Due December 2023 part 2

[Landsmen]

New thread. Will tag people shortly. Tag anyone from the first

My cramping has been so bad today. It’s not cramping as such but niggles really low down, like kind of behind my vagina 🫣 is this normal? Also not sore but definitely noticeable! Worrying me!

I just had my booking apt yesterday (7+5) which took 1hr30 😅 but I've been referred to perinatal mental health team just because of my recent depression diagnosis, so I feel very supported. They said the dating scan letter would come through in the next 3 weeks and the apt will be sometime in June.

@DaisyMay25 I had that before I started taking the anti sickness, it's helped loads though as I didn't have any at my booking apt yesterday. Hope you feel better soon x

@Charlielechat glad you saw a little heartbeat 💕

@Mummy1502 yay! Glad it's all looking good x

@smldnlove cyclizine is the only thing letting me eat atm

Ooh and I tried the eat a biscuit before you get out of bed thing this morning and it really did help, so try that if you get a horrible wave of nausea as soon as you stand up.

@joyjoy23 im with you with the smells! Never had it with my first but it's SO strong this time around

@99SR very normal, just everything stretching and getting into place, try not to worry x

Thank you @Justanothercyster it’s so hard not having anyone to talk to in person. Only my partner & my boss know. I’m trying so hard to get past the point I had my last MMC without telling anyone. Thank goodness for you guys 🩷

@SunSparkle Glad your booking in went well! Sorry if you mentioned already but how was your last birth? I’m very interested in having birth debrief. How do you get one?

I’m already worried about giving birth, my first one was a failed induction leading to emergency c-section. The consultant was really pushing for the c- section from the minute I walked through the door. In the end the consultant bullied me into a c-section by saying I was harming my baby by not. After she had left the room, the midwife apologised and said she couldn’t see anything wrong with the baby’s stats and even got the head midwife to check. But after the consultant saying this for 10 hours I felt I had to have the c-section. It was a truly awful experience.

My son was born healthy and no signs of any other issues with the placenta, cord etc but the pressure the consultant put me under I will never forget. I’d really like a birth debrief, I had never heard of them until now! Sorry for the essay!

What is a birth debrief?

@99SR I find MN so amazing support wise x

@Moriquendi a debrief is a great idea, you need to feel in control next time. They shouldn't have pressured you. Our stories are really similar, I had a 5 day horrible induction which failed but I actually begged for the section in the end as I was so exhausted. My midwife has offered me a debrief too so I'm looking forward to that because I actually can't remember much of what happened!

@OnNaturesCourse it's where they go through your birth notes word for word and you have a chance to ask questions about why things were done a certain way. It's a great way to be prepared for your next birth and feel like you can make better informed choices

@Moriquendi and @OnNaturesCourse its just as @Justanothercyster said. You might have noticed when you were labouring last time that a midwife writes in your notes at least every 15 minutes. They note down how you seem, anything of note from your trace (if you’re being monitored), any meds given, any consultants checks etc.

even if you didn’t have a traumatic birth it’s useful to have a debrief to feel in control of your previous birth and make planned decisions for the future.

you have to request one - often it’s the senior midwife at the hospital and sometimes a consultant but they walk you through all the notes from your birth and you can ask questions.

I went to 42 weeks waiting to labour and just never spontaneously went into labour. I had wanted a home birth due to covid and not wanting to be in hospital. However I went into hospital for induction on 42+1. I had a very strong/quick reaction to the drip medication, an epidural that only partially worked and then after a small episiotomy, I had a large post partum heamorrage which at the time I wasn’t aware of but it was large and it was scary for my partner. I’m trying to make sure I understand what my risk factors are for another PPH and what choices I can make this time. As well as discussing choices for if I don’t go into labour spontaneously, I don’t think I’d like the drip again because it doesn’t agree with me, so I’d like to discuss what choices I have eg elective c-section or other forms or induction.

there was a huge amount of good in my birth and a huge amount of things that weren’t my first choice but were the best choice in the circumstances. And a lot of it is fuzzy. I cannot stress how much knowledge is power and being flexible and open to working through new scenarios as the arise.

I too had several pushy consultants wanting me to go for c-section throughout my labour but none could justify why.

Still no nausea really (starting to hope I might escape it…) but omg, the exhaustion. I’m going to bed at 10am, waking up at 8am (getting up in the night to pee) but I can’t keep my eyes open.

Really struggling to stay focussed at work.

Im supposed to be running a face to face training course in two weeks and it’s a two hour train ride away / a hotel stay and not sure I’ll be able to do it. I need to tell work asap if so so they can get a replacement.

Is the exhaustion likely to get better or worse? (7 weeks on Saturday, Course is when I’m nine weeks)

I feel awful today. Have been getting worse and worse nausea over the last few days. Today I can't even face the thought of eating. The thought of everything is making me feel sick. I'm on a late shift at work tonight until 1030pm and back in at 7am tomorrow, with a 45 min drive. What foods are others managing to eat with bad nausea.

@Mushroo I'm 9 weeks today and this week has been my worst yet...not to say you'll feel the same but I'm struggling to even wfh today, contemplating phoning in sick. I do have slight nausea as well but it's the exhaustion that's the reason I'm struggling.
If I was you, I would tell your work anyway, even if you end up being fine and doing the training, at least you've given them a heads up if not.

