a DS and I had another MC before I had him. So 3 losses in total. I'm only 4+4, but got faint positive 11 days ago at 9dpo and it feels like I've been pregnant for aaaages but time is moving so slowly. We've booked an early scan when I'll be 8 weeks exactly so waiting it out until then, and hoping nothing happens in between. I wondered if anyone else is in a similar position and wanted to share this early journey with me. I've decided not to tell anyone this time round, a lot of my close friends are dealing with newborns or their own ivf journeys and I don't want to add any load to anyone. But it feels like a huge load to me so would love to share with someone!

Awww roll on 2 more sleeps for you @LER2023 🙌 I totally agree about celebrating each milestone 🥂

I know we shouldn't be wishing our lives away but I feel tentatively more hopeful as each week passes (whilst still guarding my heart and being aware of possible things that can go wrong 😕)

The crazy thing about this pregnancy for me is that my dates are almost identical to last year. my ovulation/conception/bfp and even estimated due date is only a day off last year. The last few weeks have felt so bitter sweet and poignant 🥺 I've feel like because I've just passed the mmc milestone that i can focus on new ones. I have my nipt bloods and scan on the 19th and my midwife appointment and 12 week scan on the 25th so counting the days until then 🙏

Is anybody else on this thread due around the mid October having 12 week scan at the same time? i'd imagine the anxiety levels will be through the roof for us by then!

Im due around 14th of October, my 12 week scan should be around start of april, but im going for a private scan on 26th to see baby, then im contacting the midwife.

My partner seems to think its something to do with the midwife that i keep miscarrying the day of seeing her or the day after, like my body just uncontrollably gets worried over the blood test although i dont feel scared of them anymore. Since i was in hospital for 2 days with a canula in, i just found it fasinating rather than painful🤣

And my midwife took my bloods the first time and second time the student took my bloods and it happened straight away.

My first baby should have been born around his sisters birthday in july, and my second should have been born around his birthday in march so since theres no birthdays apart from my brother on 6th of october, theres no other birthdays that will come up around that date!

Im waiting to book in with the midwife however im waiting for that scan more so then i can see baby has a heart beat rather than my midwife telling me again that shes shocked to see me so soon🫠

Im praying for a heartbeat on 26th of March. Ive planned it on 26th as id be 11 weeks or there abouts and its his birthday so i feel like it will be memorable if we see a heartbeat on my partners birthday🥹

If not it will be the shittest birthday hes ever had and it will be my fault but hey ho🤣🤣

He agreed to it rather than going the weekend before lmao however im still trying to get him to agree to the weekend before so the 23rd/24th!

I hope my due date is around the date your looking for! X

Congrats @LER2023 and @Sez281
what amazing news. So happy for you both truly 💖

Our milestone will be hearing both heartbeats on Friday. I will be 8 weeks I had a same scan at around the same time last year at 8+3 when we were told we had a MMC. We never had the opportunity to hear a heartbeat. Hoping for a different outcome this time ❤️

@30somethingttc I've just read back over the thread and see that you're having twins, that's so amazing, especially after what you went through 🥹 I assume you have had ar least one scan so far right see both sacs? How is the spotting now? Roll on Friday, will be crossing everything for you 🙏

@LER2023 My estimated due date is the 11th of October so very close, hopefully 😊

You have amazing willpower to hold off until the 25th. (Although I know it's probably more anxiety than willpower 😕) Will it be easy to get a quick midwife appointment in your area once you confirm all is ok with your private scan? Like you I was nearly afraid to jinx it by registering with my consultant but I called the day I left the epau and they've managed to fit me in to meet the midwife at the right time so hopefully you're the same! I have a good feeling that it will be a lovely birthday present for your OH 🤞

@Hopingrae I forgot to respond to your reply to my first post. Thanks for the welcome and for setting up this thread. I know you already have a DC so hope you and any other ladies who already have children have a lovely Mother's Day.....and for those of us with our first little beans growing hopefully this is the first of many Mothers days to come🌷🌈 💓

So good you got into the midwife as the right time @Sez281!

Spotting as ended thank you! I think I might have passed the blood clot but will wait to see what they say on the scan. So grateful to not be bleeding any more.
Yes we were having scans as they thought I was having an ectopic pregnancy because they were taking a while to show on scan which apparently is normal but then she said oh there’s one sac and there’s another. The look on our faces was priceless and both just burst out laughing. Only saw the gestational sac and the yolk because it was quite early so praying they’ve developed and will have heartbeats 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻although finding it hard to stay optimistic but hopefully this time will be different for all of us.

feeling so lucky to have this thread as a little safe haven and grateful for everyone’s support!

