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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Navigating pregnancy after loss thread 5!

785 replies

barneymcgroo · 02/10/2022 09:54

Probably time for a new thread - forgive me if I forget anyone...

@Annny27 @arianasky @B1993 @Bridgey8 @calimc83 @chasingtherainbow1 @Elspethelf @flowergarden16 @IWillBeWaxingAnOwl @Mrs173 @Prayingformyrainbow93 @Skl2021 @Srx1 @sunnyd67

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calimc83 · 08/10/2022 21:10

Fits/Flys @DrinkingAllTheGin huge congrats lovely xxx

arianasky · 08/10/2022 22:45

@barneymcgroo Amazing news congratulations 💕💕

DrinkingAllTheGin · 08/10/2022 22:57

Congrats @barneymcgroo !

Just home after a long afternoon. Did tell my family after all the other guests had left. All very pleased for us. DP are off on a long 5 week holiday soon so pleased we could tell them before they go.

B1993 · 09/10/2022 07:00

@calimc83 Thanks! Hopefully I'll be able to update Thursday with some good news! 🤞🏻💗

@DrinkingAllTheGin That's great news! It's such an exciting time and makes it even so much more so when everyone is also thrilled for you! 😊

We've still not told out immediate family. It feels so strange as with our son and the last pregancy we announced immediately but I'm enjoying that no one knows yet. For me, I feel like it's less pressure in these early weeks for things to
go well? I'm not exactly sure how to explain it so maybe someone can relate?! Anyway, if things go well at the scan next week and once I've got the first appointment out of the way, I'll be announcing at the end of the month. I'm hoping it goes well as my mum told me to wait before trying again and I recently found out that she told my sister she wants us to wait a few months after the loss - I'm thinking she's concerned it might happen again if we get pregnant immediately after - which of course is what happened in our case and I found out about the new pregancy just 4 weeks after my m/c. Ahhh 😬, I hope she takes it well and will be more excited that worried given that we'll be around 9-10 weeks by then (assuming everything goes well up to that point).

barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 08:27

Well...

Had a few twinges on Friday night. Just a couple of short contractions, not at all close together. Managed to sleep okay, had some paracetamol, all fine. Up yesterday morning, and still having them, but over ten minutes apart, so thought we'd be there for a day or so.

Late morning, down to maybe 7 minutes between contractions, called triage and they said to wait til 4 minutes, so had lunch. And then it all got a bit more serious... luckily my mum was there, so left the boys and ran. In the 45 minute car journey, down from 6 minutes to 3, with the occasional 1 minuter. Only just got to the hospital in time.

Straight into triage (should probably have gone straight to labour ward...) where I demanded gas and air. They tried to examine me - "just tell us when there's a break in contractions" - there was no break. They cleared everyone else out of triage, as they thought I was going to have her there and then (saw a head). Managed to get me through to labour ward, very nearly had her in the corridor. And god they need to have a system where you can take the gas and air WITH you for the transfer!

Born pretty bloody quickly, a little tear but not too bad. And she's pretty perfect! Feeding well, 3290g. Home in time for bed, just introduced her to the boys, and all good! Finding having a girl VERY odd, lovely though. I did spot what I thought was a pair of balls and say "ooh, another boy" 🫢

Thank you all for your kind wishes, hope everyone's doing well. X

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Mrs173 · 09/10/2022 08:31

@B1993 i totally understand not telling anyone yet. I’m 11 weeks today and it’s still only me and DH who know! We have a daughter who will be 2 in January and she was conceived 6 weeks after my first MMC and I told my mum about our LG at 7 weeks by crying that I thought I was having another Mc and can she please come and sit with our puppy as we needed to go for an emergency scan 🙈 then the same happened a week later (another huge bleed due to SCH) and I had to ask my sister! So I never got the chance to tell them when happy and excited. I wanted to wait until 12 week scan with this one (🙏🏼🤞🏼) so that I can enjoy telling them as this will hopefully be our last pregnancy!
of course your mum will be so excited for you! And like you say a lot of the early weeks worry will be “over” by then - at least I hope that is the case for you as even at 11 weeks it doesn’t feel the case for me 🙈

I called my hospital on Friday to ask when I can expect a scan appointment and they told me they don’t even have a referral from my booking appointment which was 2.5 weeks ago!

Mrs173 · 09/10/2022 08:39

Awhh @barneymcgroo sounds amazing!! All very quickly but you were obviously doing amazing at home managing! Every success story on here is so lovely to read. Congratulations and enjoy your amazing newborn bubble 💗💗

Skl2021 · 09/10/2022 08:43

@barneymcgroo aww so glad everything went well ❤️ sounds very similar to mine they obviously didn't want to wait 🙈🤣 do you have a name yet? Xx

B1993 · 09/10/2022 08:52

Thank you @Mrs173! Well done to you and your husband for keeping quiet so long! I'm not sure that I'll be able to wait much longer if I'm honest - we normally let the cat out of the bag at 3.5-4 weeks (🙈) and I'm so bad at keeping secrets. Luckily, I've not had too many questions - I think because people are trying to be sensitive after my loss so I've not had to lie about it.