@Mushroo I wish I’d kept a diary of my previous pregnancy but for me I’m pretty sure weeks 6-7 were the worst for tiredness and nausea and then symptoms got better but it’s so individual it’s hard to know what you’ll be like.

@Flowers90 salt and vinegar crisps are helping my nausea

@NoodleQueen90 @ThomasinaLivesHere thanks both, helpful hear from others.

I think I’ll tell them on Monday with the caveat I might be fine, but work out how easy it is to source a replacement for me…

The course only happens once a year so it’s the worst timing 😂

@Mushroo I think weeks 6-8 were my worse. Now week 10 and I feel like things started getting better (nausea and tiredness) from 9 weeks. Everyone's different though and might do no harm to tell work anyway.

@SunSparkle @Moriquendi @OnNaturesCourse & @Justanothercyster

I had my birth debrief last week for the birth I had in June 2022. It was Ok, was interesting to see the timings of things as I had no concept of time - however some small things that were written simply did not happen which annoyed me when I wasn't annoyed before!

My waters broke so I went in as I were a few days early and no contractions, she wrote "patient requested speculum check as not convinced it's waters". I 100% did not ask to have that horrid device put in and when she showed me via swab test that it was my waters I obviously was convinced! So weird to write something so false.

There was no note saying if I was dilated at all at that time, which was bad of them, she didn't say I was and for me to go home and come back for an induction in 24 hours if things didn't start.

2.5 hours later I was back in as contractions were so intense I couldn't talk or walk - they weren't close together or lasting longer than 20 seconds though. Midwife said I was 8cm on arrival and could go in the pool. We know she said 8 as we messaged family. But in my notes it said 7. I know it's SO minor and really doesn't matter, but it still bugs me.

I wanted a debrief as I found my birth traumatic and a lot more painful than I expected, I did positive birth so was keen on breathing techniques and gas and air only in the pool. Baby was back to back and my contractions only ever lasted 15-30 seconds until he was here, averaging 20 seconds. I had no time to push him out so it was really really hard and the push stage was prolonged. I asked her why my contractions didn't last long even at the end as i can't find anything online that speaks of this, it puts me off a second natural birth as I'm fearful it will happen again - she said she hadn't come across that before and doesn't know how or why that happened - so not hugely helpful there.

Overall I'm glad I had a debrief as at least it gave me an opportunity to ask questions, definitely worth it.

I had an ultrasound today coincidentally as I’ve had it booked for ages for another medical issue.

All was fine medically, and he did a cursory look at the baby and said there was definitely something in there and it’s in the right place! Not a proper scan of course but I’ll take for now!

@Flowers90 for me the last week has been the absolute worst. Im 9+5 today and the sickness and exhaustion has ramped up. Had to call in sick today as just not sleeping and headache last night and sickness kept me awake. I wfh but laptop work and headache not good combination. Think after my 12 week scan I'm going to have to tell them.

Yesterday at about 7 weeks was my worse day, was almost collapsing at work. So got sent home and spent the rest of the day in bed and spent today in bed too. Got might anti sickness tablets so managing to eat a bit and hoping I feel better from it. Scan tomorrow 🤞🏻🤞🏻

My nausea is still on the up... So far I've managed not to be sick aside from water spit up. I'm 9 weeks tomorrow. I've read hormonal nausea peaks between week 9 & 10 so here's hoping we are all over it soon!

I literally dread eating now, I eat and I get heartburn and reflux plus nausea, I don't eat I get a high gag reflex and nausea. Really can't win.

I am 10 weeks and feel my nausea has peaked in the last week and a half. Tired all the time and unable to function at all in the afternoon. I've also had some cold symptoms for a few days which are making it worse! Hopefully all will be gone by week 12.

@Flowers90 plain toast with butter is my main go to at the moment, pretty much the only thing that doesn't put me off. Carbs in general also work for me but sometimes with mixed success - I've been alternating between plainish pasta and roasted potatoes for dinner for more than a week. You could also give sour foods a go - vinegar crisps or pickled gherkins. Not great variety here but hopefully giving you some ideas of things to try.🤞🏻

I've been for my 12 week scan, although I knew I was a bit behind. Measuring 11+1 but the baby was 1mm to small to give an actual due day apparently according to trust guidelines so booked for a second scan in 2 weeks time. Turns out I'm probably due in November though but I like this group so staying put.
My vomiting has started to easy up, only feel nauseous 70% of the time now which is good and definitely starting to feel less exhausted. My skin is also clearing up to, as I've been having terrible breakouts

My nausea has eased up the last 2 days, trying not to worry about it but rather enjoy being able to eat! 8 weeks today. Anti sickness may be finally helping though.

@Landsmen that's annoying, but at least you get to see bub twice- bonus!

@Landsmen oh that's lovely and get to see it again soon too bonus

@OnNaturesCourse I read also that hormones peak at 9 to 10 weeks so let's all cross fingers it dies down for us all soon.

@wannabemum38 Oh I hope so!! 🤢 It's really ramped up in the last couple of weeks.

Glad to hear about all the positive scans. That is brilliant news! @Mushroo That was handy!

I hope you feel better soon @DaisyMay25

Has anyone got any food aversions? I never had this in my previous pregnancies. I have gone completely off of chocolate which is unheard of for me and I suggested adding bacon to the coronation quiche recipe - OMG the smell! I couldn't even bare to read the word bacon the other day 😆

@Rainbowdust557 I went off chicken last time and I had fajitas the other night and the chicken made me start to feel queasy so I think it might be chicken again 😂