@Sez281 very similar, I’m due the 5th oct. Have my 12 week scan on 25th. I’ve got my nipt test on Thursday but it’s private through the nhs so no scan as well. Two weeks feels like a really really long way away though for another scan.

Feel like it's way to early to be having symptoms as I'm only 4+2 but I'm exhausted and have had a head he for the past two days. So Im completely off my food too. So it's either pregnancy or I'm getting ill 😭. X

@Chaz693 headaches were probably my only symptom at the start of this pregnancy. I had a constant one from about 8dpo until about 5 weeks😣. Unfortunately as soon as that eased the nausea, tiredness and digestive cramps took over 🙈Hopefully it's a symptom for you and you're not coming down with anything 🤞

@30somethingttc So glad to hear that your spotting has passed. They saw a haematoma on my 1st epau scan this pregnancy and said that I may have some spotting but I think I got lucky and it was absorbed naturally. Have you been prescribed progesterone? If not maybe enquire about it at your next scan, given your mc history and the fact that you are carrying two it might be helpful 🤞

@Nic2908 We're very similar in dates, the scans feel like a lifetime away don't they 😣 it's like the conception tww but 100 times worse! I've tentatively booked some time off work for May. If we hopefully make it to the 16 week scan 🤞 we're going to go away to the sun for a couple of weeks as it's such a long wait to the 20 week one! I find holidays a great distraction from google/MN etc and am hoping my sickness and tiredness will have subsided enough by then to go and enjoy it! 🙏

They said I don’t need progesterone because mines already high but it’s hard because the guidance doesn’t really say anything about levels.
I thought about asking them to refer me to another EGU for a second opinion but I am having such great care there it’s a tough decision.
I am seeing another consultant Friday so definitely going to get another opinion although this will be my third at the hospital 🤣

@Chaz693 i felt exhausted pretty early on, I’ve only just started going to bed after 9 the last week or so! Just got to listen to your body and embrace the early nights 😴

can I ask about the testings, the NIPT testing is a more in depth test on top of NHS one or instead of? If you got the NHS one it just wouldn’t be as accurate?

@30somethingttc that's great that you're being so well looked after. I think every hospital is different. I have normal progesterone levels but was prescribed by my consultant last October to start taking from as soon as I got my BFP (I think because of my MC history and my age 🤷‍♀️) it definitely doesn't prevent miscarriages but there's anecdotal evidence to say it supports pregnancy. It really sounds like you're being so well looked after and they'd definitely prescribe it if they think you need it.

@Chaz693 I'm not sure how it works as I'm not under the NHS because I'm not UK based. I'm paying privately for my Nipt test at 10+5 as I'm 41 with no living children and just feel that it's something I can do for peace of mind

@30somethingttc so the nipt is a more superior test to the nhs is my understanding. I won’t have the screening by the nhs because I will have had the nipt. If you are high ratio for anything they offer nipt on the nhs. I feel like I have made no sense in that at all. Testing is such a personal choice isn’t it and I don’t think there is any right or wrong answer for people’s preferences.

Good morning everyone, i hope you all had a really nice mothers day!

Just thought id ask how everyones getting on?

Either my symptoms have vanished or new ones have come haha still exhausted, feeling a lot more hungry now, but we are getting better by the day, nausea has subsided more now, although i read that 9 weeks nausea can be the worst, but i think i got that at 7 - 8 weeks.

On the count down to my scan now! I kinda want to refer myself to EPU early so i can see if everythings okay, but dont fancy going alone and my partner will be annoyed if i go without him🤣

I keep forgetting to take my folic acid... my baby brain has started early and its bad!

Morning @LER2023 how long is it until your scan?

I’m around 5 weeks - have sore boobs, and the occasional sick feeling. Oh and very bloated! But otherwise I feel ok.

I’ve still not arranged my booking in appointment. I just keep expecting something to go wrong.

Every single time I go to the loo, I’m checking for blood. Anyone else always doing this?! I feel pretty paranoid about it.