I remember with my son that I was anxious the entire time and never felt like I was out of the woods, so to speak. I feel more positive this pregnancy, weirdly enough. I think it's helped that I've made it past my loss now.

RE scans, can you self refer? If not, I'd be calling the midwife and pushing them to do it ASAP! Are you planning a special reveal for family after the scan? Or are you doing a simple announcement and showing the scan? Have you seen the t-shirts for siblings that say 'promoted to big brother/sister'?

B1993 · 09/10/2022 08:58

@barneymcgroo It sounds like you had an intense time! Your story actually sounds a bit similar to my birth story with my son - except I didn't feel confident enough to advocate for myself so didn't get any gas and air/pain relief 🤦🏻‍♀️ Well done to you for making yourself heard! 👏🏻👏🏻

I'm fairly new to the thread so forgive me for asking if you've already said, but did you keep baby's sex a surprise for birth? If so, I'm sure it must have been a bit of a shock after 2 boys?

I'm pleased you and baby are doing well! Do you have a name for her (I understand if you'd prefer not to share!). 💕

Cruz86 · 09/10/2022 09:38

Congratulations @barneymcgroo! What a story 🙌🏻 And to be home in time for bedtime too, just amazing. Enjoy your new little bundle 💕

barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 09:43

@Mrs173 Thank you - was all totally fine at home, until it wasn't... Was a bit worried she'd be born in the Lidl car park!

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barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 09:43

@Skl2021 Yep, no hanging around. Definitely last baby! Not doing that again...

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Skl2021 · 09/10/2022 09:47

@barneymcgroo that's the exact thing I said! 🤣 Never again!!!! My births have got worse the more I have had couldn't handle another trauma! 🙈 Enjoy your little girl 💜🌈 xx

barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 09:51

@B1993 It was quite intense! I knew I LOVED gas and air from DS2, so knew to ask for it (I sounded like my 2yo - PLEEEEAAASE get me gas and air!). Also knew that it made me into a comedy legend, but that's a different story...

Nearly settled on a name. Will use my cousin's name as a middle name - she died a few years ago, so delighted to be able to use it.

Yep, quite a shock after two boys. Obviously she's still going to have to like tractors...

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barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 09:52

@Cruz86 Thank you! Newborn cuddles are the BEST!

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barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 09:53

Hope everyone else is doing well?

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Arwen7 · 09/10/2022 10:05

Aww @barneymcgroo glad you made it in time and that everything was fine even though intense. Well done you! If someone having her third baby was to tell me they are having contractions 7min apart I would definitely ask them to go to hospital straight away!

How lovely to experience having a girl for your last one too. Enjoy this special time 💕

calimc83 · 09/10/2022 10:07

@barneymcgroo ohhh love your birth story! It sounds amazing...did u find gas and air did anything for you? Your labour sounds v similar to my 2nd and it did bugger all 😆🙈..@B1993 only a few friends know about our pregnancy. My parents still don't ( they're on holiday and have been since late Aug) I kind of want to get the 20 week scan out the way! And currently in the midst of soft play hell...🙈🙈😬 xx

barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 10:17

@calimc83 I LOVED gas and air! They had to take it away between triage and labour ward, and I swore at them.

Also, so much for my hippy water birth...

Did manage it all on hands and knees though - gravity helps!

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barneymcgroo · 09/10/2022 10:17

@Arwen7 Well now I know...

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calimc83 · 09/10/2022 10:42

@barneymcgroo 😆😆. Ladies, those of you with 3 now @Skl2021 please report back on how u are handling it? My 2 are such a handful at the mo..scaring me to have 3! X

B1993 · 09/10/2022 10:55

@barneymcgroo I'm hoping to try it this time! Don't want to do non-medicated again, in fact I I didn't the first time, but things progressed too quickly and there was 'no time' for any pain relief, or so I was told 🙈

I really wanted to do a water birth last time and would love to try for that this time too 😊

What a lovely tribute 💗💗

@calimc83 I know your pain! DS had two birthday parties to attend yesterday, one of which was soft play! 🙈

Arwen7 · 09/10/2022 10:58

@barneymcgroo ha seriously you never know how far someone lives and things can escalate so quickly as it happened to you! You are a pro now anyway 😜

calimc83 · 09/10/2022 11:17

@B1993 😆🙈 oh wow 2 in a day. That's hardcore 😆 x