Almost 48 and pregnant- what the actual firetruck?

[Goodgreiftroolyrooly]

NC for this (long time poster).

My head is in a complete spin. I'll be 48 next month and have a 6 y/o I gave birth to when I was 41. It took seven years and two miscarriages to produce our dear child. I so thought I was done.

No, I haven't used contraception or even kept up with avoiding sex in mid-cycle. Yes, I'm an idiot. But I so thought that was all over....

We are so not up for this. No way. Looking at my options.

Holy fuck, really? Thanks for letting me rant, I cannot believe this.

I think you have to 'intervene'. Please do not wait and assume that you will miscarry.

Unless you are wealthy enough to afford high levels of support, I would not wish menopause with a baby on anyone, let alone a child who may well have SN. You would be surprised at how quickly all the prolife fanatics disappear when you are in this position. Perhaps you have already had an insight into this with your little girl.

It is your decision OP, the baby is your flesh and blood, and in your body, and it is 100% your choice.

Total shock for you op.

I am the same age as you, and I would consider going through with it if ONLY I had the energy. But I don't. Life is already exhausting as it is - and you would be 66 by the time they reached adulthood and pushing seventy before they even completed uni...personally I couldn't even think about it. So many things could go wrong as well. I don't think you can assume at this point good health either.

You might find this ancient column from the guardian useful www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2010/jan/09/luisa-dillner-pregnant-older-mum

@blippi123 seriously? If OP was 28 or even 38 I'd agree they shouldn't be shocked. But falling pregnant naturally at almost 50 is vanishingly rare, even without years of infertility.

No but I think your cage is rattled😇
its not ops choice

Yikes OP. I'm just a year older and if this had happened to me I would be thinking the same way.

@Babochan88 of course it is. She would be carrying and birthing the baby, raising them, and supporting them financially. God won't be doing that.

At least you have realised fairly quickly. That's good that you know what you want to do. I would do the same.

Actually it is OP’s choice, nobody else’s. You can pray and post all the patronising guff you like but you can’t change that. Should she choose to terminate there’s a grand total of fuck all you can do about it.

Is God going to do 100% of the childcare then?
Why would you wish an unwanted child into the world, that's pretty sick.

It would be a shock here too, but I've heard of 50 year olds in my family tree so I'm not taking chances

Her body, her choice. End of.

What a ridiculous statement. Of course it's her choice.

Blimey OP what a nightmare - I agree with others - I'd get something sorted asap rather than waiting to see if you M/C

I'm 52 and this would be my reaction as well x

Good luck - and ignore the god bothers x

Never heard of infertility? Ten years of TTC here and never a whiff of a natural pregnancy here. I can fully understand OP not using contraception.

@Babochan88 Can you sod off the thread. A Christian here and I recognise the right for any woman to have an abortion. OP obviously doesn't see the pregnancy as a blessing and wants to terminate. Glad the law allows it.

How awfully sad and depressing.

What do you mean?

i am the same age. There wouldn’t be any doubt in my mind that I am not putting my body through the stress of a pregnancy. My job is to stay as healthy as possible and stick around as long as possible for my daughter.

I'm glad you're both very clearly on the same page OP, but I'm sorry you've had to make the decision. Look after yourselves and don't just wait for a miscarriage that may never come x

OP - Please make an appointment with the GP and seek counselling if you need it. It's a massive shock and I can't imagine falling pregnant at that age.

I don't know what the statistics are for mc at that age, but would imagine it to be quite high, although this isn't to say you should wait and let nature take its course. GP appointments can take up to a few weeks (depending on where you live) so you very well mc anyway until then.

Good luck with whatever you decide.💐

I'd echo others saying "don't trust to nature to solve the issue for you".

I knew someone who got pregnant at 48, had been having irregular periods so when they stopped altogether she just assumed she was menopausal. She didn't discover she was pregnant until she was 32 weeks! And the baby had a non-suvivable (outside the uterus) genetic problem :(

There's often not a "right" answer to these situations, but there's often a "best" answer.

Hope all goes smoothly for you now, OP.

@Babochan88

people like you do rattle my cage actually, you’re so out of touch

anyway end of the day is - we live in a part of the world wherein the only person who can decide whether or not op continues this pregnancy is op

yay 😀

@BlodynGwyn

?

Whatever I have brewing now must be a genetic shitstorm anyway.

Not necessarily @Goodgreiftroolyrooly . That's partly the luck of the draw. I understand not wanting to go through the stress and extra risks, though.