Hey ladies, I'm v v v early yet, 4 weeks +5 and I have zero symptoms. I do feel tired but I put that down to my toddler not sleeping. It's making me panic a little as I had very few symptoms with my last pregnancy. I check every time I wipe too I think I'll do that for as long as I'm pregnant.

I just want to fast forward to a time I can know everything is ok, but I guess that's when the baby is here safe and sound and I also don't want to wish my pregnancy away as it'll be my last (if successful)

Managed to get my partner to agree to next weekend. So rest if this week and next to go. Saturday 23rd cant come quick enough! 9 + 1 today, ive come to work and had some juice and now i feel sick, but i just want to eat all my lunch now😪 so maybe my symptoms are coming and going and im just getting excited about feeling myself too soon🤣

I havent had my booking appt with my midwife. Im waiting until aftet the scan to ring my doctors and get booked in for it.

Before my first miscarriage i never thought about checking for blood... im on my 3rd pregnancy, hopefully pregnant with my first live baby.
And i always check for bleeding now. Its just a regualr thing for me, i'll even use panty liners to make sure i catch anything as i usually wear black underwear! Just a waiting game and the first trimester takes AGES!!

@BEY my symptoms didnt start until around 5 1/2 - 6 weeks gone and then everything hit me like a ton of bricks, the tiredness hit me so hard i couldnt stay awake past 7!!! Then 7 weeks come and the sickness started, i luckily wasnt being sick but the nausea was horrendous!!

I swore to myself I'd stop testing. As it's gone from giving me comfort to convincing me of another loss. My easy at home tests aren't getting any darker and now I'm convinced this is going to end again. I'm 16dpo and the test are still light and just don't seem to be getting any darker. My digital is stuck on 1-2. I think I need to just stop testing and see what happens but it's almost like I need them to prewarn me of something bad coming. X

@LER2023 morning lovely. I'm 6+5, time is passing by! My symptoms keep shifting too, it's a bit disconcerting isn't it. My nausea is present most of the time but definitely have waves of feeling really sick and then just a little bit. I'm feeling tired too.
@Bey I don't think I had symptoms then apart from tiredness either. Hang in there lovely.
@Chaz693 oh bless you. I stopped testing around AF due date, it's so hard isn't it. I've read lots about CB digital not always being the most accurate with dates, so hopefully that doesn't mean anything.
@Figtree11 I know how you feel, I wasin two minds about sorting a booking appointment for ages.

Oh ladies, we've had a very awful and tragic and very sudden family bereavement over the weekend. I'm really not sure about going for scan at 8 weeks next week as I don't feel like I can cope with dealing with anything else at the moment and don't want to put any more on my DH. I'm thinking of cancelling it and just waiting it out until 12 weeks if I get that far. I can't speak to DH about this at the moment as he's got to much going on with his family. Will see how I feel next week. It might mean having booking appointment without scan but I'm not sure I care at this stage. Life is so bloody hard sometimes. 😢

I'm so sorry for your loss @Hopingrae life is so cruel at times. I understand why you'd rather not have your 8 week scan now. I'm in two minds about scans as although yes they can be reassuring they can't stop something from happening if it's going to so I kind of feel is there any point in having one before the 12 week scan unless there's any bleeding or something. However I also feel it's such a long time to wait u til the 12 week scan too. I think in your position I'd probably cancel the 8 week scan too.

be extra kind to yourself in this extremely difficult time I'm so sorry again

I’m really sorry @Hopingrae
I agree with Bey, I’m not sure I’ll be having an early scan unless I have any issues so think I’d wait too

@Hopingrae im so sorry for your loss. Bereavements are so hard. You have to do what is right for your family. Xx

Hi ladies, I've started bleeding heavily so I think this is going to same way as my last one. But thank you for all your support. I hope you all continue to have healthy pregancies and get your rainbow babies. Xx

Oh @Chaz693 I’m so sorry. I don’t know what else to say except sorry & that I’m gutted for you. Sending love x

@Chaz693 oh I'm so sorry, that's so hard. Sending lots of MN hugs your way. I hope you're getting lots of support xx

@Figtree11 @Nic2908 @Bey thanks you so much for your kind words. After lots of thinking today, I'm feeling fairly sure I would prefer not to go ahead with the private scan next week. But hopefully DH and I can talk about it over the weekend when he's back from family. It's helpful for me to be able to talk about it on this lovely thread x

I'm so sorry @Chaz693 thsts so heartbreaking and just so unfair take care of yourself xx